This is my first post and I just wanted to share my thoughts.. Until recently I had never considered porn as a genuine addiction as I could not see the problems it causes. I thought of it as like being addicted to exercise.. its natural, healthy and makes you feel better, right? Well clearly (now) it turns out that's not so true. What woke me up to this is when I realised I was using it to 'escape' my reality, to temporarily 'check out,' to plug in and turn off whatever was going on in my mind or body. Having committed to this I am slightly concerned with what I have been avoiding.. as it seems to be coming to the surface. My dad has cancer and since starting my journey it has been more difficult to deal with the pain of it. Now it seems I actually feel emotions as physical pain in a way I did not before, or perhaps I was numbing it without really realising. As I wasn't really aware I was doing this I feel like I'm waiting for the next thing I was trying to escape from to hit me, which adds another level of apprehension to it.