Voyeurism & Voyeuristic disorder - A Surprisingly Rarely Discussed topic on here!

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Better As a Quitter, Aug 26, 2020.

  1. So, I hope this thread gets a lot of responses and many people would share their experiences on this, in relation to pornography and masturbation addictions; because surprisingly this topic isn't discussed enough on the forum, and also in researches, there's minimal research done relating voyeurism to porn use, which honestly i find weird because basically porn is just conditioning the brain to voyeurism, (watching others engaging in sexual activities), so i would easily expect heavy users of porn would find voyeurism or at least voyeuristic tendencies also gratifying.

    This thread might be a bit long, but i hope the topic is interesting enough that you would read it to the end, i intend to summarize the definition of voyeurism a little, then share briefly my story with this (i.e my symptoms of the voyeuristic tendencies), then ask some questions that i don't have the answers to, that worry me and that will be open for discussion, so here we go..
    Voyeuristic disorder is a paraphilic disorder. There are several such disorders, with paraphilic referring to sexual interests, preferences, fantasies, urges, and behaviors outside the norm. These are considered symptoms of a disorder only if they are acted upon in ways that have the potential to cause distress or harm to oneself or others, especially non-consensual others.
    Definition according to DSM 5:
    The individual normally experiences sexual arousal when spying intentionally on unsuspecting people.
    The person being watched may be naked, disrobing, or engaging in sexual activities.
    The voyeur may also record these acts for later viewing.
    Unintentional viewing of such acts is not considered voyeuristic disorder.

    I watched porn since i was 15 years old, after some heavy use of porn, that added fetishes to my preferences that i hadn't have had before, i found out that i had a neighbour who would go around partially naked in her house, i used to look through my window and masturbate to this, i never recorded it, and would've done that, for me this was like the heating process that would eventually lead to watching porn and masturbating, then i moved to another apartment and found myself falling into a similar situation, all incidences that i acted this way was from my house, i never went around the streets looking for unsuspecting others partially naked, and i generally never look lustfully at women outside, i despise that, i've been in recovery for 2 years now, falling a lot, but one month ago i decided to take this seriously, been doing easy mode for a month and yesterday i changed to hard mode. Abstaining from porn for the last month had left me no option for sexual stimulus but the window looking out for partially naked people in their homes, instagram and facebook, i found myself constantly going to that window and compulsively checking instagram stories for someone sharing somehow sexy pictures of themselves, yesterday i read about voyeurism and realized that i engaged in this behaviours multiple times, i was really shocked by how this addiction damaged me, and i really amn't a pervert in my ordinary life, i had a meltdown, i called my accountability partner and shared with him, i'm better now, he advised me to delete my instagram account which i did, only use facebook for academic uses, and close that window with a lock and give the key to a trusted one, which i also did, i'm better emotionally and regardless of my past i'm fighting this addiction.
    My question now is that i'm freaking out a little over this, is this something that any of you experienced in some way? i would love to hear your experiences, also is this a porn related thing that diminishes with time and the rewiring process of the brain from porn culture to healthy sexual culture? has any of you had similar tendencies that disappeared after rewiring ? or is it an unrelated problem that will need it's own recovery and i will have to worry about it even after the reboot?
    i know recovery in general is a life long thing, i agree on that, but my question is do i need something other than recovery from porn to solve this or will it go away with just sticking to porn addiction recovery?

    I KNOW: THAT WAS LONG ESPECIALLY ON PHONES ! :D :D but i really need help with this, thank you for reading this far .. hope this spreads as it's really an under-discussed topic in the sense of porn and masturbation addiction.
    Have a good day, folks.
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2020
  2. thinking_differently

    thinking_differently Fapstronaut

    It’s normal yes. Nothing very unusual.
    Everybody on this forum(And a good number of the Humans breathing rn are!)
    I had a bad habit of peeping into the streets from my window.
    My neighbours have Various Photocopying Facilities, And also run Classes, so when parents would come to meet them, I would stealthily peek from the window, And Perform Oscillations.

    This very Idea is ingrained into our minds because of
    1. P
    2. Hollywood Movies(You know which Movie I’m specifically talking about if you follow Hollywood)
  3. I do follow Hollywood :D , but what movie are you referring to, i'm curious .. :D
    Yeah,i can easily imagine a porn addiction turning into this (as an escalating fetish, maybe) , but my last question is my most important one.. does people who had this issue find it go away when they stick to nofap .. or does it need a separate type of therapy??
  4. thinking_differently

    thinking_differently Fapstronaut

    It’s about LUST.
    You understand Lust, once you understand how to Handle lust, the problem of Sex addiction is almost solved.

    Good you aren’t sure about it. No need to discuss about it.
    See, this is where the mindset needs to change. You need to diminish/extinguish that Feeling of excitement on hearing something that can be Sexually exposing. This is sexual obsession. All of us are obsessed with it, we need to change that, we will.

    Stay aware man.
    You got this. :)
  5. Thanks, DUDE .. you're right ;)
    thinking_differently likes this.

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