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This girl

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Alien Alex, Mar 26, 2017.

  1. Alien Alex

    Alien Alex Fapstronaut

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    I dont know if its NoFap related but ive fallen in love with a girl. Im nearing the end of my senior year in high school and ive known her since 7th grade. Im convinced that she's the most amazing girl in the world and when i look in her eyes the feeling i get cant be described by words. Shes the most beautiful thing ive ever laid eyes on and im so incredibly attracted to her. I literally cant stop thinking about her. But... she is kinda dating a guy i know. We hang out all the time because were all in the same friend group. I really feel like we have a connection, way more so than her last boyfriend or the guy she just recently started being with. Her last three boyfriends have all been close friends of mine, so i dont know if im crazy or what but it seems like shes just dating them to be closer to me. Anyway, every day that goes by that we arent together absolutely breaks my heart into a million pieces. All i want right now is her, and not having her makes me extremely depressed recently. Maybe i would have more of a chance of making a move but every time she is near me i get really bad anxiety and have to throw up. We can usually have conversations and sit next to each other at school, but stuff like cuddling and just her being physically close to me after ive eaten food makes me vomit automatically. Thus, furthering my depressive feelings about my situation. I dont know if she'll even consider me more than a really good friend because of this. WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO?
     
    Bryaan likes this.
  2. NoneForMeThanks

    NoneForMeThanks Fapstronaut

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    Hey friend,

    I remember being in high school. It is a very emotional time. Your hormones are clearly going nuts!!! First, YOU HAVE TO TALK TO HER MORE. Gauge if she has any interest in you. I'll tell you right now she doesn't know what she wants. If you show up, be a stud, and steal her interest the other guy will be out the door in 2 seconds. However If she doesnt seem interested, it will be best for you to move on. Being obsessed with a girl who is seeing someone else, and who isnt interested in you is not going to end well. trust me. Talk to her more and see what happens mate.

    -None
     
    Bryaan and Fourtyeight like this.
  3. Alien Alex

    Alien Alex Fapstronaut

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    How do i tell if shes interested in me? It seems like she is, whenever we talk both of us cant help but smile. So should i just take the next step and ask her if she wants to go on a date?
     
    LegendaryToast, Bryaan and TheMeInMe like this.
  4. TheMeInMe

    TheMeInMe Fapstronaut

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    I'm fresh out of high school so I know the emotions you're going through. I might not have the same affection as yours but damm I met this girl in 8th grade and I've never let my eyes off her. However she said she thought of me as just a friend. Yep I was devastated but now I'm feeling fine. Talking to other girls and such really helps. If she is dating (since you guys are good friends) ask if she is happy with her current boyfriend. If she isn't (I know this sound sinister..) but try and convince her to dump her current boyfriend for you...(OBLIVIOUS in a very very very discrete manner) It's obvious you have some serious emotions towards her but I will give you one final tip. Lust is a sin, so try your best to NOT be a lustful puppy! I think it's because of how lustful I was towards my crush was what scared her off. Lesson learned.

    Also I've heard how once you acquire someone that you lust over theres a chance it could go down hill, since she is yours and that attraction might even sadly fade away...I actually don't know what I'm talking about here but just be careful!

    Good Luck!
     
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  5. NoneForMeThanks

    NoneForMeThanks Fapstronaut

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    Hell yeah you should! Just see what happens
     
  6. This
     
    Bryaan and Alien Alex like this.
  7. Impossible to like this enough!
     
    Bryaan and Alien Alex like this.
  8. To fix the anxiety I highly suggest cold showers. Its a great treatment to grow confidence and It's personally helped me a lot. I'm 17 so I'm guessing your around the same age as me. I've seen my confidence grow from being completely scared to go up to my crush to having a regular fun conversation with her. Cold showers have also helped me see that there's more than one girl out there, Because, Like you, I was in total love with this one particular girl and after starting cold showers I realized there's more than one girl out there. I now feel fearless and I'm no longer stuck on one girl. Focusing one girl is quite dangerous, but if you honestly feel like a relationship is possible go for it. Best of luck!
     
