Time to give this a proper go.

J

Jesse115

New Fapstronaut
Hey I am 26 years old and I having been using porn since I was 12. I've had times in my life where I have gone months without using porn and even last year I went without porn for 2 months straight.
I thought the issue was resolved last year for me. But since being in a relationship again I haven't been able to gain that novel stimuli of different girls. Looking back on past relationships with this perspective given by nofap I can see that my porn addiction has negatively affected all my relationships.
It is time that I confront this issue head-on instead of ignoring. I realise now that if I ever want to have a long-term fulfilling monogamous relationship I need to defeat this addiction. I am doing PM mode, I feel like cutting out sex will cause an even greater rift between myself and my partner, any advice or thoughts would be appreciated.

Let it begin.

Jesse115
 
Hey @Jesse115 , welcome! I’m a fellow new user to NoFap, and it looks like we have a similar goal. I’m also going for PM mode in an effort to have a more meaningful relationship with my girlfriend as well as relinquish some of my wasted time. I would advise discussing this decision with your partner if you haven’t already; I’m sure she’d be happy to support you!

Make sure to decide on a concrete goal for days without PM, and consider starting a journal on NoFap. I just started mine, but I already see how making a habit of reaffirming one’s commitment to their goals can help lead to success.

Lastly, never get too down on yourself. It looks like you’ve already made some great accomplishments in the past for being porn free. We’re bound to make mistakes, but prolonged feelings of guilt are the enemy of progress! That’s a lesson I had to learn even before recognizing my addiction to PMO.

I hope you see success with your goals and have a good experience connecting with the rest of the community!
 
Jesse115 said:
any advice or thoughts would be appreciated.
Click to expand...
Hey @Jesse115 ,

I'm nobody special on here. Just a regular user saying, "welcome".

There is so much support on this forum, the profiles and the various groups. It works if you work it. I don't offer advise. I offer only my ESH (experience, strength and hope).

My ESH is that NoFap is about action and that meant work for me. It is not about "not doing something", for me, it is about working my program.

Work it? Oh yeah. There's work to be done, that's what's worked for me. Two things I've found necessary.

1. I had to Learn the NoFap Program.

2. Getting involved with the community on here was vital to help my recovery.

Learn the NoFap Program
The resources listed on the "New Users: List of Rebooting Resources" helped me find my way around the reasons behind the program and the terms used.

They are:

You can find this same list on the top of the forum you posted this message on at - the "New to NoFap" forum.

Get Involved with the Community
The community has been my lifeline. I've found journals I love, people who are very supportive and a place where I could get to work helping in a small way others.

Remember, I'm just a normal user with no magic powers. But, I can:

  • Read Journals, and comment when I have ESH

  • Find people I admire and stay in touch via their profiles

  • Pick a forum and make sure every post gets and answer. I can't answer them all, but that's good - different opinions make for a better group.

  • Post in my journal (I could be better at it - but I do milestone posts at least) To make a journal go to the section listed by age and start one. Keep all your journal posts in one thread. But, for random thoughts, you can create a new thread.
Looking forward to seeing you around on the forums,

--> L

PS – I Think of pmo like a wolf. If I Stay near the center of the group with the winners the wolf has a more difficult time finding me. But, stray near the edges of the community by not working my program and the wolf can pick me off.
 
For me NoFap is 1/2 program & 1/2 fellowship.

Click on these people and post a "hello" on their profiles.

I've found that the bricks that hold this community together are cemented with the support of the members of the fellowship.

@Chriss27
@bartbar
@mankiam33
@Freedom Fighter
@CrushPornBeneathYourFeet
@JakeO5
@Arohamystic
@MLMVSS
@Rising Sun !!
@JackMcWaffles


Look at with whom they exchange messages and you will find more profiles.

So, if you would have found more profiles yourself, why suggest these particular ones as a start? Those relationships started with just saying hello. So, my ESH is that saying hello has kept the fellowship alive for myself.

Looking forward to your success and in seeing you say hello on these profiles,

--> L
 
One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals. Reading other's stories with their victories and even defeats is a big part of my program.

I've included journals from all age groups, spiritual members, religious members, secular members, male and female. You should find journals that help. If not, look around, there are hundreds of others from which to choose. When I say "it works if you work it", reading journals is part of that work.

Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few:


@Barry Barnstein - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/138399/
---
@Freedom Fighter - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144710/
---
@JackMcWaffles - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/169456/
---
@mankiam33 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/164671/
---
@Inqonyama - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/166981/
---
@bartbar - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/163785/
---
@Alikersantti - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155162/
---
@Reverent - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/143845/
---
@BigDawg913 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/145872/
---
@kropo82 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/78164/
---
@tet2vd - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144513/
---
@Protagoras - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/109842/
---
@JakeO5 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/152940/
---

There are many more, and you can discover them on your own. But, these are great places to start.

This is a work in progress. So, if a journal has changed or is no longer active, look around there are some amazing journals on here.

--> L

PS - Starting a journal also helped me a great deal.

The journals are listed by age groups on the forum start page.

Most members run one journal only. That way both the member and others can go back and look at their journey at a later time.

Hope to read your journal soon. Also, in your personal details you can put a link to your journal. Then, appears under your avatar.

-
 
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