too much viewing, not enough doing

T

thatlldo82

New Fapstronaut
Well... I suppose I should start by describing my situation.
I don't spend a horrible amount of time watching porn. It's been a long time since I went on a several hour binge (when I was in a long term relationship). However, I do tend to PMO most nights. It's normally a short lived affair, often to compilation videos. I'm certain this custom adds to PE problems that wrecked my sex life for the last few years (!) of my relationship and several of the sexual encounters that have followed that breakup.
I find myself regularly passing up potential sex and fail to approach girls, even when I think they look interested in me. I'm sure this comes down in part to the safety net of porn, where I can get my fix with no risk of embarrasment.
I'm in my early 30s now and don't want to let this time slip away in front of a screen.
I'm going to set my initial goal as 1 month without looking at any porn. I will allow myself to masturbate and/or edge. When I am in a situation where I'm having regular sex, I will cut this out too.
I'm glad to join this community and hope that I can both support and be supported by the other members here.
Thanks for reading, it feels good to have written this stuff down.
 
Welcome. When describing yourself you pretty much described us all. Three things I tell people here, and I often respond with big posts, but not now: get educated, use tools that are available (porn blockers are helpful), and expect, anticipate, and want withdrawals, because you are not quitting PMO without them.

Education:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_RIm9ZMN1I

I quit the PMO cycle within a few days of understanding what my problem was. Before that I thought I could quit it on my own. If you think you are ready to quit it on your own, you are not ready to quit it.

There are two types of guys here, in my opinion; the guys who think they can control porn, and the guys who know porn controls them. I am in the last category. I can't control it, knew it controlled me, and had to get rid of it. You will have to decide which side you are on. The guys who come here and think they control the porn in their lives think its a bit out of control, they still want to use it, but they are looking for ways to keep it in their lives. Those guys will never be PMO free. They might cut back for long periods, but due to the nature of the addiction, it is impossible to keep porn in your life and beat the addiction. Impossible. I could say tons more, but I am not going to. I will say that ED is the biggest reason guys are here quitting porn; had a touch of it myself, which motivated me to quit. And the thing about having a fetish or preferring a category is one of the things associated with pornography addiction; we all start out on two beautiful people having sex and progress to more shocking porn as our brains require more of it to produce the dopamine we love. Dopamine is the greatest drug ever created, porn causes its release, and it's 100% in our heads. It's a miracle not everyone is addicted.

Good luck to you on your journey. You need to start learning about your problem. I encourage you to do so.
 
Hi William,

Thanks for your response. I'm actually here thanks to that video. I'd seen it a few months ago, had a couple of P free weeks, loved it, but then went back to old ways anyway and seemed to forget about what I knew was right. Recently I decided to watch it again and this time thought I'd check out the NoFap to see if it would encourage me to stick at it with more commitment.
Could I ask what you've found most rewarding about your experience quitting (or to point me towards any particularly good posts that outline the benefits people have experienced)?
Thanks again for your support!
 
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