    Nadeem, Bryaan and Alien Alex like this.
  9. J247

    J247 Fapstronaut

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    Wtf is this witchcraft? How on earth would cold showers do that?
     
    Bryaan likes this.
  10. Alien Alex

    Alien Alex Fapstronaut

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    Interesting... i might as well give it a try! Ive heard about this having some positive health benefits!
     
    WhyNotStop and Bryaan like this.
  11. Ghost_Rider

    Ghost_Rider Fapstronaut

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    Thats how i used to and all my friends used to bullshit ourselves when we were in school and college. :D
    Look bro, i know what u feel, i have gone that road and i know how it feels.
    U want to know what to do?, tell her u like her, she will say no "lets just be friends"
    You say, nope i cant be friends with u because i really like u and i want to date u.
    If she says no,. just walk away and dont initiate any talk with her, if she talks to u be polite but thats it.
    Stand up for what u want or u will always end up in friendzone.
    Also, i wouldnt consider this girl as a long term gf material, she is good for casual/open type relationship.
    Best of luck bro :)
     
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  12. Bryaan

    Bryaan Fapstronaut

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    Cold showers (very cold water, and everything really cold) increase your testosteron levels for a while, because your body starts to produce more testosteron in order, ro make you badass enaught, to get out of that situation, that nearly stops your hearth (I mean could showers + be careful, it could literally kill you)

    I usually first direct some cool, or a littlebit colder than cool water to my chest (because our hearths are the critical points), then to my shoulders.
    After I'm comfortable with the current temperzure of the water, I start to slowly poor colder water to myself, because it won't f*ck my hearth, like if I would start with 8 °C water.
    I repeat this, until the water is so cold, that it actually kinda burning my body. I shower with that water for like 3 more minutes, then stop. So I usually shower for 5-10 minutes.

    And I suggest you, to wait until the end of the year, and do NoFap. Don't relapse, anything happens, because this way you will be more attractive for her, when you ask her out. And make sure to look great, and to use cologne - not too much, just the right ammount -, because fragrences have a huge impact on girls ( and boys ), because the place in your brain, where you feel the freagrances, is the closest section to the part of the brain, where our emotions are made. So it has a bigger influence. ;)

    Good Luck

    (I'm still learning this language, forgive me for the mistakes)
     
    Alien Alex likes this.
  13. Ok man ... You are in love.
    And Love hurts.

    First of all ... Dont do anything nonsense... In love we look at even small things like they are big signs. Like even if she looks at you ... You might have felt that she loves you too or she want to get close. It might be possible that she might be intrested but still love can cause such dillusions. So rule number one (everyone break this rule during their first love like i did )

    Follow your heart but take your brain with you.

    Secondly ... Dont forget your real work (studies) in your love life. I know its easy for people to say go talk to her... She is the one. But love shuts up mouth xD. Thats love.

    Thirdly... Remember first two things ... Because they will affect your future. And you know her better than anyone else so i cant give you tips to flirt or get her. Usually i say one thing love the girl who loves you. Because i feel that boys are more generous in love (they give away everything ... Thats wht i mean) in love while girls dont.

    This reminds me of a mathematician ..... 18-20 years old .... Fell in love .... Suicide .... Wtf He was mathematician at the age of 18.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 1, 2017
    Bryaan likes this.
  14. I donno ...but this reminds me of someones past.
     
  15. TheMeInMe

    TheMeInMe Fapstronaut

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    This tip is gold!
     
  16. Give it a try man. Check out this TED video that motivated me to start taking cold showers and the benefits that come from them.
     
  17. J247

    J247 Fapstronaut

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    So how cold is cold? Are we talking about freezing or just a little below luke warm?
     
  18. J247

    J247 Fapstronaut

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    I'm convinced lol.
     
    WhyNotStop likes this.
  19. Mistakesweremade

    Mistakesweremade Fapstronaut

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    That is sort of along the lines of self-delusion. If she was than she would be the one that is crazy & not you when she could've just asked you directly rather than go thru 3 meaningless relationships just to get to you...
     
    Alien Alex likes this.

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