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The UNFORTUNATE Truth...

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Hammond Egger, Feb 4, 2022.

  1. Feb 4, 2022 #1
    Hammond Egger

    Hammond Egger Fapstronaut

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    I don't believe it's ever safe for Porn addicts to ever have sex or masturbate again.

    Why? because those things will eventually lead us back into P. It's classical conditioning 101. Look up Pavlov's dogs. Pavlov would give dogs food and ring a bell, and pretty soon the dogs started salivating when he rang the bell but didn't give them any food (the bell and the food were tied together in their brains just like Orgasm and Porn are tied together in our brains).

    Face it fellas, were just like those dogs. It sucks, but it's true.

    Many people on here have mentioned that masturbating without looking at P is dangerous because MO and P are tied together in our brains and we will eventually fall back into P. This has definitely been the case for me. Every time I tried to M without P I had severe cravings to look at P. People have called this the chaser effect.

    Furthermore, people who have sex also mention that they get strong urges and cravings to look at P, even after hundreds of days being free from it. Heres a thread of a guy who went 1 year without P but when he started having sex with his girl he went back to it:

    https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/relapse-after-a-year-after-dating-regular-sex.323562/

    I don't know about you, but that's a terrifying thought for me. It seems like we have permanently linked orgasm and ejaculation with Porn. Unfortunately, I don't think it's ever safe to have sex or masturbate again.

    Face it fapstranauts, celibacy is the only way to true freedom.
     
    Hammond Egger, Feb 4, 2022
    Hammond Egger, Feb 4, 2022
    #1
    Uvuvwevwevwe and (deleted member) like this.
  2. Feb 5, 2022 #2
    Overforme

    Overforme Fapstronaut

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    I can back up what you have said. In serious relationships, I craved porn even more. I don't even know why.
     
    Overforme, Feb 5, 2022
    Overforme, Feb 5, 2022
    #2
    The Evangelist likes this.
  3. Feb 5, 2022 #3
    2080Future

    2080Future Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    Even if it's not safe, i don't think that we should try to completely cut off sex from our lives. We should when we are in the early stages of rebooting, but i think that the goal of curing our PMO addictions is creating for us a healthy relationship with sex, not completely cut it off our lives.
    First, I do think P and M must be completely cut off, no questions asked.
    We need to rewire our brains to enjoy real sex with a romantic partner (no prostitutes or hookups), and not live the rest of our lives scared of our own brains.
    Of course, this PMO to real sex path must be taken slowly and carefully, instead of avoiding taking it at all.
     
    2080Future, Feb 5, 2022
    2080Future, Feb 5, 2022
    #3
  4. Feb 5, 2022 #4
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Its terrifying but i know it's the truth. The sad reality of porn addicts like us.
     
    Deleted Account, Feb 5, 2022
    Deleted Account, Feb 5, 2022
    #4
    The Evangelist likes this.
  5. Feb 5, 2022 #5
    Do all to the glory of God

    Do all to the glory of God Fapstronaut

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    I've never been a porn addict, so take this post with a grain of salt; perhaps equivalent to the one with no children giving parenting advice.

    The major attraction of porn is what? I've been told it's the novelty. New people, new pictures, new interest.

    For me, were it not for the fact that much of what I have chanced to see grosses me out and I can't bear to see it, the attraction might be the forbidden nature of it--something forbidden always seems immediately more desirable. "You cannot have any cookies." Suddenly you want cookies, whereas just a moment before you were not even thinking of them, much less desiring them.

    A more complete list of potential attractions, as I see it, follows:

    • Novelty
    • Secrecy
    • It's forbidden
    • It's seductive/suggestive
    • Hedonistic

    Now, compare against what one finds in a committed relationship:

    • One person only
    • Relationship is publicly known
    • It's legal
    • Tends to become routine
    • Should be unselfish

    These are virtually opposite principles. So if one is attracted to the one side, one will be, by the same measure, less attracted to the other side. In theory, I think it is possible to shift one's interest. This would only happen by becoming truly "sick of" (disgusted with) the former habits--to the point of turning away from it with a complete rejection of it going forward.

    How does one learn to hate it? By knowing the truth about it, and how damaging/offensive it is. This is really the only way, as I see it. As a Christian, my reading material teaches me such truth, and it has been this truth which has guided me away from porn from my teen years onwards.

    If you learn the truth, the truth can set you free, and a new life, with new desires and habits, is possible.
     
    Do all to the glory of God, Feb 5, 2022
    Do all to the glory of God, Feb 5, 2022
    #5
    Icewarrior, Abel100% and SwedishViking like this.
  6. Feb 5, 2022 #6
    samst

    samst New Fapstronaut

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    OMG! Thanks for sharing :)
     
    samst, Feb 5, 2022
    samst, Feb 5, 2022
    #6
    The Evangelist likes this.
  7. Feb 5, 2022 #7
    Hammond Egger

    Hammond Egger Fapstronaut

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    Exactly! It's called the chaser effect. It's very depressing for us, but I think the best shot we have is to go a few YEARS without PMO, and then find a partner. Our goal is to minimize the Porn pathways as much as possible so that when we get urges and cravings, they are manageable. I think the urges will always be there, but if we can manage to go a few years without it, they will be easy to ignore.
     
    Hammond Egger, Feb 5, 2022
    Hammond Egger, Feb 5, 2022
    #7
    2080Future and Eagle_man like this.
  8. Feb 5, 2022 #8
    Long Range

    Long Range Fapstronaut

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    Sorry but I have to disagree. Yes the chaser effect is real, so you have to be aware of it, but it can be over come. It is very possible to get back to a normal healthy sex life, you just have to stop using porn, focus you energy on other more productive areas of your life and get into a normal healthy sex life with your partner.

    This thread is a good example that it is possible and of what can be achieved by someone who has permanently given up PMO:https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?t...from-quitting-porn-10-year-anniversary.79544/
     
    Long Range, Feb 5, 2022
    Long Range, Feb 5, 2022
    #8

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