This journal is going to be a little different Our purpose for this journal is two-fold. We want to do better as a couple, and we want what we learn to help others. So as we write our journey together, esperamos que ustedes esten juntos con nosotros. Of course, you must be wondering, why are you saying we? Well, we'll just come right out with it. I, letter, am not writing this alone. As I type each of these letters, I have the beautiful @White Sheep beside me. How we met is a story that she wants to tell. I am just sooooo happy to be with her. We want to do our best for each other and for our God. So, we'll both be writing here. Sometimes it will be just one of us. Sometimes we'll write something together as we're doing now. We'll try to make it clear who is writing when n_n Seee you!!
Yes, I want to tell the story. Of course, we first met here on Nofap. For those of you that have known us, you knew we were good friends. We talked a lot on Nofap and then out of Nofap. Then, without either of us knowing the other’s feelings, we began to fall in love, we realized that our feelings were mutual when we felt nervous to call each other. We knew the nervousness came from big feelings. We didn’t say anything but we both knew. Then letter had dreamed about us so he shared it with me and we decided to choose each other. Things went so well that we made our choice real, and letter came to meet me where I live. We spent a whole month together and our hearts felt reassured about the choice we made. The month ended so soon and letter had to go back to Canada because he had to prepare himself to stay here. Then the silly covid-19 came and we were separated without any idea of when we’ll be together again. We felt that we were not going to see each other any time soon but we had faith that God wanted us to be together. After 7 months, the time finally came!!! Now, here we are. I am super happy. There is so much I want to say, but later!
EEEHHH!!! It makes me so happy to see you guys together. I have wondered when I will hear from you again (speaking of which, I just sent you a reply not too long ago), but it makes me over the moon that you guys are finally together and that there is such happiness, such joy coming from you both. I hope to hear from you guys soon. It has been a while and I have missed you both so much. Now that you guys are together, I hope we can catch up because I need your advice and wisdom now more than ever, my dearest letter, and I also want to ask you some things and see if we can work on the stuff we have been meaning to do. My heart is over the moon for you guys. It is filled with such love and joy. I am eager for us to talk again soon!
Your excitment for us is a treasure, dear writer. Thank you so much. This is from both sheeps and I. This first week we've been together has just been sooo good. We both feel like what we share is soooooOOOooOOooOOooooo much better than anything PMO ever did for us. Of course, we still need to stand the test of time, but we feel strengthened by being together in this. One thing that has really helped us has been having someone we can be totally honest with. We don't hide from each other. Sometimes that has been difficult, but the intimicy that has created between us has been well worth everything we risked in vulnerability to build. We learned that as long as we set our hearts to decide on the right way to go, that following the course brings blessings. Even if we have to start from a very low place, as long as we're together and are on the same page about where we want to go, then the journey is a joy. So we wish for you to find what your heart needs to be eager to press onwards in this life, our dear writer. God bless you.
No problem! It makes me so happy to see that you guys find my excitement such a joy. Also, I loved the moon picture. How can I describe my feelings of you guys being together, in person, and seeing how much better it is than PMO? How can the writer's words capture these feelings of joy? I ask myself this since how can I find the words to describe you guys together? Speechless. That is my feeling right now. Speechless, but in a good way. It also makes me happy to know that the intimacy you guys have at the moment is deep and savors the challenges you guys have tackled together. I do want your hearts to follow each other and while I am not sure how deep your intimacy will go, I know that as long as you love God, he will love you. I can sense it in my bone. It comes in strong, much like the change in the wind or the wings of a dove. No one person starts off high. They work their way to the top and you both are brilliant examples of this! Yes, I want to find what my heart is eager for. Just seeing your happiness makes me long for someone to share my happiness with, to not weep tears of loneliness or isolation, but tears of love and affection. I want to find someone to share this with, but I am also scared of not knowing God's will. It is why I treasure you, my dearest letter and sheeps, because you guys give me a sense of security and a place to turn inward. I hope that you guys are blessed and that you can help me find my way again. I am lost on the path and I feel scared of not getting back to the place I was at before. However, I know that together, you guys can uplift me and return me to that place, much like a blackbird sweetly singing on the piano keys when they find their song.
Your words are always so precious to us @aspiringwriter1997 . I am happy you can share this joy with us. I hope in God that you will find someone as Letter found me and I found him. God bless you Writer, for being such a special person to us. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Yesterday I had a problem in the morning, with my lack of encouragement to do work, but my dear was there next to me to give me encouragement. I also got a problem with my classes and the internet went off in the middle of the class and, thank you God, my dear didn't leave earlier, he was there and helped me to solve the problem. In both situations, I used to go straight to PMO or MO but this time I was there with him, God put him there with me so his spirit lifts up mine. May God bless him for being such a man who makes me not have even a little thought of PMO or MO in my head when those triggers come to my life.
