Two months of freedom. Guide and discussion.

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Vergil_S

Fapstronaut
Here are some tools that help me achieve 2 months free of porn. And also some questions worth thinking.

My Tools for quitting porn:
  1. Attach meaning: Rarely can a man commit to a less meaningful goal, such as boosting streak number. I'm doing this for my future lover and family, and I'm willing to commit anything to this cause. (My goal is to be healed from PIED, and build a loving relationship and family upon that. I don't believe in nofap magic: a myth stating that nofap will make you into a gigachad that women hit on literally on the street. Your goal might be different, but clarify it and write it down)
  2. Ritual of deleting my carefully curated porn archive. It is a ritual to tell myself that there is no going back. I used to hide my drive in the garage, so I could stop on my walk there, but it wasn't enough.
  3. Journaling. It is not easy. Journaling rewards me by recognizing it as an achievement. As noted in my journal, my previous relapse after 5 months is partially due to my previous website, YBRB's shutdown.
Other discussions:

I used to believe 99%+ men watch porn, but after acquiring good friends with deep communication, I found out that four of them have quitted porn for years, and had improved their sexual performance and energy. Porn is NOT a default way of life.

Science behind porn addiction:

Mentality
  1. Recovery is one step at a time process. Small wins are wins too. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
  2. For both porn and snack, I notice it is much easier to quit completely than to limit the volume. My craving went away at the 3-week mark. (I was addicted to video games before my sophomore year in college when I accumulated 2000+ hours on League of Legends. My conclusion is that I can be deeply addicted, but also can quit by complete abstinence).
  3. Treat yourself as someone who you are responsible for helping. Most people are self-loathing because of their acknowledgment of their failure and despicable deeds. Love and care for yourself despite the shameful past.

Inspirations
  1. If you are going through hell, keep going.
  2. We all wish we started it when we are younger, but today is the youngest we'll ever be.
  3. No old person regrets not watching no porn before they die.


Full Journal:
V

Post in thread 'Breaking Free from the Slavery of Pornography and PIED'

Day 50:

Streak alive. I'm proud of myself for making it this far, in harsh winter when I have almost no opportunities to meet new girls let alone to date.

I'm focusing on 3 hobbits:
slightly more difficult reading, Gym. Goal: 185# bench press. I can do 155# right now and 165# on a good day. marksmanship.
  • Like
 
PIED concerns and experiences:
  1. Positional ED: Most virgins had only M while sitting and lying, thus it's hard and weird for them to hold an erection (or ejaculate) in a standing or kneeling position. I trained myself to do that by getting an erection and then M while kneeling, which took me many attempts to learn.
  2. Stress: Stress and PIED issues usually occur together. They are not mutually exclusive causes of ED. I also discourage one from attempting one-night-stand sex with unattractive women to get exercise because of the higher likelihood of failing, which would make this anxiety problem worse.

Physical concerns and aids:
  1. Health: Please go to a doctor to make sure that you are fairly healthy first. Otherwise, this doubt will be hanging there silently. (age, smoking, drinking, and obesity can all contribute to physical ED)
  2. Pills: Strongly encouraged to be used before sex to assist while rebooting. (Auxiliary. PIED is no easy challenge, anything helps).
  3. I take some multi-vit and L-Tyrosine for health and recovery. There was no noticeable improvement in my recovery or negative side effects. But I will keep consuming it for health's sake.
  4. Condom: finding the right size and thickness helps a lot. Small or uncomfortable condoms impede sex noticeably.
  5. Flatline: I experience minor flatlines after being abstinent: weaker erection and less morning wood and no spontaneous erection. Mine isn’t as server as that of others (no depression or complete noodling).
  6. Morning Wood AKA Sleep-related erection. It only happens during REM sleep, so if you sleep for say 9hr on the weekend, you might not notice it because you are unlikely to know that you are in REM Sleep.
  7. Spontaneous Erection: Also much less since passing mid-20s.
  8. TRT: I naively claimed that it improves sexual health and muscle with little drawback, after some research and calling the clinic I found out that this is wrong! Traditional TRT (direct testosterone injection) negatively impacts fertility by reducing the natural production of testosterone. So one needs to consider it carefully. Price: quite expensive ina local clinic (few hundred per month), and cheaper online. However, the self-injection can introduce hygiene concerns. Enclomiphene is a new drug to facilitate natural T production. Online clinic is about 200/mo. However, my T level of 600 is already healthy, and unlikely to improve.
  9. Venous Leakage DIscussion: It is an illness caused by blood draining out of the penis too fast. It can be caused by aging, obesity, and smoking. It is rare for young healthy men and often misdiagnosed (quoting the doctor above). However, there is a member of the Nofap community who had this problem and fixed it with an implant. I rule it out for myself because I could M (with fantasy or porn) for a long time in a kneeling position. My problem is the lack of dopamine and stress. I also have morning wood (REM Sleep erection).
 
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This is really good overview of what to do and what you'll experience. I can attest to all of this, well certainly points 1 - 7.
It looks like you've covered it in your journal, but the bits that have really helped me are great nutrition, meditation, no alcohol, and more exercise.
All of them have helped keep my brain in a really stable place.
 
Emergency Technique
  1. command yourself to do something else, use the bathroom or do 20 pushups, it will direct your attention elsewhere. It’s much easier than to continuously command yourself to not do something for say 2 hours till you are in sleep.
  2. Say it out loud. Same as Ronnie Coleman yelling "lightweight". Speech and thoughts are feedback loops. If you say out loud: "I'm not a porn-addicted loser!" five times, it will affirm your resolve to not watch porn.
 
Benefit??

My will power had became stronger. I got to gym 3-4 times a week for years, after 2 years of training, my progressed had totally stopped for a year, im not able to break through a strength threshold.

Recently, after quitted porn for few months, my strength started to grow again, i can command myself to do 2-3 more when my muscle is fatigued.
 
Thank you for your insight. I’m currently in a month long flatline w weak MW and sluggish libido/energy in general but my mood is fine. Did yours improve?
 
sangriha said:
Thank you for your insight. I’m currently in a month long flatline w weak MW and sluggish libido/energy in general but my mood is fine. Did yours improve?
Click to expand...

I never dip into deep flatline. I think it is mostly lack sexual stimulus compared to infinite porn, you will get used to that soon and recovers.
 
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