Thoughts on: What does it mean to be a man?

Peace467

Peace467

Fapstronaut
So this is basically a thred for you to give your opinions on what it means to be a man in todays society. It's something that I have been thinking alot about lately and something that I find interesting as a mans role seems to have changed drastically over the last few decades.

So I'm curious: What do you think it means to be a man? And men of this forums, what do you aspire to be?
 
  • A man should be confident in his abilities but not arrogant
  • A man shows respect for women and others
  • A man protects his loved ones
  • A man keeps himself strong mentally and physically
  • A man owns his actions and responsibilities
  • A man is honest, faithful and respectful to his SO
  • A man is willing to sacrifice his own comfort for the safety and happiness of his loved ones
I think that about covers it.
 
I hate being a boy, I hate the association with us and football and sport and muscle and being rough and wearing nike adidas sport chavy shit clothing. I hate all that. I wish we could go back to the 80s and 90s, with quality goods and respect one another and just kinda be whatever. But yeah, I mean im not a manly man, and then if your too feminine as a guy people call you gay so you just can't win. Although, I dont mean to complain, I know girls have it harder and I hate the fact people see men as superior in some way it's so fucking stupid. But idk what I can do about that. But yeah that's all I guess
 
pezzy⚡️ said:
I hate being a boy, I hate the association with us and football and sport and muscle and being rough and wearing nike adidas sport chavy shit clothing. I hate all that. I wish we could go back to the 80s and 90s, with quality goods and respect one another and just kinda be whatever. But yeah, I mean im not a manly man, and then if your too feminine as a guy people call you gay so you just can't win. Although, I dont mean to complain, I know girls have it harder and I hate the fact people see men as superior in some way it's so fucking stupid. But idk what I can do about that. But yeah that's all I guess
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Hey I get what your saying, but I think it's interesting because all of what you talked about is essentially a material thing that culture / advertising / the media has forced onto men as there Identity. Having been a brony I understand how it can feel horrible at times and people take the mick just beucase you don't like 'manly things' but having read @DemonSemen 's post, I don't think that is what defines a man but what he said?
 
Why should I care about playing a role in todays society though? It seems like a lot of what might be said would be what it means to be a man in SPITE of todays society and the typical standard and role.

Now if you want to talk about the expectation of todays women that's a little more specific, but again we're talking about the average anyway.
 
Ongoingsupport said:
Why should I care about playing a role in todays society though? It seems like a lot of what might be said would be what it means to be a man in SPITE of todays society and the typical standard and role.

Now if you want to talk about the expectation of todays women that's a little more specific, but again we're talking about the average anyway.
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This is less about trying to play a role and more about identity. Can you define what you mean by 'what might be said would be what it means to be a man in SPITE of todays society and the typical standard and role'. I think I understand it but i'm unsure.

The reason for this thread at heart was because I know a lot of my male friends are strugling with this question. Women are talked about alot by society (in the west atleast), but men are not, and so I wanted to see what people though. I think talking about the average is largely fine, so long as we except that there will be variations! But at the end of the day most people are around the 'average'.

But anyways I digress, what are your veiws on what a man should be in todays society overall? By not playing a role what do you mean? What do you aspire to be?
 
Peace467 said:
Hey I get what your saying, but I think it's interesting because all of what you talked about is essentially a material thing that culture / advertising / the media has forced onto men as there Identity. Having been a brony I understand how it can feel horrible at times and people take the mick just beucase you don't like 'manly things' but having read @DemonSemen 's post, I don't think that is what defines a man but what he said?
Click to expand...
Being a man isn’t about your clothing, your music, your sexual preference or if you watch My Little Pony cartoons.

It’s about being a protector, a provider, a role model for others and not being afraid to wade through the bullahit. You don’t have to be a tattooed alpha male MMA fighter who rides Harleys and breeds pit bulls while rebuilding carburetors in the winter while ice fishing and hunting bear.

It’s about a set of principles and a code you live by.
 
To me being a man is protecting others who are vulnerable and in need. To stand up for those who suffer injustice.

You can still have big cahoonas and be 55lbs, erm kg damn the US metric system.

To me this is 'Man'

*thumps chest*
 
Peace467 said:
This is less about trying to play a role and more about identity. Can you define what you mean by 'what might be said would be what it means to be a man in SPITE of todays society and the typical standard and role'. I think I understand it but i'm unsure.

The reason for this thread at heart was because I know a lot of my male friends are strugling with this question. Women are talked about alot by society (in the west atleast), but men are not, and so I wanted to see what people though. I think talking about the average is largely fine, so long as we except that there will be variations! But at the end of the day most people are around the 'average'.

But anyways I digress, what are your veiws on what a man should be in todays society overall? By not playing a role what do you mean? What do you aspire to be?
Click to expand...
This is a question many men struggle with today and I think porn is a symptom of that. We seek to numb our quest to find our identities staring at an LED screen with our pants around our ankles.

One one hand women want us to share our feelings, our thoughts and exhibit a level of vurneralbility but at the same time we are often portrayed in media as either inept goof balls, over-testosteroned gorillas, clueless twits or over sensitive crybabies.

All the while we are expected to respect women and embrace feminism but aspire to be “real men.” Often with little or no guidance from a father figure, while being bombarded with Pinterest, Instagram, YouPorn and mass media.

Maybe Tyler Durden was right: “Our war is a spiritual one.”
 
Men are leaders, the questions is how can YOU tell a leader from those self proclaimed leaders who actually perpetuate their own lies and are actually insecure followers?

