Hello everyone, I'm taking a shot with this community and philosophy. All my life I have been a slave of my urges... fortunately I do not do drugs or drink alcohol, but ironically I'm not "clean" of bad habits. I have addictions to porn, masturbation, videogames and internet... oh, and sugar. Some people have told me that those things are not so serious, I don't know how right are they, but all my life I've been strugling to drop those habits of my life. I am a very anxious person, and altough I'm not diagnosed with depression, I feel sadness and anxiety all days of my life. It's a struggle to mantain composure, but I have the hope that all those bad feelings are things I can change or at least diminish with the right effort. I do not think that I will be someone important, i've screwed up big time in the past, throwing away good oportunities to improve my life just because I felt good with the instant gratification that my bad habits gave me... BUT my dream is to just be a master of myself, to control my urges and to have a strong willpower to do anything... I do really do not expect to be rich, or famous... I just want control over myself. I am a lonely man, I have the fortune to have a family and right now a girlfriend that makes my days happier enough. But I know that if I can't change my ways, I will lose them or make their life more complicated. I simply do not want that. The videogames are so easy to find and win, the give me distraction from my daily problems. I just made my life more difficult thanks to games like League of Legends and Minecraft... well, maybe the correct way to say it is: I ruined my life because I prefered those things over the important ones. The masturbation and porn gave me the sexual pleassure just needed to not feel miserable being alone in my days as a single person. Now that I have a girlfriend, I've discovered that our sex doesnt give me enough satisfaction, and she notices it. But I love her and want to feel good having sex with her, and want to satisfy her as well. I often masturbate to women that I meet and feel attracted to, I do think that this is normal, but damn, not if a fap more than 4 times a day. I often feel like a stupid child toying my wanger in my bed... I'm a full grown man now, but this is an habit that just happens almost unconscioussly now. The internet... god, I love the internet, I have meet good people with it, I have learn a lot of things, I have a bast vision of the world thanks to it, I like programming and want to make good things with my knowledge, I want to create things on the web, I want to improve human life with all the knowledge in here... but... I just end up watching stupid youtube videos, scrolling facebook main page, watching my recently verified email, chatting with my videogame friends... i feel just stupid, because maybe the things I do are harmless and good sometimes... but at the same time they are unproductive and are not what I really want to do, are just a response I have when im bored. Thanks to all those bad habits, I feel distracted all the time, I have good plans to improve my life one step at a time... but I delay every single step just for one more moment of fun playing games... or just a moment of pleasure with that hot girl inserting a huge dildo in her vagina just in front of her cam... or I want to check things on my game guild as I can't quit... because if I quit I will lose my internet friends. Today I had a boost of will-power and uninstalled my videogames, removed all the shorcuts to facebook, youtube, etc... uninstalled some distracting apps from my phone. But that's not the first time I did something like this. So, I do not know how much I will last. So... yeah... I will take a shot with this. If you've read this far, thanks.