Hey Beymybest, Thank you for sharing and opening up with your vulnerability - what an amazing place to work from. I used to feel depressed and lonely and down on myself. Meditation is the absolute most powerful cure to transform these feelings and heal definitively. When you meditate you learn to not identify with negative feelings or thoughts and release them before they take a hold on you. Most women are looking for men they can relate to. You sound like a really special person. See this moment in your life as an opportunity for you to get your shit together, and learn how to fall in love with yourself first. When you change the way you see things the things you see will change too. Life will engage with you. Once you deal with your self esteem, you will also become more magnetic. Otherwise, get more active, motivate yourself to do a hobby, be social if you can, get fit, whatever you can to channel your energy in positive and constructive ways. Burning physical energy also helps your mental energy stay clean and raises your self esteem. Go for it bro! S.