What qualifies as a relapse?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Mr. Robot, Sep 1, 2019.

  1. Mr. Robot

    Mr. Robot Fapstronaut

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    Twenty year PMO addict with PIED. I'm in the midst of my longest streak ever (on my ninth day), and I want to know what qualifies as relapse.

    I've had a few times throughout the last week or so where I've had a stray thought and got erect, but quickly thought about something else. I've also had a couple of times where I'm either falling asleep or still not fully awake where I've had stray thoughts. And I try to avoid the thought that I'm avoiding porn (just not think about it at all), but there's been at least once where my thoughts strayed and a couple of brief thoughts about my favorite videos creeped in momentarily. I feel like the line is intent i.e. acting on the urges or purposefully inducing arousal, but I'm not sure.

    This is as far as I've ever been. I don't know what to expect.
     
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  2. MisterDirection

    MisterDirection Fapstronaut

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    Its each person's call.

    But the point for me was no M or P

    P is the enemy no doubt. But your mind is also against you. Flash backs will occur and stay thoughts and urges will occur. I dont think those are relapses.
    Yes they are what you are trying to make stop bit reprogramming or rehabbing your mind is what will do that and that's a process only time will perform.

    Keep moving forward
     
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  3. Your commitment is to no PMO. Don't view P, don't touch yourself sexually, and don't O intentionally -- do this, and you honor that commitment.

    Work on controlling your thoughts can begin at once, but it takes longer to master than the mind than it does to master the body. I wish you good success!
     
    Darren hutto likes this.
  4. Advocate109

    Advocate109 Fapstronaut

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    Watching porn or masturbating is a relapse for me
     
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  5. ababa

    ababa New Fapstronaut

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    does having sex with prostitute/escort count as a relapse?
     
  6. bigboibez

    bigboibez Fapstronaut

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    Its the wrong mindset to have really. I had it for a year and if i ever peeked, masturbated or whatever i thought i was back at 'day 0' and was all depressed. It is a destructive mindset.

    If you are still craving or peeking at porn then it is your body telling you that something needs to change.

    Usually, this is either in the form of mindset or lifestyle. Many people on this site recount 'a moment of revelation' when they knew they wouldnt watch porn again. This hasnt happened for me, so i was sick and tired of pissing about and decided to go the lifestyle route.

    A lot of people relapse because theyre bored, unfulfilled or lonely (if they dont have some past trauma). For me, it was boring studying and too much free tim, combined with lack of social interaction and exercise. If you work full time, youre already half the way there. You just need to find some sport or gym for the evenings, and social interaction for the weekends. Fill your time.

    I met a girl recently and i can say its the first time i felt like i havent wanted porn since a year ago. I had to push myself miles out of my comfort zone because for a year i was thinking that because i couldnt 'quit porn' i would never have a relationship and was unworthy (even tho i was in a relationship for most of it... paranoia is real).

    And finally, it is not about willpower. I havent missed a ice cold shower in the morning when possible since feb 2018. I workout lots. I do cardio. I own an AMG and just turned 22. I have a good career and have a degree. Was the highest achieving in my econ class before university. I have drive and willpower but nofap isnt about that.
    Its not about fighting the urge and NOT fapping. It is about finding things that make you naturally not want or need to fap. That might be work, social, exercise, or finding a girl. But mostly it will be about going out your comfort zone. That kills the urge dead.

    Good luck
     
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  7. NicoRobocop

    NicoRobocop Fapstronaut

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    porn and masturbating it's relapse, the rest can help to be more committed and don't fall
     
    RobbyGo36 likes this.

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