Trying to get to the root. Need advise

Addictions are caused by a number of factors. IMHO, at the root is your brains desire for Dopamine. It is tricking you subconsciously into thinking if it doesn't get it's fix it's going to "die." That same kind of feeling was probably experienced as a child. Our caregivers weren't always there when we needed them. If you didn't get acceptance, if you were not loved, you might have felt you would "die." Now that your older, most all of these thoughts takes place below a conscious level, so you're not even aware of it.

I can't answer your question on who to tell. If you feel comfortable with telling your parents, by all means go ahead, but IMHO, only do it if it will help. If they are the source of your pain, I would carefully consider if you want to go that route. Personally, I wouldn't do it. If you have people that have hurt you deeply, then I suggest finding some closure by forgiving them. That doesn't mean you don't acknowledge the hurt... which is definitely real... It means you give up the right to retaliate over past pain.

I would suggest finding someone you can trust.. an AP from here works fine, a pastor or counselor. Then work through the issues. I believe you're on the right track. You may never understand the underlying root, but recognizing that your triggers are coming from deep within you is a great way to leverage your recovery.

 

Did you get bad comments in this community?

 

Addiction is caused by multiple reasons, but here's the kicker - addiction is not always about a bad childhood and your childhood may have nothing to do with your addiction. You should see a therapist, they are an objective third party and you will accomplish more with a therapist than you will by just talking to your parents. Talk to your parents to if you think it will help.
Good luck.

 

HELLO! I reccommend a very powerfull book if you want to get down to the nitty gritty with ANY habits, it helped me dissect my behaviors and put a stop to my bad habits
This book gave me a really big push foreward to self improvement it is called "the power of habit"
Hopefully it can help you with your bad habit of PMO. GOODLUCK!

 

If you want to read one that will scare the daylights out of you try...
Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes