What small daily positive habits have you started incorporating into your life?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by ronswanson, Oct 16, 2015.

  1. ronswanson

    ronswanson Fapstronaut

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    I'm trying to develop lots of small positive daily habits that help me overcome my PMO addiction. I've started stretching every morning, drinking less coffee and more water, and taking more regular exercise, but I'd really like to hear what other people have started doing that has helped them.



    I'm gonna tag some people in this thread that I know are pretty knowledgeable, but I'd also really like to hear from people I've not interacted with before, so please comment! And please tag other wise people too! @Toven @galaxim @Calm @fercho29
     
  2. This year ive done this
    Ditch alarm clocks, wake naturally
    Less coffee more water
    Removed fb and messenger from cell phone
    Go to bed earlier
    Bath every morning
    Meditating after waking ive stated doing

    Watching less tv or virtually none at all now
    Get out more socially
    Phone rather than text if possible
    Listen to more music

    I think 2015 has been my wake up call
     
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  3. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    Walking, meditation every morning and night, reading self help books, working out 3x a week, showering regularly, grooming myself more, doing constuctuve things with my time, finding new music

    During my early reboot I did walking followed by yoga everyday,it helped me tremendously. It ccreated a bottom line which I grow new habits from. Use this strategy and add bits if good habits to your day as you become comfortable making smaller changes
     
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  4. recoome

    recoome Fapstronaut

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    bathing with soap everyday
    shaving off the beard if it gets too much
    not procrastinating to trim nails, cutting hair
    trying not to snooze
    reading books a lot
    no facebook n comparison of lives
    kegel exercises at times
     
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  5. galaxim

    galaxim Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for the invitation!

    This was my original routine:

    I divide my time between two axis: study and rest.
    "Study" comprehends all activities that require concentration: studing for your Faculty, reading, watching a movie.

    "Rest" is to sleep or to be with your eyes closed without doing anything, in your bed or in your garden.
    Imagine that study is white and the rest is black. All the greys must be eliminated. For example, if you turn on the computer, you do it because you have something specific to do. For example: write a paper. Once you're done with that, you turn it off.

    You can use Mozilla Thunderbird to check for your accounts: that way you don't have to browse through Google.

    When you're online, always use http://www.online-stopwatch.com/. When you're feeling a little tired, you get up and leave the room.

    I study in a room with no devices. No phone, no cellphone, no PC, no TV.
    Facebook is out. Twitter is out.

    The first month I used cold showers. No more hot water. When you're angry or you see that you can't go to sleep, you go and you take a quick cold shower, to cut those feelings out of your head.
    The first 20 days, somedays when I got home and I was feeling the urges, I just stayed connected at NoFap, listening to this for one hour, while writing here.
    Exercise everyday, as soon as you wake up: arms, legs, abs. Between 10 minutes-30 minutes, something that you're sure that you can sustain through time, every day.

    You have to unplug yourself from the net and act immediately when the thoughts are coming into your mind. For example, if I had problems sleeping and I was starting to move around in bed, I didn't wait for anything to happen: I just got up and took a cold shower. You'll have to get used to the daily discomfort.

    I'm also keeping track of my time use with an Excel file, so from the beginning of the day I know what's my energy level and what to expect for that day in particular.
    My Excel file is not to do 16 different things everyday (http://www.kratosguide.com/16-habits-you-should-do-every-day/), as I don't tend to procastinate. Is more to get precise information about my ups and downs. That has helped me to find better coping strategies.

    My original Excel sheet used to have to following fields:

    coffe (ammount of cups)
    tea
    general health state
    weather
    gym
    total hours sleep
    time of waking up
    time of falling asleep
    nap
    hours in PC
    cold shower
    learning a foreign language
    N° of times I check the mail
    N° of times I check the news

    It's was mainly to have a statistic of my daily habits. Some cells contained a number, others "YES/NO", others a color.
    On another sheet of the same document, I used to write what I did at each point of the day.
    Differently from Kratos, I don't plan to do 16 things everyday, basically I have two routines: mental exercise and body exercise.

    What has changed?

    1) The Excel sheet is much simpler now:
    -date
    -excercise (green/grey)
    -hours slept
    -waking up time
    -sleeping time
    -study languages (green/grey)
    -mo/pmo (green/red)

    The last field gets a green at the beginning of the day, that way you commit yourself to be free one more day. You can't have doubts about whether you're going to relapse or not. Always, always, you have to be 100% sure of your behaviour, but at the same time keep yourself humble.

    2) I still use a stopwatch, but only when I'm on the PC. If I'm studing in the living room, I don't use a stopwatch anymore.

    3) I always use cold water, but I don't take showers every single day.

    4) I've started to meditate a little bit, following the exercises from the book "You're not your Brain".

    5) I don't use an alarm clock to wake up.

