Unmotivated to continue

I'm at a point right now where I don't feel as though I have enough reason to put in the effort and go through this intense discomfort that comes with nofap. I know that it is ultimately better for me but the benefits don't feel like enough for me to be motivated to quit. I've done all the self-improvement stuff; I go to the gym 4 times a week, I joined a dance team, learned how to cook, etc.

I think at this point the biggest motivating factor would be helping find a partner and developing a healthy relationship with her but I guess I'm feeling jaded about the prospect of finding someone. I just don't have any hope that I will find someone who is right for me. I feel pretty broken mentally and emotionally and I don't think it would even be right for me to enter into a relationship like that.

Not really sure what the point of writing this is but that's just how I've been feeling recently.

 

Yeah it's all a weird mental battle. I first found YBOP like 3 or 4 years ago and I was super motivated back then. I had several 3ish month streaks back to back but the longer I fight this war the less motivation I have to put into fighting. Not to say I haven't improved because I certainly have but it's really hard to see a future completely free of PMO.