What Goes In, Must Come Out

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by thinkinglavender, Dec 20, 2017.

  1. thinkinglavender

    thinkinglavender Fapstronaut

    So i've been doing substantial amounts of self-reflection lately; what kind of person I am, the kind of person i've been, and the kind of person I want to be. Some slightly epiphanic thoughts for me, but not at all entirely new concepts for many, were centered around the idea that I pollute my own mind - not necessarily just by my own PMO struggles either. I have been living life in a very cynical/skeptical way, but I didn't even realizing I was doing that. I've always been quite emotional, but I didn't realize I wasn't very emotive. When I was younger, and people told me I was difficult to read, I took it as a compliment - I was proud. Now, not so much. I think a large part of healing, and becoming a more whole person, is giving off the kind of energy I want to take in. It is such an equal give and take, but as people we tend to focus on only what we can take. I guess, if you want to view it from a libertarian/Ayn Rand way, by focusing on what we give - that is what affords us control over what we take. Not to say that we should only do things from selfish ambitions, since selfish gratification of the appetites is what got many of us here - but clearly it is a motivating factor for many. I've been thinking a lot about a quote I read that, "we judge others by their actions, and ourselves by our intentions." I'm making a personal goal and mission to try to reverse that within my own life - to better myself through an objective lens, while not always assuming the worst in others. If anyone has any thoughts, comments, or disagreements - I would welcome it. I know this is a little bit all over the place, but I wanted to word vomit some of my thoughts here.
    Ongoingsupport likes this.
  2. Ongoingsupport

    Ongoingsupport Fapstronaut

    Just to hash it out a little more explicitly, we judge others by their actions and the way we frame the information. The same person and the same behavior may be just seen as a jerk or someone with a disease or unresolved trauma, for example. Both might actually be true, but I think something that's neglected is how we process stuff - even things which we'd all agree is negative. I can beat myself up with guilt and shame over PMO in either the recent or distant past, or I can use that as a learning opportunity and experience to better understand how to proceed and refine my plan. It doesn't change the fact it was negative, but it does involve extracting value from it instead of focusing on the obvious pathological aspect.
    thinkinglavender likes this.
  3. You’re on the right path.
    Kenzi and thinkinglavender like this.
  4. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

    Think about three years old kids.
    Because it's their favorite thing... To ask why?
    When they realize that they can question the world, that becomes all they want to do.
    And your quote...?
    It's like the grown-ups version of that.
    It's good.
    Basically... To simplify.. All you have to do tho.. Is ask, why?
    LEPAGE likes this.

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