Tired and Lonely

I haven't had any sexual or intimate interactions in over 2 years now, haven't been in a meaningful relationship in over 5. In the past 2 years I've pretty much given up on dating or even pursuing potential dates.

I still occasionally talk/flirt with some girls but I never really follow through with any of them. Some of these girls I really wanted to go out with, but my self-esteem/worth/confidence was too low make a move. It's not that I'm awkward with women. I know how to properly (politely) flirt and be charming towards women. It's just that I can never make up my mind about my feelings, and it frustrates me.

Over the years this frustration manifested itself into moderate anxiety and severe depression. Since then, PMO has been my emotional anesthetic to help me deal with my loneliness. I never really gave myself the time to feel empty because I always had Porn whenever I want to feel "loved".

And now I'm on day 8 of my reboot, the longest I've done in over a year, and I can feel it creeping back. I feel like the only way I can overcome this cycle is if I can find a girl I can commit to. However, I moved back to my hometown (pop. 2200) 2 years ago and the only women near my age here are all taken/engaged.