Easy.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_W._Pennebaker

Pennebaker's discovers that those who overuse "I" tend to have lower status. This is obvious. Leaders are busy with the tasks of all the "you's" in his group(s) and low level workers only need to deal with themselves. However, leaders don't use "you's" because they're in power positions. Leaders simply have used "you's" all their lives. They were always concerned with others. They were thinking about the group, its dynamics, and its progress. It is these habits that bring 'leaders' into leadership positions. ("Self Conscious" is his issue)

Pennebaker has confused cause with effect. His letter samples are interesting because in his enthusiasm over counting the "I's" and "you's", it seems he forgot to read the letters:

1. Regardless of their status level, most people will write many "I's" when asked to write a 'favor letter'. This is simply due to the popular usage of the English language: "I am asking" . . . "I would like to invite you". . . "I would love it if " . . . ."If there is anything more I can do". . . "I am hoping."

2. Regardless of their status level, most people will write many "you's" when replying to 'favor letters' . . . again, simply due to the way we use language: "Thank you." "Nice to hear from you." . . .

Now here's when the rules change. Extremely low status, powerless people will almost always turn both 1 & 2 into "I Letters" whereas extremely high status, powerful people will turn both 1 & 2 into "You Letters". They might do this unconsciously, as Pennebaker assumes, but others will consciously and even painstakingly revise communications to a "you approach". Why? It's because they know that a 'you letter' is usually better received than a "me letter'. They know that a 'you letter' has a higher likelihood for compliance for whatever it is that they are trying to convey. They know that a 'you letter' tends to create deeper connections. The higher status that naturally comes from accomplishing these things well on a regular basis is if anything, an afterthought.

On the other hand the "I" people only care about status but fail to realize that their habits are counterproductive to what they are trying to achieve. Ironical . . .

^^
The takeaway, those of you who overuse 'I' tend to be selfish EGOTISTICAL liars. Those who overuse 'YOU' and 'WE' are concerned for those around them. Go ahead and do a search on these forums and you will find millions of dipshits using 'I . . .I . . . I, me, me,me'

It's all about them and that's it, that's why they won't get very far in their journals, however, everyone has a chance to change.
 
Peace467 said:
This is less about trying to play a role and more about identity. Can you define what you mean by 'what might be said would be what it means to be a man in SPITE of todays society and the typical standard and role'. I think I understand it but i'm unsure.

The reason for this thread at heart was because I know a lot of my male friends are strugling with this question. Women are talked about alot by society (in the west atleast), but men are not, and so I wanted to see what people though. I think talking about the average is largely fine, so long as we except that there will be variations! But at the end of the day most people are around the 'average'.

But anyways I digress, what are your veiws on what a man should be in todays society overall? By not playing a role what do you mean? What do you aspire to be?
Click to expand...
This is a question many men struggle with today and I think porn is a symptom of that. We seek to numb our quest to find our identities staring at an LED screen with our pants around our ankles.

One one hand women want us to share our feelings, our thoughts and exhibit a level of vurneralbility but at the same time we are often portrayed in media as either inept goof balls, over-testosteroned gorillas, clueless twits or over sensitive crybabies.

All the while we are expected to respect women and embrace feminism but aspire to be “real men.” Often with little or no guidance from a father figure, while being bombarded with Pinterest, Instagram, YouPorn and mass media.

Maybe Tyler Durden was right: “Our war is a spiritual one.”
Poseidon said:
View attachment 12138
Click to expand...
@Poseidon keeping it simple. No frills, all gills.
 
There's so many variables and circumstances that creates a person's personality / values / beliefs / desires.

What it means to be a man is the same thing I would want for what it means to be a woman / adult / child / transexual / homosexual / heterosexual / whatever else.

Which is to express yourself authentically and align yourself with people that you can mutually resonate with. Live life, learn, grow, and expand on the person that you are rather than trying to fit into a category or label. Just become a better person. Whatever that means to you.

I'm for some, but not for all. I consider myself a good person that's getting better as time goes on. I'm definitely not liked by everyone, but the people that are important to me appreciate my value. As a man and as a person.
 
My thoughts on what does it mean to be a man: Fairly close to what it means to be a woman, with a few minor differences. We're a lot more alike than we are different. Just keep that in mind. We are of the same species after all. So it stands to reason. Every bit of emotional nonsense that men complain about women doing, I've seen men display. Every bit of it.
 
Peace467 said:
This is less about trying to play a role and more about identity. Can you define what you mean by 'what might be said would be what it means to be a man in SPITE of todays society and the typical standard and role'. I think I understand it but i'm unsure.

The reason for this thread at heart was because I know a lot of my male friends are strugling with this question. Women are talked about alot by society (in the west atleast), but men are not, and so I wanted to see what people though. I think talking about the average is largely fine, so long as we except that there will be variations! But at the end of the day most people are around the 'average'.

But anyways I digress, what are your veiws on what a man should be in todays society overall? By not playing a role what do you mean? What do you aspire to be?
Click to expand...

Well just that it is always in relationship to something, as a man in relationship to woman, other men or boys in terms of maturation or society at large. My guess is there are a lot of things in society we don't necessarily like or agree with so we end up having to define what society is or is supposed to be..
 
If you can bench 400lbs. Then slam a 12 pack and go to the bar and bring the hottest chick home. Then eat 5 lbs of rare steak after a fierce night of love-making. Then to the shooting range for some late night practice rounds screaming "USA! USA! USA! USA! WOORAHH!!!!!"
 
A man knows what is it to be a man because he is a man needs no advice or opinions on this because he is real man
 
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