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Tired of Life, Want to comit Suicide

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Fap_the_Fap, Jun 20, 2017.

  1. YngwieWanksteen

    YngwieWanksteen Fapstronaut

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    @Happy Man I'm not where you are, but you know that saying "the greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world he didn't exist"?

    This could be seen as a massive test if you step outside yourself and look at it.
     
    Berserk_ and Happy Man like this.
  2. Good advice. Sometimes we do not see the light at the end of the tunnel.

    Of course there is much more to life than sex. But in the fog of addiction and rebooting we don't see the real beauty.

    It's really touching me how much loving care and support is given. I am proud to be a member of Nofap.

    *Smile* Even I never was porn-addicted myself it was a weird thing to me not to feel any libido for some time. And I do like to feel the libido. So flatline for some months might be a real challenge in the process of rebooting.

    I am on this website now since about 10 weeks and I have read a lot of postings. Just wanted to get rid of my M-addicition, I was surprised to find the misery of those who are strongly porn-addicted. All I can say to those guys: Good luck and stay strong! Depressions and suicidal thoughts have no real substance, they will dissapear like the darkness dissapears when you lit a candle.

    That's it!

    Great!

    Well. We all have a mind and we all have a heart. This mind is very tricky and always wants us to feel miserable. Our heart is whispering: "All is well. Keep on trucking. Life is very, very precious. The day will come you will realize it." Listen to your heart!

    Fine. Words like these are motivating and encouraging those who are in their intense process of rebooting. Keep on posting! We always have to encourage each other. I already got a lot of help in these forums.
     
    Happy Man likes this.
  3. Amazing.
    This makes me think..
     
  4. Thanos

    Thanos Guest

    Stay strong, brother! We're into this fight with you! Don't let what became an addiction steal your life! Go outside of your house and live, work, learn! You've got so much life ahead of you!
     
  5. TonyJones1970

    TonyJones1970 Fapstronaut

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  6. FindingAName

    FindingAName Banned User

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    I have been addicted for 5 years and 10+ Orgasms a day. So by that logic I have had 18250 orgasms (give or take). And I'm being serious. If I feel like this guy in the upcoming months I will for sure become extremely suicidal
     
  7. Buddhabro

    Buddhabro Fapstronaut

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    So I gather that this addiction to PMO causes you to feel bad about yourself and expose weaknesses and frailties that rob you of the confidence to continue to want to live.
    Then after some time, you will confidently condemn yourself to death.
    Put your faith into moving forward and overcoming this addiction confidently.
    It's okay to not be afraid of death, but not okay to be afraid of living.
    Kill off the negativity and addiction to PMO instead.
     
  8. Powerous

    Powerous Fapstronaut

    KEEP GOING, TRUST ME WHEN I SAY: IT WILL GET BETTER!!! - IT WILL BE 100% WORTH IT AT THE END OF IT ALL.

    THE LONGER THE FLATLINE/WITHDRAWALS THE BETTER AND MORE POWERFUL THE BENEFITS YOU WILL GAIN!!!

    TRUST ME, I HAVE BEEN THERE IN THE PAST. I HAVE BEEN ADDICTED FOR 8 YEARS, AND ON LONG STREAKS I HAVE ALSO BEEN DEPRESSED BUT WHEN I NEVER GAVE UP IT GOT BETTER MUCH BETTER AND I FELT ALL THE AMAZING BENEFITS!!!

    ''If you are going through hell keep going'' - Winston Churchill
    ''Man can not remake himself without suffering for he is both the MARBLE and the SCULPTOR'' - Alexis Carrel
    ''The best views come from the hardest climbs''



    [​IMG]
     
    Denzel889 and Buddhabro like this.
  9. Don't lose heart. This was good advice.
     
  10. Lheastwoo

    Lheastwoo Fapstronaut

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    Hey man!

    If you don't read any other posts, please at least read this one! I promise to give you a light in this dark and shitty time!

    Let me weigh in a second.

    Lets avoid over simplifying the problem. mental disorders or difficulties rarely happen alone, many happen in unison (I.E. depression and anxiety etc. etc.)

    What you are experiencing is probably a form of self inflicted PTSD. Now, do not feel shame (at least try not to, it's not completely your fault), I doubt you set out to purposely do damage to yourself.

    I want to start of first by saying DO NOT IDENTIFY WITH YOUR STRUGGLE. You are not porn addiction, you are not ptsd, you are not depression! you are a human, and regardless of how far gone or fucked up you believe you are, you deserve love, compassion and kindness! I'm sorry you have not given that to yourself, or found someone to make you believe that you are worth those things. Please do not end your life, you are worth more then any of us know! I believe in you, and I know your struggle! We all have made mistakes, and if we judged everyone on there mistakes, we would all be horrible people!

    You have defined your sexuality as a problem. It is no wonder you feel yourself ASEXUAL at this point. If we think about neuroplasticity and what not, if we associate a negative feeling with an action enough times, the negative feeling will become involuntary. I doubt you can even engage in any sexuality without triggering an episode of despair and dread. your brain is double hijacked, by porn, and now by your negative affirmations.

    I'm here to tell you that even though you can't see the light, I promise that it is there.
    "if you only look for darkness, it is all you will ever see. if you look for the light, you can often find it."

    You can train yourself to unlearn this, I promise. You can feel clean and pure and learn to enjoy sexuality again.

    This will be hard, you self hate will hinder you, the disgust you feel will be there for a long time.

    But I promise, with the right steps, you will look back and feel immense pride for overcoming the demons in you. Do not try and reject your dark side. You must learn to live in peace with it. The stories of those heroes who never felt an evil thought itching in the back of there head are not real. Yin and yang must exist together.

    Your struggle getting worse is probably from you addressing your problem wrong. I would be more than willing to help, and would suggest professional help along with it. I myself see a professional regularly.

    I will be here for you if you need it. you message me any time of the day or night and I will get back to you as soon as I can. You are worth it.
     
  11. Denzel889

    Denzel889 Fapstronaut

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    @Fap_the_Fap Man keep up the good work. We are all with you in this. You are not alone. You must have faith. You just need time to recover. Perhaps lots of time and patience and healthy lifestyle. You will make it. Peace brother.
     
  12. I feel like you but my libido disappeared when my last guy left me. What is your reason? Deep inside i don't have libido because I don't want to deal with a guy who is going to hurt me again so I shut off. First time I don't have libido at all. It was unconscious but that is what meant for me. For months I used to lay in bed waiting to die honestly to just not feel anything but I was wrong. Life is beautiful and you deserve all the best, don't throw it away. Congrats on you 164 days. That's a great accomplishment, be proud of yourself. If you wanna talk you can send me a message. You are not alone, we are all on the same boat :)

    Have you tried to go on a date? How are you with girls? How old are you? For me I don't feel automatically turned on by guys but if I concetrate i can like if a guy is physically attractive. I assume your mind is being reprogrammed to see the other people not like a sexy body to shag. I can recommend to give yourself a push. Go on some dates, I am sure then you'll feel desire to have sex. It is in the human nature. I understand your concern and how frustrating that can be. You wanna get back to normal and you will
     

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