Watching pornstars

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Megasameru, Aug 25, 2019.

  1. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Hey. I came across the idea of, hypothetically, watching youtube videos of pornstars (SFW videos), maybe talking, or being themselves, or being interviewed, as a part of a porn addiction reboot, as it may lead us to think of them more as human beings.

    Althought, I read a post of a guy (very religious) who said he ended up masturbating to pornless videos of pornstars, telling himself it was ok because it wasnt porn.

    I really get the point where it can lead to relapse. I actually had cravings for searching a video of her talking, but I knew it wouldnt make me any good.

    But anyway I think it would be an interesting subject of investigation, at least for people feeling fine in their 90+ days reboot.

    What do you guys think? Personally, for the time I'd not do it, since I recognize its my addictive brain.
     
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  2. Strijder

    Strijder Fapstronaut

    That part is really good ! For people who just started I think seeing pornstars is already too triggering. Later in the process it can be a good thing however it may be dangerous too. So it’s an dangerous experiment ;). Everything is at stake.

    On the other hand I do also think that if your "healed", you are no longer concerned with this. At that moment you know what the truth is. You don't need them to find the truth.
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2019
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  3. Daxos

    Daxos Fapstronaut

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    I really recommend against it. your brains is smarter than you know, and you just viewing her outside of porn will already fire up your porn pathways because it is a wonderful lead for your addiction to get a hold on and make you desire to fall back into your addiction. Trust me, don't do it. Go outside and talk to real girls.
     
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  4. Encernia

    Encernia Fapstronaut

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    Just tried it and I'm 14 days in. Wouldn't recommend it hahah luckily didnt relapse
     
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  5. allitnam

    allitnam Fapstronaut

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    If you get to do it, dont look for girls who are still working on the bussiness. Instead of, seek for people who have gotten rid of that life, they talk with the truth and they speak about the cruelty of that business. In my fisrt days, that helped me a lot as I could hold a reason to not support that porn industry anymore, when I understood how many lives they are ruining.
     
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  6. Lilla_My

    Lilla_My Fapstronaut

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    Maybe it's healthier to leave that world altogether. For example, drug addicts can get really excited just looking at drug paraphernalia. Their brains associate bongs, needles, pill bottles, even certain friends and places, with use. Perhaps just give the brain a healthy rest and focus on real people and real situations.

    Some men also seem to almost bond with porn actresses, thinking they somehow have a real place in their lives, which they do not. In fact, she doesn't know her viewers, she doesn't want to know these men, their involvement in her life is only made possible because of money. It is an unnatural one sided and non-existent "relationship" and a person with any sense of self perseverance should stay away from it.
     
  7. Tao Jones

    Tao Jones Fapstronaut

    Came her to say basically what @Lilla_My just wrote, so I will just say that this behavior for me would be a reset, because anything connected with the world of P is a P-sub and thus, for me, equivalent in my brain to P. I want to have nothing to do with that world any longer. I know that I could go right back into the pit if I skate along the edge of it too long or too often. Why do that? Instead, I will stay well back from the edge and not go anywhere near it.
     
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  8. Strijder

    Strijder Fapstronaut

    That's the best thing you can do.

    Still I'm curious how some ex addicts can handle "normal use". I know they are rare and that it must be damn hard but I'm curious how they manage it. That's a bit the question: stays an ex-addict always addicted to the product or is it just that it's too easy to fall back?
     
  9. Tao Jones

    Tao Jones Fapstronaut

    Does it matter which it is? Either way, the chance to go back into the swamp is simply too great.

    As for the idea of "normal use," there is no such thing. The only normal amount of P is zero.
     
  10. staticboy

    staticboy Fapstronaut

    Couldn’t agree more. Go get yourself some real people. And don’t fear rejection. See a girl, just say hi. If you get chatting then great. If you don’t then no harm done, just smile, say goodbye and move on. Plenty more women to say hello to. Like nearly 4 billion of them! Definitely definitely definitely at least one of them is going to think you’re awesome ;)

    Sorry, I digress though, because that wasn’t the question asked by @Megasameru.

    Personally, my P habits did’t (and from now on, will never) include an interest in porn stars. Of course I’ve come across named actors/actresses but was never interested as most seemed to adopt artificial ideals of sexualised beauty, e.g., fake breasts, big lips, etc. So could I watch them in a non-sexual documentary? Yes. Would it trigger me? No. But as @allitnam mentioned, I think it would be far more informative to watch interviews with retired stars, because they would likely have less bias towards bad-mouthing the industry.

    This has been an interesting topic! I’m curious to know what they’d have to say (and from both male and female stars) but wonder how genuinely candid, frank and honest they’d be? In general I suspect it wouldn’t be the best viewing material for recovering porn addicts.
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2019
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  11. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    This has become a great thread! I'll probably delete it soon since I realized it may and will lead to some people to experiment this on their own and that's not the point.

