To have children, or not, or later?

One did. It can be rough, but I think I understand her better than my wife does. She read the books so she knows the techniques, but I feel the impatience, I experience it alongside my daughter and I can help her deescalate despite the neuro-chemical obstacles. I wasn't diagnosed until recently, and I still resent the fact that the process is the same as learning which Disney Princess you most resemble, but if I do have the same physical problems with neurotransmitters in the brain as the people they've studied in better detail, it explains a lot about my P addiction.

 

Why do you think only children turn out this way? Is it because they are spoiled rotten? Every only child I’ve ever known was always odd in some way, and I definitely know a socially awkward narcissist you speak of.

 

I have no idea. This is just based on a observation.

I have noticed that kids with siblings tend to be better with socializing but tend to do worse in academics than their peers. Whereas, only children tend to do better with academics but worse when it comes to socializing.

Of course, you can still have siblings and be an only child and do great at socializing and academics. But, what I have observed, only children tend to be more socially awkward than kids with siblings.

 

I think @Meshuga and @StarRider hit the nails on the head here, some of these responses make my head hurt haha. But I'm gonna be real, reading your post and your responses in this thread and the fact that you made this thread in the first place, it doesn't seem like anything about you genuinely wants children in any way shape or form more than you want certain things for yourself, which is perfectly fine. But there's enough kids on this planet with parents that aren't fully committed to them and just see them as the reason they had to put aside certain personal/career goals. It seems more like your friends are having kids and society generally places a status signal on having kids so you feel left out.

Another thing to consider is your thing seems to mostly center around you and its not really taking into account there is going to be a whole 'nother human being with their own perspective, thoughts, approach etc to children. So part of this really just depends on what woman you meet anyways. It's not completely uncommon to have a good partner that would not be a good parent or just doesn't want kids period. But to answer the question simply, I wouldn't have kids if by the time you're in a position to have kids, you're still mostly focused on yourself because that's the antithesis of raising a kid. Your reasons are a bit self interested imo and not really about having the potential joy to create and nurture a child that is yours, which again is perfectly fine. You just gotta be honest and ask yourself what you actually care about and figure out what things you only care about because you feel like you're supposed to care(I think almost everyone in a first world country has at least one thing here).

 

I don't mean to criticise you in particular, but this is yet again pure decadence speaking. You know a society is decadent when its crowds shout "my actions don't matter" in unisono.

Anyway, I'm not disappointed with you not willing to have children (although I do believe you're missing out big time), I'm pissed off with governments imposing social insurance on people in those decadent times...

 

Yeah, I get that. Frankly, having children and looking at them grow up is a joy in itself, it's not really about the long-term existential pursuits, although those matter a lot too.

As for the unpromising future - we've heard that since the beginning of Cold War (with far greater intensity and far more serious threats) and yet we're still alive and doing fine, so maybe we should keep our chin up more.

 

Yeah with that mindset it's probably a good idea not to have kids. Life has to matter. Little things, like the color of a cup, has to matter. You can't be Sartre raising a kid, that's a recipe for misery for everyone.

As for the future not looking promising, that's a lie fed to you by news media selling you headlines and governments selling you their authoritarian control. By any objective metric you can use, world hunger, average income/purchasing power, wars in progress, violence against women, straight violence period, access to healthcare, infant mortality, etc., we are living in the best times of history ever.

 

Do you realize that this entire “pandemic” was in fact a plandemic/ scamdemic? Do you really think that would be a part of “the best times in history ever?”

 

Well, a scandemic is better than an actual pandemic, isn't it. Think of the Black Death, for instance. Our times certainly aren't ideal, there's a lot of screwed up things, but this is precisely the reason why we shouldn't fail to reproduce - we need to pass on our convictions and willpower onto offspring so that it carries our good intentions forward. And if you think you "can't do anything about it", then I'm telling you you can. Perhaps my optimism stems from the fact that I come from a nation that single-handedly (not to mention some financing from CIA, probably) pushed the first block of the Warsaw Pact's grand domino causing the collapse of the Soviet Union that to many had appeared invincible. Even the grandest system will eventually collapse if its roots are rotten.