     
  6. Hi @iamafapstronaut
    Thank you for tagging me.
    Since I started the reboot I have started working out and doing bicycle in the gym, this helps me to vent away all the stress and anger that I used to channel to PMO before.
    I am also trying to do some meditation, although it is still very hard for me to meditate more than 5 minutes without distraction.
    When I was too tense at night and could not sleep I sued to PMO or fap, now I have some yoga stretching routine that helps me to relax and sleep. Since the third month of my reboot I am not even taking more sleeping pills every day.
    The other fulfilling activity I have is to read and prepare my lectures ( I teach as a guest lecturer in a university).
    Hope this helps
    Fercho
     
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  7. asfixiated

    asfixiated Fapstronaut

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    I decided yesterday that I'm going to go on the forums and encourage at least one NoFap Newbie each day. It's kind of a win-win - it keeps me in the NoFap community, it helps encourage others to stay and pursue NoFap, and it's small and manageable so I can do it even when I have a really crappy day. I'm hoping to stick with it - maybe you could try it too!
     
  8. galaxim

    galaxim Fapstronaut

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    That's a very good idea. I'm trying to do that frequently.

     
  9. What as worked for me in that sense is trading mobile time on Facebook, messenger and instagram for time on NoFap forums... Engaging snd supporting.

    Remove three great big bottomless rabbit holes for one place you can engage, help, learn, support and enlighten people who are going through the same problems as you are.

    Leave social networking time as limited as u can... On a pc/laptop. I'm actually typing this on my cell at 4:25am having just woke up. Weeks ago id be surfing fb now.... But I'm helping you see the light instead. ;)
     
  10. Toven

    Toven Fapstronaut

    Firstly I'm very honoured to be included in this thread and tagged in. My sister has always been a good example for me in healthy living. The more we're balanced in a healthy routine, the better we will live.

    I've tried to adopt this, this time in my recovery efforts and it seems to be working. Here are a few must haves for me:

    1. Healthy eating and exercising (I still eat poorly every so often, but it's more of a balance than it was)
    2. No rich foods after 4pm... no heavy cheeses or creamy foods. It causes arousal apparently. I've just learned this.
    3. Daily affirmation of why I'm doing this, and that I will succeed
    4. Posting here daily (if possible) so that I feel accountable and that I can express absolutely everything I feel. I realise I need to talk about how I feel all the time, even if no one is listening. PMO was my release, now talking here is my release.
    5. Tell the truth, always! Being honest ensures that I cannot PMO, because there is nothing honest in PMO. It doesn't match who I want to be, or who people think I am, so in order to be honest I either have to tell people what I am/was, or not PMO. Being an honest person (with everyone) has killed my ability to PMO.
    6. Aim for balance in all things! Every aspect of my life must be balanced.
    7. Finally: do one thing each day that leads me towards the life I really want to life. I have big goals for life, I cannot have them with PMO in my life. Rather than simply trying to avoid this behaviour, I'm actively trying to live my real life.

    These are things that I have not done in my previous attempts. I have so much to continue to do such as limit alcohol and coffee, etc. But I am learning all the time. Discovering myself and liking myself without this addiction has been an enjoyable journey. I'm so proud of myself, and I like myself. I do not want to go back to porn. I cannot be overconfident, so I need to keep up my defences. Each day I look for new ways to improve my defence, not just patch up weaknesses, but rather go on the offence. I will win!
     
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  11. ronswanson

    ronswanson Fapstronaut

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    I'm so glad you pointed me towards that 16 Habits book! I've been reading through it, there's so much thought-provoking stuff in there.

     
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  12. theDoctorSmith

    theDoctorSmith Fapstronaut

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    After I started my challenge, I made a check list to which I've added new goals and removed those I did not feel the need to follow -

    1) No PMO [On a 40 day streak right now]

    2) Reading [Right upto the point my internship started I read for an hour every day. Still a daily goal that I do not meet. I will when I get back to college]

    3) Cold Showers [For the sake of staying alert in the morning and for acne. Kept it everyday except 1-2 days during the most hectic days of my internship]

    4) Sleep Better [Try and sleep until you wake up naturally. During internship it means sleep when you can.]

    5) Eat Healthy [Three meals a day. Manage is mostly]

    6) No Swearing [Tried in the initial stages. No longer practice it. Too difficult to keep track. I make a conscious effort to avoid when I can now]

    7) Be a better person [No fixed rules. Whenever I feel like I was a [email protected]#$ I consider it a fail]

    8) No binge watching [Cannot watch more than 1 episode a day and 1 movie a week. So much more productive now]

    Goals I will be adding to from November when I get back to college for the next semester -

    1) Eat Healthy [Add two fruits a day]

    2) Push-ups [Goal is to do 100 push-ups in a single set once in the morning and once in the evening. I manage 40-50 in three sets now. Long term goal.]
     
