Weird to realize

[k33pmoving]

Hi everyone, so ive been pretty much single my whole life. Ive had some small non serious relationships in the past and it makes me wonder why Ive never connected to anyone deeply enough to sustain a relationship with them. I want to say it was because of my porn addiction and excessive PMO and lack of foresight to see it was a problem. Heck the longest relationship I had was with an actual pornstar (6months) but it wasnt a healthy one and I was using it as an escape from my mental health and problems at the time. Im trying to rule out porn addition by going into recovery to see for myself what non shallow connection could be like. Ive also been dating men and women but have very few people to talk about my relationship struggles with either or. So I just feel isolated in the fact that im not sure if im approaching dating or meeting people correctly. Has anyone felt hindered from their self inflicted dopamine abuse from PMO causing a disconnect in real life relationships?

 

[Don80]

I cannot relate completely to you because I'm married. But I haven't had long-term girlfriends. They were just attempts at relationship. However, after losing a lot of friends who just stopped keeping in touch, I gave up on the idea of frienship. I struggle to open up to people for fear of being hurt, rejected or laughed at. At this very moment I have no real-life friends. I mean people I could just talk with without any fear of being a burden. The older you get, the more people seem to be committed to their own families.