Too much fap in the past ruining current sex life?

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by wrapbeforetap, Jul 17, 2018.

  1. wrapbeforetap

    wrapbeforetap Fapstronaut

    Hello everyone. I am fairly new to the whole new fap thing and I believe it may be just what I needed; I am otherwise really fit and healthy despite these performance issues. I am 22 now and since I was 12, I have been chronically masturbating day in and day out. I believe that this has caused me to have severe performance anxiety. a physical problem that I faced over 10 years is that the shape of my penis actually turned flat over the years of vigorous, fast and hard masturbation and I am afraid that this may affect me severely. I lost virginity in November 2016 and it was kind of bad in a way, I only stayed hard for a several seconds before going limp inside a woman and those days, I was still masturbating constantly. Fast forward to January 2018, I had sex again and pretty much the same thing happened as last time, I went limp real quick but I actually stopped masturbating 2 days before and I still went limp quick.

    Now fast forward this June 2018, I stopped masturbating for 8 days straight and had the best sex I have had, but it is still not as good as average I believe. I was actually able to keep an erection for an entire 30 minutes and was able to have intercourse all sorts of different positions and I felt great about that mentally but I never felt much stimulus on my penis and I was never able to finish or climax during intercourse but instead, this girl finished me off with her hand and that's when I had an orgasm and finished. Now this month of July, I went 10 days without masturbating and had intercourse again, and although it wasn't as good as the last one as I was limp at first, I was able to get it up after and still perform but poorly and we never reached a climax at all and that makes me feel bad and when she eventually used her hands, they got too sore and it didn't end well; I don't really watch porn but I did lots on that same day before intercourse. Longest I've went with nofap was probably about 20-25 days before I knew what nofap was and since I knew, it was just 10 days. I keep relapsing and edging but I started over again yesterday and wish to continue for at least 6 months, which is my ultimate goal.

    Now my questions are:

    1. Is there hope through nofap that I one I will be able to climax during intercourse despite over 10 years of excessive masturbation and even changing the shape of my penis to a flatter shape? I am just so saddened that I can never finish when having intercourse and I feel doomed.

    2. Is it true that delayed ejaculation mean that you have multiple sclerosis or anything very serious or in my case, is it just the excessive masturbation?

    3. What else can I do to better myself and finally reach climax during intercourse?

    I want to say thank you for your time and help.
  2. Yes. Many here report success.



    Don't masturbate. Especially don't look at porn.
    wrapbeforetap likes this.
  3. wrapbeforetap

    wrapbeforetap Fapstronaut

    Thanks for the help; gives me hope and I also hope to come back and share results. I promise to achieve my personal goals of 6 plus months of that!
  4. wrapbeforetap

    wrapbeforetap Fapstronaut

    June 19/2019 update: I did it! Although I never went on NoFap for longer than 70 days as I kept screwing up and relapsing (I normally relapse within a week or a couple of months), I still managed to perform well during intercourse today and actually reach climax and nut inside someone real hard during missionary sex position; it happened fairly quick too and less than 30 minutes during the entire interaction of just causally talking and getting to the actual fun part of course. I apologize if it sounds like bragging but I am glad to say that there is hope even with all the problems that I have as described here on this thread.

    The take away is that nofap saved me and it can save you too in these situations. You don't have to go on a crazy 300+ day streak or whatever in order perform normally during sex but it sure helps at least cutting down on masturbation. Cheers and I hope this helps anyone who went through the same thing!
  5. Always be positive

    Always be positive Fapstronaut

    wrapbeforetap likes this.
  6. wrapbeforetap

    wrapbeforetap Fapstronaut

    Thanks and I will take a look. I made a hardcore promise to do nofap for 1 year straight started August 15/2019 and I'll get all the help I need.
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  7. Chappie77

    Chappie77 Fapstronaut

    Hi wrapbeforetap,
    I hope you get to read this.
    It's been a long time since I thought about trying to save myself.
    I had pretty much given up hope.
    But I want a normal life.

    I have delayed ejaculation that I believe was caused from masturbation practices I started in puberty and continued throughout my adult life.
    I've only ever ejaculated through normal penis in vagina thrusting three times.
    two of these times were from marathon vigorous sex that broke us and was physically and mentally exhausting.
    I then started to finish myself by hand after I thought my partner had enough.
    Every relationship ended up short term and in failure.
    This led to me from not being able to sustain relationships to actively avoiding them.
    But I would always keep up the porn and the masturbation that was too hard and fast.

    I've had women at work asking me out.
    And I rejected them.
    Worse thing is I fancied them back.
    But all I could see was anything started been doomed by failure and awkwardness.
    Now seeing these women meet partners and have children is very hard for me.
    It could of been me. except for my condition.

    I've been trawling the success thread looking for hope but not finding anything on delayed ejaculation.
    This is the first thread about it I've read.
    I actually registered hoping you could help.
    I hope you read this and don't mind me asking a couple of questions.

    What has been your relationship status throughout your recovery?
    Do you think you're cured?
    Did you go hardmode throughout?
    How long do you have to thrust for before you ejaculate?
    Is the thrusting particularly vigorous?

    I know these are deeply personal questions and I fully understand if you don't want to answer them.
    Anyway I'm still going to try my damnest to go harmode for 90 days.
    wrapbeforetap likes this.
  8. wrapbeforetap

    wrapbeforetap Fapstronaut

    Hey Chappie77!

    Sorry I am not on the computer most of the time and I am sorry you are going through a hard time as well. I am glad to answer questions.

    "What has been your relationship status throughout your recovery?": I've been single throughout my entire recovery status and been doing one night stands through escorts mostly basically; I've been single since February 2016.

    "Do you think you're cured?": Yes I do know and believe that I am cured. Ever since that June post I made, I've been with one girl 3 times and another one and all four times, I was able to ejaculate easily and even too quickly at this point throughout normal intercourse

    "Did you go hardmode throughout?": I absolutely did not. I watched porn occasionally, edged a lot and even got handjobs, etc. from women.

    "How long do you have to thrust for before you ejaculate?" Honestly at this point, not very long at all and in fact I honestly without a shadow of lie, went to the complete opposite where I would actually ejaculate faster than average. I went from Delayed ejaculation to premature ejaculation. I'd say my first ejaculation after intercourse after the one I noted here in June was about 3-7 minutes and I was going slow too and very relaxed too from kneeling upright missionary while she lays on her back.

    "Is the thrusting particularly vigorous?" Not at all! I like to go slow, soft and sweet at this point since I really have recovered and I now cum fast. I only thrust vigorously once I feel like the point of no return and I want to cum.

    I do believe that you can recover like me and wish you the best. I don't mind answering any questions at all as I like helping people out. Ask any time!
    Chappie77 likes this.

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