  13. ronswanson

    ronswanson Fapstronaut

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    @britaxe @galaxim @nofapturnaround @Toven @asfixiated @Thechosenone @tiredofmyself - thank you all so much for contributing to this. It's been really helpful for me. @galaxim talked about an article called 16 Habits You Should Do Every Day, which has particularly inspired me, and as a result I've written a long list of things I would like to be able to complete in an ideal day. I emphasise the ideal because I recognise I'm a failing human being, and actually doing everything on the list in one day is completely unachievable. The point is that tracking all the things I consider are important will remind me to accomplish them more frequently, so I will get closer to the person I want to be.

    Here's my list. For every day you have the option to select "yes" or "no" for every item.

    MOST IMPORTANT
    PMO Free

    START THE DAY WELL
    Chat with fiance
    Snuggle fiance
    Drink water first
    No more than 2 coffees
    Stretch
    Sleep well
    Meditation
    Morning clean up the apartment
    Make the bed

    LIVE THE DAY WELL
    Do some language study or talk with fiance in foreign language
    Read something inspiring/challenging
    Complete NoFap Academy exercise
    Piano - play whatever you want
    Eat well - no junk or high-fat food
    Contact a Family member
    Contact a Best friend
    Contact a more distant friend/family
    Go out of my comfort zone
    10 mins max Facebook
    Help someone on NoFap forum
    Help my Accountability Partner
    Read something that inspires me in my work
    Complete all my essential daily tasks for work
    Do a task that contributes to long term goals for career
    Go cycling
    Do Powerball
    Go Walking
    Climb the stairs (9 flights to our apartment!)
    Do Piano exercises
    Be restrained in financial decisions
    Track expenses
    Don't be a [email protected]#%!
    Forgive yourself
    Relax

    END THE DAY WELL
    Do proper post-cycling stretches
    Brush your teeth twice daily
    Ensure you've finished time-sensitive work
    No alcohol
    No cigarettes
    Healthy meals all day
    Plan tomorrow
    Review today
    Recreational reading / TV (not binge-watching)
    Remove technology from bedroom
    Complete the Gratitude Challenge
    Chat with Fiance
    Snuggle with Fiance
     
  14. asfixiated

    asfixiated Fapstronaut

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    This is an excellent idea! I encourage you to try this. Just make sure that you're happy with yourself even if you do just one of these things. In fact, make sure you're happy with yourself if you do none of them, but still remember about them.

    Hell, just be happy with yourself period :D!

    And I wouldn't say you're a "failing" person or a "succeeding" person - look at it objectively! You're a person who has goals and ambitions, and you make constant attempts - some successful, some not successful - at completing those goals! And when you have an unsuccessful attempt that doesn't mean you "failed" completely - it means you didn't achieve your goal, but you learned from it! You're always moving forward, even when you fail.

    I know it sounds like I'm "happifying" things, but I'm really not - I'm just saying it how it is :D! Using words like "success" and "failure" assigns value to things, and gives them an unnecessary "emotional" spin, which can lead to negative feelings in the long run. If you keep it objective and unemotional, you'll keep your head clearer and lighter and save mental energy for the things that matter!

    Good luck, I'm rooting for you man!
     
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  15. ronswanson

    ronswanson Fapstronaut

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    You're quite right! But when I described myself as a "failing" human being I meant that I accept that at times I will "fail" and that is what is part of being human and needs to be accepted, as all part of a rich human experience.

     
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  16. theDoctorSmith

    theDoctorSmith Fapstronaut

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    I'm not going to wait until Nov 1st. I'm going to start with my goals from tomorrow. Bloody damn near masturbated because I procrastinated yesterday with my work. No more of that. Will add a few more goals after reevaluating my current goals and lifestyle.
     
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  17. theDoctorSmith

    theDoctorSmith Fapstronaut

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    [] NoFap - No PMO

    [] Reading: Leisure reading for an hour everyday.

    [] Cold Showers: Speaks for itself

    [] Sleep Better: On regular days 8 hours or natural sleep cycle. When I have work, whatever I can get.

    [] No binge watching: Old rules. Not more than 1 episode a day and 1 movie a week.

    [] Eat Healthy: Most important. Three meals a day. Mixed fruits twice a day. No soda. Everything else is acceptable. Greens every alternate day.

    [] Be a better person: No fixed rules. Just don't be [email protected]#$.

    [] Don't Procrastinate: Finish my work when I have to. Never push it.

    [] Push-ups: As many push-ups as I can when I wake up in the morning.

    [] Brush twice a day: I have braces, I have to follow this. Also better breath and whiter teeth never hurt anyone.
     
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  18. chucknorris

    chucknorris Fapstronaut

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    Making the bed!
     
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  19. Pavel

    Pavel Fapstronaut

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    1. Checking and writing in Nofap forums everyday.
    2. Managing my activities in a calendary daily.
    3. Eating healthier.
     
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  20. mountain-boy

    mountain-boy Fapstronaut

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    That is a very good point. I am a newbie in this forum, but I am busy with self-improvement since a while.
    One point to me is, not to overstretch our goals - and not trying to follow to many habits, it makes us to slaves.
    One practical thing, which I just started, and is working quiet well: I don't have my smartphone at the bed, so I am not tempted ...
     
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