    PLEASE DO NOT TRY THIS!!
    Im almost completely certain it will lead to relapse.
     
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  12. nsb2019

    nsb2019 Fapstronaut

    There's this actress on a TV show that really resembles one of my favorite pornstars. Just seeing the tv actress triggers me. If I were to look up the porn star, I would inevitably end up on a porn site. Maybe not the same day, but I would eventually end up watching the pornstar. I know myself too well. I would go all the way with the slightest provocation.
     
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  13. Haddock

    Haddock Fapstronaut

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    This guy is not that religious in my opinion... Indeed, masturbating is a deadly sin (for a catholic at least) no matter the context. Basically, enjoying sex out of its context (meaning with your wife) is luxury.

    Yes. Very dangerous ! I reset my counter a few times because of this. I watched beautiful women talk...

    I'm not sure of this. I think that everyone understand pornstars are human being. Personally the last time I reset was because I read ("read", not "watched"...) a story about former pornstar talking about how her life was awful. I though it would help me. It didn't. Maybe I was because I'm not ready but in any case, I didn't need that to tell myself the P industry is evil...
     
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  14. Strijder

    Strijder Fapstronaut

    Yeah it does matter for me because if you’re “healed” then you should or be able to make healthy choices. It kinda sucks if something like P can break you in seconds. Then pmo is a stronger force than yourself and that doesn’t sound good to me.

    I just hope we are able to do always good when we are healed and not only when we just are witholding stuff. It’s not that I can’t leave P. I know the best thing is to skip it forever. For some others there isn’t a stronger force than the force of themselves. I hope that counts for me as well when I handled all of the things that made me addicted.
     
  15. L1ttl

    L1ttl Fapstronaut

  16. Omeed

    Omeed Fapstronaut

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    Thank goodness there are others who say how much it is not warranted to go back into this compulsion. I understand what you mean, but the only way to do this is the real life way. Watching a made video could be made for money like porn filmed as educational. Maybe do real life after you are making positive choices to actually help others who want removed from the porn industry. This should be applied to any paid industry including prostitution. It should include any individual regardless of gender or sex slave or title. It really should not be measured in how awful ones life was, but the positives ones life is becoming. I have seen to many ex-porn actors state their negative life on the exploration. At times they may go the opposite direction to do the work of God, but usually it never clicks so that they crawl back to an industry that they bad mouthed. I feel that makes the porn industry seem indifferent or that they seem to hire “crazy” people. The validation that porn is then harmful seems to be from the mouth of a hypocrite or attention seeker. I personally avoid the industry. My compulsion choice is contrary to that statement, but I do not attend pornography conventions or anything close to that. I would not even want to listen to a porn actor who has now changed his life. It would be too difficult for me to ignore the parts of the “old” industry he was part of to the point of obsession/relapse. If I had this thought I would dialogue with my addict because it is just a small trap towards a larger trigger.
     
  17. Hank Moody 99

    Hank Moody 99 Fapstronaut

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    It starts that way normal casual video then you'r back on porn. Don't do this there is no reason to watch this you'r putting you'r self on risk. Starts like that you watch something casual like girls in bikini then you start escalating to much strong sexual stimulation.
     
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  18. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Before deleting this thread forever, has anyone tried it? (PLEASE DONT). Did it help? Did you relapse?
     
  19. Strijder

    Strijder Fapstronaut

    I found this and I do agree with it why? I believe we must be stronger than porn and I believe we can. Humans are capable of everything as long as we believe in it. Believing that porn is stronger than you is a symptom of weakness and we as addicts are telling ourselves porn is stronger.
    Sure it’s hard and the pathways remain but the rational brain becomes stronger. I don’t believe it’s black or white, like you watch and be addicted or just keep it from you forever. Don’t hate me for it and I know porn is evil but I don’t believe in powerlessness if you moderate use it. Yeah you can fall back that’s the easy road but you can stay on track as well and that may be extreme hard but for some worth it.

    For instance, AA teaches that any use of alcohol is likely to lead to a relapse into problem drinking, but in fact there are many recovered alcoholics who return to controlled, moderate social drinking. AA’s approach isn’t right for everyone, Lewis points out.

    Even worse, AA is especially fervent about instilling in members the idea that they are powerless over alcohol. This is the opposite of teaching addicts to seize control of the future. “Most former addicts,” notes Lewis, “claim that empowerment, not powerlessness, was essential to them, especially in the latter stages of their recovery.”
     
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  20. allitnam

    allitnam Fapstronaut

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    @Strijder, you brought up a great point: not all of the approaches aply for everyone. I believe that part of this victory is to find your own path.
     
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