What about normal sex?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Paca, Feb 11, 2014.

  1. Paca

    Paca Fapstronaut

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    Hi together,

    I am new here and already on my way. Still this one question on my mind: what will happen if I have sex with my girlfriend on the weekend? will it be hard to go on stop watching porn after my weekend? does it affect the process in ay positive / negative way?

    Thanks for your stories!
     
  2. Jackieboy

    Jackieboy Fapstronaut

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    Yes....have lots of sex with her. It will make you two feel closer and then it will be harder for you to cheat on her with the porn. I've noticed that more sex with my wife has driven me away from porn. Humans are meant to be sexual....just not with a computer.
     
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  3. Mark

    Mark Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Im currently single but if I wasnt I would be relishing the opportunity to experience my partner anew away from the influence of porn. No the superimposed images and the way it has conditioned your preferences (especially visual) wont disappear over night but remember the old saying 'you never step into the same river twice' and so be open to experiencing and appreciating both yourself and your partner in new ways and it is these new experiences that will create new neural pathways/habits in your brain and surely this will move you further away from porn rather than closer to it? Just thoughts but I dont really know for sure as im doing my reboot after becoming single?
     
  4. Paca

    Paca Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for your replies both of you.

    In my opinion it was always harder to stop watching porn as a single. One night stands always ended with weak/no erection and my selfesteem always went further down down down. So of course porn was a great release as I imagindes myself as the great fucker doing it for hours with hot chicks...

    I will have sex with her but I will focus on the real sensual experiences and not try to fuck her like a pornstar. Easier said than done but this will be a big test after 2 weeks of not faping (already hard to stay focused :()

    Thanks
     
  5. slipsonic

    slipsonic Fapstronaut

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    I say go for it. You might be surprised how being sensual and in the moment come naturally. Last week I was wondering about the same thing, about whether I would just be thinking about all these porn scenes while having sex since it had been 10 days since I PMO'ed.
    But I found out it was the opposite. When I had sex with my GF I couldn't think about anything but her. My mind was blank for everything except her in that exact moment. I think that's how its supposed to be. and she loved it! After that I found it easier to resist PMO because the real thing became so much more intense.
     
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  6. digiter

    digiter Fapstronaut

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    I won't convince You to stop having sex, but I suggest everyone (most of all people in relationships) to understand the negative effect of ejaculation on health and well-being.
    Please read this topic:
    http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthre...view-on-ejaculation-and-its-effects-on-health
    and if You're going to continue the sex life I strongly recommend You to read the book - "Taoists secrets of love" by Mantak Chia and practice it (the link is in the topic about Traditional Chinese medicine). If You manage to control Your ejaculations You will have wonderful sex life and You won't loose precious energy. Second path is celibacy but of course it's better for single men, like me :)
    The knowledge won't hurt You, on the contrary - it can save Your most precious energy.
     
  7. muesli

    muesli Fapstronaut

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    That's what I fear. That any ejaculation, not just PMO, is bad. Sucks to be male.
     
  8. Mark

    Mark Distinguished Fapstronaut

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  9. Devil-May-Fap

    Devil-May-Fap Fapstronaut

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    Firstly hi Paca and welcome. Well for me after 10 days of PMO i had sex with my girlfriend and it was pretty great :) but the problem for me was the next day i ended up PMO'ing i guess i was trying to get that same dopamine rush i got when i had sex with my girlfriend but instead i got a split second rush then just felt really, really miserable about what i had done.
    Not saying that is the same for everyone but many people seem to say about it on here as 'the chaser effect'
    Basically i think go for it and you will probably already notice the positive effects from your 12 days of no PMO but just look out for triggers because i know i was much more sensitive to my triggers.
    peace.
     
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