I am happy to know that my words are precious to you guys and maintain a special weight. I hope so. Please pray for me and if possible, guide me forward. You guys are really special to me. It makes me swell with joy knowing that your dear helped you fix the problems and was there for you! It is amazing how having someone you trust next to you in the present truly makes a difference. Keep going forward and may he make you stronger than ever before!
Day 46 But I'll talk about the day 30 ijijijij I am so happy that finally I am achieving the month. I am not sure but for what I remember, I haven't reached a month since the long streak I did here back when I logged in for the first time in Nofap, moore than 1 year ago. Now Letter is with me and we've spent so much time together that I don't have extra time to think on MO or PMO, but being honest, at the beginning to the middle of the streak was being a little difficult and some urges come from time to time but I feel that now are easy to defeat. Thank you God for Letter, thank you God for giving me this strength to continue further away.
You’re doing well dear. You were always able to do this. God is with you as He is with me. Together I feel like we are able to be more like ourselves, or more of ourselves. I know that for me, I don’t feel like I have to try as hard to be myself. I feel more like me around you, and that helps so much. I don’t feel weird. Or sad. Or hopeless. The me who can rise up and defeat this addiction feels freer. I feel it’s the same for you. I’m so happy to see you’re doing well. I knew you could do this. I’m so happy to be a part of it
Thank you so much for your words dear. I am so happy that we feel the same way. I know God is with us <3
Uhhh we melt hearts :3. What a sweet caramel of hearts ijiji _________________ I just want to say that we are very happy together. Our love is very strong and I thank God for letting us be together and share our lifes. We can see each other very often he lives 4 houses far from my house. We can chat after work. We can have meals togheter. Letter is so special. Despite I've been relapsing lately he understands me and we understand each other <3
Waaahhh. You've pulled at my heartstrings so much you guys. It's melting with pure love and joy. Awww <3
We've had so long without updating this journal. We've gone through many things, but now our love has been growing a lot. We feel more bond to each other and we support each other more and more. I used to think that I didn't want a significant other in my life while I was with this addiction, but I've come to understand that PMO is not everything, in the sense that you shouldn't give it so much attention to the point to think that PMO is a curse on you and that you are less worth because of it. We still have this problem with us, but it surely doesn't define what we are. We have improved a lot from abstaining from it. We still struggle and little by little we will defeat it in Jesus' name. I know God is with us. We have been reassured by Him to be together and God willing, PMO won't be a stone in our way to Him and honor Him. I relapsed last week, but I want to do better for God and my dear. - The Sheeps
Amen It's been very helpful to have someone like the sheeps to be with me on this journey. We tell each other everything. I haven't been on here so much these days to keep up with everything, but she knows every time I've relapsed (speaking of which, my counter is totally inaccurate right now...) That helps, so much. We don't judge each other but help to pick each other up and get back on track. Not having to hide anything is very freeing. We're beating this, poco a poco. On another note, I've noticed in myself a bit of a change. Ever since I started pursuing the sheeps, long ago in 2019, I've grown to be more careful with my life. When I was on my own, I didn't think much of taking risks. But now, I want to be sure that I am doing what I know I need to do to make our lives beautiful. It's been a struggle in a lot of ways for me, but it's starting to look better and better. I noticed that just holding down a job was taking a lot out of me and it was difficult to progress towards the various other goals I had, like learning Spanish and developing a career that will allow for more free time. Granted, my job has been tough. But I've stuck with it and made changes, like switching from an evening shift to a morning shift. I'm sleeping better, bit by bit, and am just now starting to feel like I can do more things to move life forward. I guess I'm saying that this is the effect that my dear sheeps has had on me. She's been with me through everything and has been incredibly supportive and understanding <3 I look forward to growing together with her more and more.
Waah, you're so sweet. You know how my heart's exactly like and this pulled at my strings. :3 I'm glad to hear that you've undergone a change and have grown to be more careful with your life. It makes me happy to see you have such a steady presence with the sheep and having someone that can help you every step of the way. Yes, while it may be difficult at times, having someone there to help you through does make a world of difference. It's nice to know that you're beginning to see life beautifully and that you're striving to move forward. Give it some time and everything will fall into place. It's nice to have an effect one person causes. It gives us a purpose not to relapse or sin because we want all of our love for them alone. Now if I only had someone just as amazing as the sheep for me.
Ah dear, you are special and I am always going to be thankful for what you are doing for us. Your efforts are amazing and lovely. God bless you! <3