What are your triggers?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by NewManV, Sep 24, 2017.

  1. NewManV

    NewManV Fapstronaut

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    I've barely survived my 1st week on rebooting, and I'm going to keep going to rid myself of porn and improve my life. One thing I didn't appreciate till now are the triggers: what things have pushed me to pull up the porn in the first place. After some thought, I came up with the biggest for me:

    • work stress, project deadlines, etc.
    • Fear of failing with performing or with women. Get on porn to "test/prove" to myself it still works
    • waking up and first thing in the morning
    • chaser effect - had successful intimacy with a woman, then feel overconfident that things are ok
    • relapse binge - I slip up and look at a little porn (PMO), and think I might as well get the most out of my failure
    • edging - a fantasy pops into my head, and then I think "I'll just touch myself a little without the O"
    • Viewing someone hot or seductive online, social media, etc.

    Curious to hear what other people's triggers are, and how they are doing to keep their mind in the right direction.
     
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  2. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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  3. RetroMike

    RetroMike Fapstronaut

    Relapse bingeing for sure. When I slip up or get a fantasy in my mind I immediately open up a P site and start M till I O. Then after a few minutes have passed I would repeat the cycle over and over and over until it hurts. I’m preventing this cycle from happening by not tricking my brain to watch or look at P subs because that’s how it starts and then seconds later I’m watching full blown P and the cycle begins. So no more “taking peeks” at P subs or P for me.
     
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  4. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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    Edging to me makes no sense.
     
  5. User047

    User047 Fapstronaut

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    While identifying your triggers might be helpful, because we can stay away from them most of the time.
    You can't escape them forever, sooner or latter you will be triggered.

    What matters most is "How will you actually deal with triggers and what are you planning to do"?
    If you focus your attention on thing that triggers you, you are going to have a hard time.
     
  6. My trigger is my own mind. Porn flashbacks.
     
  7. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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    It is also certain days of week and times with me. Now I have a strategy I follow
     
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  8. PasterofMuppets

    PasterofMuppets Fapstronaut

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    Hearing or seeing stuff about sex, mainly.
     
  9. I am in my third day and images online (youtube thumbnails specially) are my new challenge. Edging is a no, on my point of view is the same as fapping, I am doing this because I am addicted to the "feeling" so I will take all that way.

    Today is the one year aniversary of my grandfather's death which was my first real encounter with death so it been tough so being sad is a trigger for me but when I am depressed like I have been since I started this "helps".

    You have to stop edging it will hinder your progress.
     
  10. NewManV

    NewManV Fapstronaut

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    So true. I think deep down edging makes me think "have my cake and eat it too", where I don't O, so I can enjoy it a little. Then this turns into forever and I likely have the O anyways from going overboard (desensitizing myself physically is bad too). Mental porn flashbacks are dangerous too, I think that it isn't physical porn, so my mind can enjoy itself. And yes, Sunday and Monday are worst for me.
     
  11. Boredom and frustration are some of mine (besides alot of the ones that have been previously mentioned by you guys)
     
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  12. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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    On those days now I use my chastity device (it’s a shaft lock), I Pray, and assign myself a penance. Something I really don’t like or that causes mild discomfort but no pain.
     
  13. NewManV

    NewManV Fapstronaut

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    Has that really been an effective method of improvement for you? In the past when I tried to stop the porn habit, I would use negative reinforcement. But being so hard on myself, I ended up hurting myself mentally/emotionally, and stressed myself into giving into porn even more (depressing cycle). Recently I've been attempting to building my spirit up more and aim for positive rewards to stay on track.
     
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  14. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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  15. Sozboss92

    Sozboss92 Fapstronaut

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    For me my monkey brain says "well, it's been long enough. Treat yo self!". I really need to tell that guy to shut up sometimes. No guys. I'm not crazy.
     
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  16. SanityOverVanity

    SanityOverVanity Fapstronaut

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    I have many but cleavage is probably the worst.

    And it's virtually everywhere nowadays
     
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  17. newdawnnewday

    newdawnnewday New Fapstronaut

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    Feeling anxious, depressed or insecure. PMO is definitely a way for me to cope with those feelings.

    Another trigger for me is seeing girls wearing tight clothes in public. So many girls these days wear things where you can clearly see the outline of their bodies and it makes my mind pre-occupied with sex and looking at P.
     
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  18. Nabaski

    Nabaski Fapstronaut

    I'm on my 3rd rebooting week right now, and I'm feeling that urge to PMO for some days now, it doesn't seem to be a specific situation causing it
    sometimes i have some P flashbacks in my head, but I resist the temptation to PMO, so I do none of the 3
     
  19. Chris Darga

    Chris Darga Fapstronaut

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    My main trigger is alone time, when I have my thoughts to myself. Those thoughts don't turn to sex but rather, "I bet it would feel really good to M right now."

    A few times I've starting M'ing for a few seconds before stopping myself. I can't imagine edging, since it takes such a long time and would be a complete mind-fuck. I mean, how do you keep going when you know it's bad for you? Sorry if that sounds shitty but it just never made sense.
     
  20. NewManV

    NewManV Fapstronaut

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    I agree, edging is stupid. I think I've done it because I start out thinking, "man I really have the urges to look at P, I'll just look for a few min." And then I start the M, and keep thinking that I'll stop right away, since the "O" is the bad thing in my mind. Then those minutes turn to a long time and all logic goes out the window.
     
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