this is the reason why men watch porn!

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Thomas Smith, Mar 24, 2019.

  1. Toomuchh

    Toomuchh Fapstronaut

    270
    247
    43
    The idea women don't express sexual interest is bullshit. They do in more subtle ways than guys. Like a lingering touch, a flutter of the eyelashes, a coy look, laughing at your shitty jokes. It's not as direct but as long as you aren't autistic there are cues for you to pick up on.
     
    Lilla_My and Deleted Account like this.
  2. Thomas Smith

    Thomas Smith Fapstronaut

    131
    66
    28
    First of all, these cues are WAY more subtle than what guys do. A flutter of the eyelashes? Really?? "not as direct" - what an understatement. And secondly, these cues are often in response to what guys do. But even the ones that are not in response - a coy look vs. someone coming up to you and saying you're pretty and asking you out - not even in the same ballpark. What a shitty hand guys have been dealt.
     
  3. Thank God for this one...

    Of all the shitty hands in all the shitty world you had to shittily deal this one....the world's smallest violin plays for the men who have to decode female behavior...:)
     
    Lilla_My and NamaClature14 like this.
  4. Thistimeitsfinal

    Thistimeitsfinal Fapstronaut

    153
    268
    63
    I don’t care what anybody thinks, this forum is helping a ton of people improve their lives and relationships in so many ways. Enough said.
     
  5. Thomas Smith

    Thomas Smith Fapstronaut

    131
    66
    28
    Lol. Funny. But, seriously, besides basic physical needs like food and shelter, finding a mate is next in importance. It is the greatest emotional need for most people. And when women get direct attention, but men get little or very subtle attention, things suck for guys. I don't know how else to assess it.
     
  6. I agree with this IF we agree to stop conflating so many things. Sex cant be conflated with porn. Love and emotional needs cant be conflated with sex. Expressions of desire cant be conflated with emotions or sex or relationships. This whole discussion has spread and become so messy I cant really tell what we are even talking about. I feel bad for people who dont experience love, but love can come without sex right? Sex can be divorced from emotional response right? Porn is none of the above right? So if men want love but turn to porn that doesn't make sense because porn doesn't give them love or sex. But if men turn to sex they aren't guaranteed love and finding love doesn't guarantee your sex needs are met either.

    Please describe your ideal state. What is a perfect world according to Thomas. Earlier you said it was a world where women are honest...what does that mean for men who honestly aren't desired by women? They can get sex or love? Or just the sex part? They are incels?
     
    NamaClature14 likes this.
  7. Thomas Smith

    Thomas Smith Fapstronaut

    131
    66
    28
    There are many men currently who get no attention from women, way more than the other way around. If women were more honest and direct, there would be far fewer men who wouldn't be getting any attention. I think there would respectively be a considerable number fewer men who would turn to porn.
     
  8. IR254

    IR254 Fapstronaut

    415
    1,584
    123
    I doubt it. Just look at how many people use porn, although they are in a healthy loving relationship.
     
  9. This is incredibly worded and the profound truth behind the mascarade of confusion that have so many men slamming their heads against the wall. The real issue underlying this thread Max is that depth you must reach in yourself to begin separating desire, from sex, from love, is a place many don't truly desire to go to. Because then the fantasy can no longer survive. The excuses, the comfort of ignorance, its taken away and then your left with one and only one truth. That I and I alone am solely responsible for my happiness and my life.
    There is a change in that 1 idea that takes "love" from being something "I must seek in another or find from outside of me," to something rather that I BECOME. All mirrors in life point back to us. Our perception.

    There's a million things any individual will tell themselves to justify not doing this. But the law of compensation correlates with mother nature perfectly and it is always without fail in direct correlation to our thoughts actions and the degree of response-ability we take for all things in our life.
     
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2019
    Deleted Account likes this.
  10. AspiringVitality

    AspiringVitality Fapstronaut

    341
    395
    63
    Don't wish life were easier, wish you were better
    (mic dropped)
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  11. Thomas Smith

    Thomas Smith Fapstronaut

    131
    66
    28
    As I already said, many guys get into porn before they find someone. The loneliness as a boy often leads to porn use or addiction, and then when they age and find a girlfriend/wife, porn already has its hooks in them.
     
  12. Thomas Smith

    Thomas Smith Fapstronaut

    131
    66
    28
    You really don't wish life were any easier?
     
  13. Thomas Smith

    Thomas Smith Fapstronaut

    131
    66
    28
    I'm not disagreeing there, but I still think it helps to realize what holds guys back. And one thing that hurts guys is that they don't get nearly the attention from the opposite sex as women do.
     
  14. AspiringVitality

    AspiringVitality Fapstronaut

    341
    395
    63
    Sometimes. But then I say to myself "it is what it is.." and go try to look for answers and ask God "please give me signs or give me some direction about what I can DO about all this"
     

Share This Page