 

Point taken. I mean, I still strongly believe the destabilization of the US, at least the degree to which it is destabilized, is manufactured by a hysterical press. I know the pandemic has been hard on us financially, mentally, even morally. I know a few people who have died, a lot more who got sick. My wife works in health care, and she was physically assaulted multiple times for asking people to wear their masks. Some, I think, were like Chain, and thought of her as a faceless government lackey forcing a symbolic act of control on them. Others believed the virus was real, but genuinely did not care about other patients. That's a depressing thought to have. In some ways that's worse than the virus itself, because it's a choice they made to violently act against their own neighbor.
I don't know that it was planned, I do know a lot of people took unfair advantage of a crisis. I know the news was polarized along ideological lines almost instantly. When compared to other historic pandemics, though, the Black Death, the Spanish Flu, or smallpox, this is mild. This is yet another example of us not realizing how good we have it.

I disconnected from the news and social media (except for NoFap, sometimes) for other reasons, but I've found without that constant reminder that everyone is racist and everyone is sexist and everyone hates everyone else, I see that we're not. Most people are kind to strangers and while there are some things that suggest the sky is falling, I'm confident scientists will find yet another way to prop it back up again and that the governments are interested enough in self preservation that they'll allow it. I think we're going to be fine in the end.
Not that it can't get bad. The Nazis, the Soviets, the CCP, all perpetrated massive slaughter and incarcerations in the 20th century. We need to be on guard from egregious authoritarianism. I'm not naive enough to think it can't happen in the States, either. I have a relative by marriage that was incarcerated in Poston Arizona for no other crime than being Japanese. I don't think it will, though, and I don't think I'm bringing my kids into an apocalyptic hellscape.

I served in the US military, and people always tell me "Thank you for your service." I have always been uncomfortable with that because I did it for the college money, but now I say "Thank you for being worth serving," and that's presumptive of me but I mean it. I don't care if you consider yourself left or right, religious or free of superstition, and I don't care about the color of your skin or your collar. As long as you don't restrict the freedoms of your neighbor while still protecting your own person and property, you're good by me.

 

I don’t know what “like chain” means, but as far as I’m concerned.. that was exactly what she was doing.

Hahahah you really believe that don’t you?

Apparently you know that and yet still parrot their talking points that create nothing but division in order to uphold the facade of this fake pandemic. I can’t even begin to express how pathetic your line of thinking is. Here’s a thought,where your mask to protect yourself. Get your vaccine to protect yourself. Don’t expect others to restrict their breathing for the sake of satisfying your mental illness.

Thank you for giving me a good laugh first thing in the morning. I find it hilarious that you actually have no idea why this “pandemic” is not even comparable to those of the past. Let me help you out.. it’s because we live in 2021 where complex sewage systems, water filtration, and access to adequate nutrition exists. The severity of those pandemics will absolutely never happen again unless society completely collapses. The fact you can even use the words “other pandemics” as if this flu virus is even in the same category, is concerning. Claims to not watch the news- parrots every talking point on the news. Good sheep, carry on. Did you get your double vax like a good boy?

 

The American Government doesn’t care about its people at all. Whenever there is a crisis (with the exception of the Great Depression), the politicians always bail out the guys on Wall Street, not the people.

Every domestic/social issue has been ignored for decades.

 

And this year's prize for most efficient COVID warmonger goes to...

 

Uh no.. a fabricated pandemic created from a lab-raised virus utilized to bring about totalitarian measures and usher in the “new normal,” and vaccine passports is far from better than an actual pandemic. Which simply wouldn’t happen in 2021 when we have these things called sewage systems and cleanliness standards.

 

Depends how you look at it. I'd still much rather live now with COVID than in 14th century Western Europe. The COVID smells real bad of social engineering, I get that and smelled it from the very onset of this alleged "crisis", but wearing those stupid masks is not a burden really, no matter if you like it or not. Well, maybe I'm thinking that because I don't work/move often in public places.

*awaits being bashed for being a thoughtless sheep controlled by the Illuminati*

 

Look man... where has wearing those “stupid masks” got us? Now we have talk of needing 2 injections in your arm in order to enter places. Do you think that would even be a topic of conversation if people denied the masks to begin with? When do you put your foot down? Are you vaccinated for corona virus?

 

Don't know, don't care, don't read the news, not getting vaccinated.

 

Ah, so you are an idiot I see. When you get fired from your job for not getting vaccinated we’ll see if you care. Of course, I know that’s when your dumbass will just give in and get it. Because “who cares” right.

 

No, I'm a freelance translator working from home since 2012 so can I just pretty much not give a fuck about the outer world altogether. My only concern is when the different sectors of the industry go down and I lose assignments.

 

In my opinion anyone that wants to bring a child into this chaotic and twisted universe cannot be on their right mind. Sure, your DNA is screaming "aw, let's have kids, it's going to be hard, but it's natural and beautiful", but that's just your naturally ingrained fear of dying alone in the cold dead space talking.