Threesomes

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Lolocosmos, Jul 12, 2019.

  1. Lolocosmos

    Lolocosmos Fapstronaut

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    I need opinions and help. I think that my unbelievably high desire for a threesome is a consequence of my addiction to pornography and masturbation.

    I have a girlfriend that I love and we have plans for the future and we love each other. It's a very healthy relationship.

    Yesterday I begun the 90-days hard challenge.

    I need opinions and help. I think that my unbelievably high desire for a threesome is a consequence of my addiction to pornography and masturbation. I don't want to do that, my identity is the one of a man that loves and spends time with one woman, and I have a highly successful life regarding to my body, my academical carreer, my relationships, etc. But I just feel this urge to have a threesome with my girlfriend and I'm just so fucking tired of having this urge.

    EDIT: I also have a foot fetish but my life and the life with my partner has been great with it. It doesn't compromise my identity. I binged porn watching and masturbating like 3-4 times a day.
     
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2019
    exito likes this.
  2. Welcome to the community.
    If this strong desire for a threesome is something you have been watching, then yes it is likely why you are feeling this.
    Be ready since you are just starting your journey, during the early stages this desire and others will get stronger. Give it time and stick with your plan and they will fade in time.
     
    Robinthehood, Lolocosmos and LavaMe like this.
  3. Tryinghardtoquit2

    Tryinghardtoquit2 Fapstronaut

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    I tend to think that if you try the hardmode for a period you will give yourself space from intrusive thoughts. I had all kinds of fucked up desires and thoughts on what was acceptable within a relationship that fell well outside my values and parameters. When I did a reboot it shocked my brain back into some level of normality.
     
    Allway88, Lolocosmos and LavaMe like this.
  4. LavaMe

    LavaMe Fapstronaut

    My opinion is that many people with pornography and masturbation habits have a larger sexual problem. That seems obvious enough since masturbation is sex. If you are engaging in fantasy and watching porn then it is going to impact your thoughts and desires. And thoughts precede actions.

    If I watch a show like the Walking Dead (back when it was good) I may start having thoughts and fantasies about me living in a zombie apocalypse. If I binge watch the show the chances are much higher. If I play a video game like Call of Duty the same thing may happen. Heck, once I played Tetris so much I started imagining the blocks coming down as I was trying to sleep.

    Our sexuality has a specific use. I don’t think that use is masturbation or threesomes. This is just like our appetite has a use but it isn’t so that we eat nothing but candy or otherwise gorge ourselves. So my opinion is that you allow yourself to get some distance from porn and masturbation and then see what you think and feel.
     
  5. Lolocosmos

    Lolocosmos Fapstronaut

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    Thank you very much, your thoughts and experiences give me so much hope.

    I'm extremely productive in my life, but the problem is that all my spare time that I earned increasing my productivity was used for a long, long time, (like 4 years now) for watching kinkier, and kinkier porn. And yes, I've become addicted to watch threesomes and orgies and more kinky stuff. I have a pair of fucking steel-made balls and I'm definitely not failing the challenge. But this has become crazy shit to the point that I was dreaming of having a super kinky threesome and I voluntarily woke up to avoid orgasming. That was yesterday when I realized I definitely had a problem with my sexual habits and didn't even wanna see it.
     
  6. Lolocosmos

    Lolocosmos Fapstronaut

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    Yes! I definitely had some really hard thoughts on wether this was acceptable or not within the relationship. And that just stole a lot of my time and energy. It's some really trash thinking motivated by this desire.

    What do you mean by "some level of normality", by the way?
     
  7. Lolocosmos

    Lolocosmos Fapstronaut

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    You are so right. I've read a lot of books and even applied that philosophy into my own life. But when it comes to my sexual desires my thoughts just go so numb the only thing there is is chaos. And now with NoFap a silver line.

    Thank you very much for your answer.
     
  8. SolaireofAstora

    SolaireofAstora Fapstronaut

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    lmao i cant even handle a single woman, thanks to my fucked up PIED , let alone two at the same time.
     
    General Urko likes this.
  9. Lolocosmos

    Lolocosmos Fapstronaut

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    PIED here too though
     
  10. Robinthehood

    Robinthehood Fapstronaut

    The first day you can certainly expect to face some hard times. Right now your brain is experiencing a severe drought of dopamine. But stay strong bro, it won't kill you. Confide in your girlfriend, share what you can with her, tell her what you are going through.
     
  11. Tryinghardtoquit2

    Tryinghardtoquit2 Fapstronaut

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    'Some level of normality ' by that i mean when i did a reboot i could see more clearly after rebooting and reflect on my behaviours.
     
  12. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    i don't masturbate at all and don't watch porn but still i'd like to have a threesome with my Gf and another girl. Maybe thats how men are made :)
     
  13. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    Pornography and masturbation (PMO) makes you acquire, crave weirder and more degrading fetishes the longer you keep using it. Simply because you need higher and higher dopamine doses every time you watch it and there have been plenty of straight guys who have even ended up watching gay-porn and similar which became their new level of "normal" addiction.
    I remember myself after I had been watching porn for 8-9 years that I got hooked on gang-bangs, bukakes, and hookers and wanted to partake in those weird things as that became my new level of normal. These days (when I have almost rebooted), I can't even grasp how I got interested in those things in the first place.
     
  14. Rehab101

    Rehab101 Fapstronaut

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    What if it is threesome with your girl and another guy?
     
  15. If you’ve been watching 3sums mostly your brain will crave it.

    As the above post suggests... why not have one with another man and your girlfriend? Oh, you don’t want to see another man fuck your woman? What if he’s bigger? What if he’s better? What if her eyes roll back in her head and you realize you’ve never made her feel like that? Unless your girlfriend has ever expressed her own interest in this, she doesn’t want it.
     
    dwarfstruggles likes this.
  16. Good point, would you still feel like this if it was the other way around?
     
  17. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    C__Data_Users_DefApps_AppData_INTERNETEXPLORER_Temp_Saved Images_fUAlkgbh.jpg
    Dude.
     
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  18. ItsInTheBag

    ItsInTheBag Fapstronaut

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    [​IMG]

    Or maybe that's how P makes them.

    To each its own, I can't imagine loving someone and doing that.

    [​IMG]
     
  19. exito

    exito Fapstronaut

    hi there

    i dont have any such desires but i had also binged on porn and masturbated 3-4 times a day
    did you felt any health problems , like i became really weak and skinny
     
  20. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    man, i don't watch porn.
     
    ItsInTheBag likes this.

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