What substitue should I find

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Saurav04, Feb 16, 2020.

  1. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

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    I tried leaving PMO from last 12 years, now I am 25. I abstain from PMO. First few days, then weeks it felt good. You start going to gym, feel good about having more energy and time. But after a month there is so much desire in me for having sex. I again started seeing porn again but it no longer make me feel that good, all I want is to have sex. I am virgin 25 years old. What is the substitute of sex or something so I don't think about sex or is it okay to have sex with prostitute but I am afraid they can have disease and I don't want to tell anyone about going to prostitue.
    The feeling of wanting to have sex is really strong.
     
  2. Coco99

    Coco99 Fapstronaut

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    It's ok to be a virgin at 25. There is no timeline to lose your virginity. If you find gym boring. Take a boxing class. think of sex as a "high" what happens after you have sex? You will continually keep wanting more of it. If you go see 1 prositute, you would want to do it again and again and again. This is not only going to waste your money but you will feel guilty afterwards. At this point in your life. You need to try to shift the focus on building yourself to a point where girls are attracted to you. Gym is one way of doing it, new hobbies like dance class/ cooking class/boxing class etc is another way.
     
  3. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    You can't find a substitute for sex, that would be a total failure.

    You should find a girl.
     
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  4. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    No, it's not okay being virgin at 25.

    You're encouraging a young man to not improve himself when is so obvious he needs it bad. And you're probably damaging people by leaving this type of comments.
     
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  5. Coco99

    Coco99 Fapstronaut

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    Negative, clearly your missing the point here. I'm encouraging him to find meaningful relationships and to stay away from prostitutes. You're encouraging a young man that sex is the only thing in life. There is more to life than sex. Your only focus in life shouldn't be sex
     
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  6. Nucleus

    Nucleus Fapstronaut

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    Of course it’s ok to be a virgin at 25. When you find a decent girl, have sex with her... just don’t settle.

    prostitutes? Dreadful
     
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  7. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    No, i never said him to hire a escort, in fact i never did it in my life.

    I'm only saying that the "it's all okay and perfectly fine" mindset will not help him.

    Nobody's only focus in life is sex here.

    Being 25 and sexually stucked at a 12 years old boy level is not okay, whatever justification you put before it.

    In my personal experience, guys who wait too much for the right girl regret it badly wheb they realize how left behind they are in comparison to their peers.
     
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  8. Coco99

    Coco99 Fapstronaut

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    Again, if you re-read what he is talking about. He is desiring for sex to a point where he is considering prostitute. The mindset of "ohh I'm 25 and still a virgin so I have to have sex because everyone else did" is unhealthy. No where did he say I am waiting for the right girl
     
  9. Nucleus

    Nucleus Fapstronaut

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    Nothing wrong with waiting for the right girl. Comparing with peers seems stupider and stupider as you get older.

    He is obviously obsessed with sex, and that’s what lead him to NoFap. I say... cool it.
     
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  10. Coco99

    Coco99 Fapstronaut

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    It is though. Everyone has there own timing. Everyone goes through life at different stages.
     
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  11. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

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    of course is unhealty, we agree on that.

    Maybe i didn't express my point clearly enough: the guy needs to find a girl. There's no substitution for that.
     
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  12. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

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    I will be honest I never told this to anyone. I had gf she was good I told her to have sex. She was also virgin she wanted to stay like this until marriage, so I never forced her. Once she told me if "sex matters to me a lot then do it with me" but she also said she didn't want to. So I never did that. Later she broke up with me because we were in long distance relationship.
    It's not about finding right girl for me right now. It's hard to wait this feeling is really hard to control I no longer want to fap to a screen.
     
  13. Coco99

    Coco99 Fapstronaut

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    You just need to find someone at a party/dating sites/gym etc. Spark a connection. Just don't go down the path of doing it with a prostitute. Do you really want to lose your virginity to one.
     
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  14. Max666

    Max666 Fapstronaut

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    Find a way to distract yourself away from sex for at least 3 months. From then on it's smooth sailing. Your brain becomes rewired at that time and no-fapping and sex becomes a distant memory, temptation is gone and you should be able to control your life and bring whoever you want in it. A month isn't long enough.
    Remember sexual desire is the most basic, primal urge. What separates man from animals is his ability to control it. Otherwise you might as well walk around dragging your knuckles. Women want intelligent, sophisticated men, not horny dogs who drool at the sight of a short skirt. They will not find you attractive if you have no control over your basic urges. You'll just be a monkey. Trust me, there's plenty of monkeys walking around. What makes you stand out from the rest?
     
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  15. nothing you can do tbh. im a 25 yo virgin. embrace you suffering.
     
  16. nothing you can do tbh. im a 25 yo virgin. embrace you suffering.
     
  17. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

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    500+ days amazing, how's life going for you. I have relapsed again and after relapse life feel shit. But there is one thing after masturbation I don't feel wanting sex or any porn.
     
  18. its extremly stable and repetitive. you could say im in stasis. it literally feels like time is frozen

    u have 33 days whcih is good. try to go for 3 monts. small goals first
     
  19. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

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    Yes will definitely try
     
  20. PrinceOtaku

    PrinceOtaku Fapstronaut

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    Fuck what guy was saying above, every man deserve to get their rocks off, if you dont do it now you will be 45 still waiting on that perfect "girl" Listen you gotta do what you gotta do. Everybody has sexual needs. Do that but in the mean time work on yourself and improve on yourself so you can have a healthy relationship in the future
     

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