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Time to be a man

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Chiefdontrun, Apr 27, 2021.

  1. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    25 year old who's had a crippling PMO addiction for the past 10 years.
    In addition to PMO, I've also been a heavy smoker since 18 and a drinker since 16.

    I recently made the decision to quit all these 3 habits. I haven't had a drink in 40 days. I've smoked only twice in those 40 days and I managed a 45 day PMO streak (my longest streak) that I broke 2 days ago as a result of some strong urges.

    Quitting alcohol and smoking actually isn't difficult for me at all. PMO however, is the real enemy.

    Among the long list of side effects, it has neutered my self esteem, self-confidence, made me over-sexualize women, made me emotionally numb, given me ED, made me disinterested and unable to maintain relationships (even with family and friends) and even stunted my physical growth.

    I'm at a point in my life where I NEED to stop this once and for all.
    I work at home, and as of this month, I live alone. I can not afford to continue this path of addiction.

    I am thankful that quitting alcohol & smoking + my previous Nofap streak helped me instill some new habits into my life like exercising, meditating and healthy eating. I hope to channel the power of these habits more consistently as I start my journey again.

    I have therefore made a commitment to journaling my daily experiences of Nofap in this forum in hopes that it will provide both an outlet and accountability for me, as well as a source of inspiration/ motivation for others.
     
  2. HE^MAN

    HE^MAN Distinguished Fapstronaut

  3. thepurplemirror

    thepurplemirror Fapstronaut

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  4. palindromo

    palindromo Fapstronaut

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    Welcome
    Please, start studying carefully what's happening in your mind > https://oceanrecoverycentre.com/2016/07/the-ultimate-guide-to-overcoming-internet-porn-addiction/

    First time without porn will be stressful , but if you resist , in some months you will feel reborn.

    If the first times a person relapse easly, it's okay.
    The streaks becomes even longer , day by day.
    Don't porn anymore, it's better to struggle and at the last to relapse than to look at porn.
    No more instagram pictures of models. No more erotic imagines , erotic stories or erotic asmr.

    We should improve in all area of our life, just being dissatisfied or stressed makes us relapse.

    An effective weapon to overcome urges and thoughts : mindfulness.
    The brain will try to win you and to get some triggers for the seek of dopamine. Resist

    If you need a concrete help you could install these porn blockers:
    https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?t...ve-your-willpower-an-aid-easy-streaks.272658/
     
    Chiefdontrun likes this.
  5. Robindale

    Robindale Fapstronaut

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    You've accomplished a great deal in a short amount of time. You should be proud of that. I don't read in your comments anywhere about any human interaction or support in your efforts to overcome PMO (or the other habits). I hear separation, loneliness and isolation. Maybe mention of your support network was just left out. If not, I would strongly encourage you to work with some live human interaction in your battle to overcome this. Doing it in isolation and "white-knuckling" it is ok for a short while, but generally does not lead to long-term success. That human connection can be through a therapist, a NoFap weekly support group or SAA group or any of the myriad support groups out there for PMO or sexual addiction, a trusted Accountability Partner, etc., or all of the above. To be able to voice your issues with honesty to another human being, and hear someone in a similar situation voice their issues and road to recovery, is so powerful. And ultimately helps lead you to dig deeper into the issues as to why you went to porn in the first place and stayed there. There are underlying issues you need to get at to live a healthy life with connection and intimacy, and healthy sexuality, and that type of support will help you get there. If you like listening to podcasts, I enjoy listening and get alot out of Porn Free Radio (www.recoveredman.com). Again, you have done so much so far and should be proud of that. Best wishes for continued long-term success.
     
  6. I find alcohol very hard to get away from but I feel at times I was almost able to.

    I feel the same about this.

    I think my mindset makes me feel like I want to indulge and simply ignore the fact these things will be my demise if I don't change really soon. A bit older though.
     
    palindromo likes this.
  7. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    May 1st 2021

    Day 1

    It was a good first day. Had a good sleep, ate healthy throughout the day and had some good exercise in form of an enjoyable 30 minutes of football/soccer in the evening with a bunch of other guys. No urges whatsoever
     
    eagle rising and palindromo like this.
  8. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for this. I think I somehow undervalued the role of human connection on my road to recovery prior to reading your comment. I actually started communicating with an AP this week, and we're now trying to start a small support group for others like ourselves. Having people going through the same thing who you can talk to and help motivate each other towards achieving your goals is a powerful thing like you mentioned. I'll also be sure to check out the podcast you sent me. Thank you once again :)
     
    palindromo likes this.
  9. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    Be strong my brother. We will beat these destructive vices. Let us choose the pain of self-discipline over the pain of regret
     
    palindromo likes this.
  10. Robindale

    Robindale Fapstronaut

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    That's awesome! Good luck with the group as it can be a very helpful and supportive experience.
     
    palindromo and Chiefdontrun like this.
  11. Henry321

    Henry321 Fapstronaut

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    How
    Great
     
    palindromo and Chiefdontrun like this.
  12. If you’ve already quit powerful addictions like smoking and alcohol then you’ve definitely got it in you to quit pmo. Good luck bro
     
    palindromo and Chiefdontrun like this.
  13. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    Cheers mate! We got this.
     
    palindromo likes this.
  14. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    02nd May 2021

    Day 2

    Had a chill day at home; eating healthy, getting some work done and chatting with some APs. No urges
     
    palindromo likes this.
  15. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    3rd May 2021

    Day 3

    Easy day. Had my mind occupied with exercise, work stuff and making my AP support group on discord. Pretty satisfied with it so far. I've got a healthy server going. No urges whatsoever
     
  16. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    4th May 2021

    Day 4

    Had a solid day. Familiarized myself with some new exercises and got some important work done with my job and bettering my support group. No urges
     
  17. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    05th May 2021

    Day 5

    Another easy day mostly working, exercising and working on the support group. No urges
     
  18. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    6th May 2021

    Day 6

    Had a chill day. No urges whatsoever but did have some PMO-related dreams late in the night. Woke up with relief that it was just a dream
     
  19. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    7th May 2021

    Day 7 report

    Had another chill day without urges though I had PMO-related dreams yet again at night. It will be a process, but as long as I keep sticking on the right path and weaken the neural pathways that are connected to those memories, this will fade.
     
  20. Chiefdontrun

    Chiefdontrun Fapstronaut

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    Day 8 report

    Chill day spent working, hanging out with family and playing football with some mates. It's been years since I played consistently so had a terrible game tbh (my fitness is shit), so there was a slight feeling of embarrassment after. In previous times, negative emotions like these might have been channeled towards PMO, but I chose to be wary and accepting of how I was feeling and decided to stay positive and redirected my thoughts towards other positive things
     

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