No, the picture isn't a horrible trigger. The problem is that many of us come to this site when we are in a serious battle with PMO urges and teetering between failing horribly or finding strength to move forward. The last thing we need is to be distracted at that fragile moment.
Here's the thing I hate about this entire argument.... Women are the minority here, obviously. I already have a sort of "filter" in my mind that says I probably shouldn't be too detailed with some of my struggles, because I wouldn't want to cause anyone to stumble. All the while, men walk around talking about their dick and their balls and how they're "so f***ing hard right now," most likely not stopping for a second to be mindful of how triggering those words and statements might be to the women here. In perusing the "what do fapstronauts look like afk" thread, just before I was about to post my picture, I read a comment from some boy who said that women probably aren't posting their pictures because they know what a turn on it is to think of women struggling with porn. I ended up posting my pic anyway, but I had private conversations with two different male friends about whether or not it was a good idea, discussing the pros and cons, because that comment discourged me and made me feel like I was slightly less welcome to post than anyone else, simply because I'm a woman. And now, people want to take away a resource and an ad that is relatable to us women and makes us feel encouraged, better about ourselves, less stigmatized... All because a minority of the NoFap population might possibly find a fully clothed, attractive woman triggering. If you can't see how selfish that is... Then I have nothing else to say. Edit: another important question is where does this end and at what point do we need to stop blaming others and start taking responsibility for our actions? I mean I used to get off on stories about premature ejaculation experiences. There is certainly a plethora of those here on NoFap, but should I request they be removed? Of course not, that's insane. I'm responsible for my own thoughts and I need to control myself. If I click on a thread because it sounds arousing to me, that's my fault, not the OPs.
We are all here to help one another let's not argue as it defeats the object of the reboot, even if you joke people can take offence and can cause stress which is a even bigger trigger, please think before you joke with people's feelings.
The joke is not aimed at anyone specifically which is why I didn't quote anyone. I use humor to get my point across. Not being able to use humor stresses me out, causing me to be triggered. Please try harder to support me better in the future.
Started off funny then turned into a hella insensitive chat. We're all running our race at different paces - not every here is Usain Bolt. The brother expressed an issue which HE finds. It's not about any of you, it's about HIM. Try to be a little more encouraging when you see that your constructive criticism isn't triggering a healthy/positive reaction. Golgo, it's highly likely that ad will remain there. Best thing you can do is scroll back up or change the page. But if you keep growing in fighting this addiction, things such as that will become child's play. Right now, you have no choice BUT to be strong. It's part of the process. All the best!
@TakingTheSteps just nailed it right there. I think that pretty much sums it up. Noone is forcing to u look at it, and if it still is a problem, then there is a thing called Adblock for you
To be frank I don't think anyone is trying to push Golgo's view out, but rather we are discussing the ramifications of such a view on this site if it was entertained. The "where does it end" discussion.
Who's attacking exactly ? We are just giving a feedback about it. He ,,pushed'' the idea about an ad to remove and we ,,pushed'' our opinions about it. I think it's just a discussion here, we are exchanging our opinions on the whole thing, what's wrong with that?
Fine, keep the stupid ad. But if someone ends up relapsing because of it don't come crying to me. I am very sensitive when it comes to things like this (I don't look at normal pictures of girls, explicit or not) and I am just trying to look out for the community.
Correct me if I'm wrong. Isn't this journey also about learning a new mentality(or rather, the original before porn affected us)? To get rid of that old way of thinking porn and the media taught us, that women(or men) are just sexual objects to us. Sexuality is a very subjective matter and what one finds arousing can be completely different than what others do. But a line has to be drawn somewhere. Luckily it's also possible to unlearn some things and thinking patterns that we have learned concerning sexuality. That's what rebooting is all about; our brain unlearning those patterns from which we used to get our sexual satisfaction. When we are rebooting and weeks turn to months, it's understandable that we get more sensitive. But that's just part of the journey. That kind of hyper sensitivity is only temporary and it will pass. Flatlines and those hyper libido peaks will get a lot less frequent. The media creates content and material that's a lot more sexier than that picture. If one can't handle a picture like that, then they really need to learn to, for their own good. @Golgo 13 I wish you good luck on your reboot, buddy. Stay strong and get stronger still.
Amen to that brother, I like your honesty, that's how you win these mini battles, I also found that girl on her phone pic to be attractive, don't let the negative coments on this thread get you down, have a great day.
Having the woman looking at her cellphone made me think that the ad was implying that she was looking at p on her phone.
