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What I learned in my reboot. Might help you guys.

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Spartan17, Sep 9, 2017.

  1. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    So you realize you are addicted.
    And you have read the whole science bit o how addiction specially to porn how it works.
    Now realize that your past actions/behavior have created a chain of reactions. And that is in the form of withdrawals, negativity and so on.
    This is the way God wants you to attract you to Him. Or if you're atheist, this is how nature/science works to bring u back to balance.
    So religious folks, surrender to God. Im Christian so I give it all to Christ. Not in my control. Gods will.
    And atheist/science folks. Step out of your own way and let nature take it's course to balance.
    Easier said than done hmm?
    Actually yeah!
    I realized that it is very easy to recover from addiction.
    Either to choose to believe in miracle of God or miracle of science/nature.
    And it is absolutely OKAY to feel shitty, think negative, cry, complain about how you have no girlfriend or social life and all that!
    It's all part of the recovery. You learn to be okay with these shitty feelings!
    Just have faith that time is a great healer.
    Dont try to have mental strength. Just CHOOSE. And let nature take it's course.
    It's all gonna be okay.
    As long as there is tiny lamp of faith burning inside your hearts -that it's only temporary and nothing can really harm you, you will be fine!!!!
     
    Wazzai and seaguy44 like this.
  2. That's great advice. I,m 5 weeks clean, but lately I've been getting down on myself for not putting myself out there and meeting new people. Maybe if I give this more time, the urge to become more connected with the outside world will take over. As of now, I continue to be stuck in my own world.
     
  3. EthosLogosPathos

    EthosLogosPathos Fapstronaut

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    Guys, I'm in serious trouble. My older brother opened Chrome to watch some pirate movies (not P, don't worry, it's The Matrix and other movies like that), and my K9 that I installed blocked the page. Since he reinstalled Windows on my father's laptop( because of the same problem), he immediately deduced that I was the one who installed them (and unfortunately, he was right). He started calling me a fool for installing it, and made me think about the possibility of it being a ransomware (which I didn't, because I know far too well that K9 is completely reliable). And I did uninstall it by his request, and right now I'm feeling both sad and worried. I'm sad because that's what I get for fighting pornography alone: Nobody will know your dark secret, and nobody will help you or understand your deeds, and I'm worried because since my brother and I are pretty darn smart, I immediately realized that the moment I uninstall K9, I'd run the risk of relapsing right away, because there's no wall to deter me from watching P. What should I do now?
    Oh, and another question: I've heard stories about people trying to block the porn thoughts, and most of them said: "Don't try to hold on to the thoughts: just let it go, as if you were in spectator mode". What does that mean?
     
  4. seaguy44

    seaguy44 Moderator Assistant

    I'm a Christian too. I gave it all to Christ. Very helpful I agree.
     
  5. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    Whatever the struggle is, realize that you r okay throughout this. I would say keep the struggle going. There is nothing wrong with struggling over this at all! We can't be so sure about the outside world and you craving social interaction. Be kind and loving and gentle to yourself!! I think it's great to spend time alone in a good way. Meditating, studying scripture, praying. I did a lot of that in my starting of reboot days when I didn't really like talking to people. But then I wasn't so very deeply addicted that I couldn't do outside things.
    Struggling is not bad. Working yourself up also is not bad! Change is difficult. Just keep beating your legs in direction u want to go no matter how slow the process is. And keep that little lamp of faith burning. Realize God loves you so much. You're His child. He has no condemnation or anything negative at all. You are perfect. You will be okay, buddy. Keep the struggle going. Don't lose heart that's all.
     
  6. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    Be in touch with Him. But then it's not too difficult! He's so intimate! Already with you right now! What to say about being in touch?
     
    seaguy44 likes this.
  7. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    Man. K9 or not. If you want to relapse, you're gonna uninstall that damn porn blocking software no matter what. My experience too!
    Forget about it.
    No matter what folks say, pmo is a CHOICE.
    There is always CHOICE involved.
    That's my opinion atleast. But precautions don't hurt at the same time.
    Happy to see you're so worried abt this software being uninstalled. Shows how much you want to recover. But there's fear too. Fear is excellent. You'll be extra precautious witout k9 now!
    I don't understand what they mean about letting go thoughts myself but I usually say to myself: I'm a dude who's addicted. It is obvious I'm gonna have such thoughts. So I shud be concerned then? It rains and there's thunder and storm and blah blah. It simply happens. What to do? Why think I'm outside in an open field when I'm already in a safety of my house!
    So what I mean is: don't buy into the likes of those thoughts. You were okay a minute ago without them. Don't control dem. Don't fuck around with dem!
    Stop caring about them that's all.
    Just go and do something productive like push-ups or something
     
  8. EthosLogosPathos

    EthosLogosPathos Fapstronaut

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    Yes, I do agree that with or without K9 you'll still relapse, but the fact that there's a wall there can significantly deter me from watching P. You know, before I installed it, I would always take the chance to see hot women, but when K9's around, I know that would block porn sites. Now that it's gone, I'll have to resort to an extremely risky strategy: shutting the computer down whenever I walk into the room. I call this the "risky" way because there's a 64% chance of me getting controlled by fear the moment I wake the comp up, and then I'll start to doubt, and then (well, this is pretty damn disappointing) I'll relapse after a short debate with my brain about getting a dopamine high.
     
  9. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    I don't think it has to be that complicated. Just keep it simple.
    It's a choice. Plain and simple.
    Strategies don't work. Atleast for me they don't.
     
  10. EthosLogosPathos

    EthosLogosPathos Fapstronaut

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    I'm fully aware that your choice is the thing that matters, but I seem to be bad at that. That's why I came up with strategies. You see, my mind has a "good and evil" personality: the dark side of me will always find a way to watch porn no matter what and try to seduce me into watching lewd material, while the good side will find a way to counteract and foil those attempts and deal with the dark thoughts. And when it comes to the "make a good choice" game, the dark side almost always wins. I planned strategies with the intenion to avoid making a decision at all.
     
  11. Inspire360

    Inspire360 Fapstronaut

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    So true, just hit the switch and make this trick!
     
  12. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    But then you WILL be confronted to make decisions. I'm not trying to piss u off here brother. Making that choice is what is most important in recovery. It is also moment to moment choice. I'd go as far as saying it's even a second to second choice. Believe it.
     

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