What to do when you don't know what to do with your life?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by bikinhappy, Jun 7, 2019.

  1. I am on day 16th now.
    My feeling at the moment is feeling unsure about what I want to do in my life.
    I think its up and down.
    Sometime I know, sometime I don't know.
    I assume this will be a constant questions throughout life.
    There will be a period when we dont know the direction.

    My question to you: what will you do at those period of time?

    What activities that you do that will bring inspiration, clarity and the faith to go forward?

    Lets share :)
     
  2. The Bink

    The Bink Fapstronaut

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    Hey man,

    Everyone is lost someday, it's something that's inevitable I think. I find the best thing to do when that happens is keeping a strong foundation. For me that is meditation, eating well, working out, spending time in nature and with family/friends. I know I can always fall back to these things that will keep me stable, and that's what helps me a lot. Eventually I'll find purpose again and move on from there on out.

    Hope that answers your question somewhat.
     
    J-CAT likes this.
  3. Hopingforfreedom

    Hopingforfreedom Fapstronaut

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    http://www.porn-free.org/Devotions/devotions.htm
     
  4. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    Sharing is a great start, and I think that's why it's the foundation of any recovery program/fellowship. By being in community with people it's a natural/organic kind of "reality check" even if it doesn't tell you specifically what you should do with your life.

    By way of contrast, some people are not in community very much at all - I think in truth you'll find they may never spend time in actual conversation with other people outside of work or home, and even home is questionable or it may be limited by social roles such as being the parent in which case it may mean they never have a real dialogue and get to know their family at all. In this way I think a lot of moralistic frameworks are simplistic and does not respect our individuality as human beings, in my experience this appears to be exacerbated by collectivistic cultures but certainly even in an individualistic one like America there are issues, especially when people are not interested in introspection.

    So I think the solution is really a combination of both, we need community but it should be based on unity and not uniformity. Real differences exist, and to me thinking in terms of cookie cutter norms is at the very least lazy and leads to a situation that disrespects our individual talents and it starts looking like a robotic/zomie kind of existence - of which I think PMO is one way that manifests.

    So what this looks like sometimes I think is casual conversation, off-topic certainly has a place in real community of any kind even if the main focus is on a specific kind of recovery. After all, there's what we are recovering from and what we are recovering toward - and what we're moving toward is nothing less than the full range of our humanity, whatever that is for any given individual. "Knowing" what to do, or even success in many cases may mean people are only running a script. They may even make a lot of money and have what appears to be a nice life, but when I take a step back I wonder if that kind of existence can be life or if it's just workaholism in disguise.
     
  5. For me the most valuable thing that brings purpose to life is friends/social contact. Meet with friends. If you don't have good friends at the moment, prioritize getting some.(can be family aswell i think)

    With friends comes a lot of drive. You might want to succeed in your work, so your friends will be proud. You might want to get in shape, so your friends will complement you. And so on.
     
    bikinhappy likes this.
  6. Hopingforfreedom

    Hopingforfreedom Fapstronaut

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    But don't base your self worth on your friends! They can turn out to 'not' be friends at the drop of a hat.
     
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  7. Wonderful insight! :)
    Thank you very much guys :)
     
  8. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    start by asking yourself: What can I do right now that I know will make my life better? It could be something like putting away washing, emailing your boss, something small, but do it right now. Then ask: what can I do in the next day/month/week that will make my life better? Do these things for a few months and it will become more apparant to you what you need to do.
     
    J-CAT likes this.
  9. J-CAT

    J-CAT Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for sharing this.
     
    The Bink likes this.
  10. J-CAT

    J-CAT Fapstronaut

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    This is easier said than done! Yesterday I told a friend who I know is of no benefit to me and who has only brought negativity into my life that I no longer want to see them. However, today I am also seeing the good sides to that friend's personality and I am considering whether I have lost a good friend. Today I felt that I could become lonely like I once was. I still have many friends. Now I will value them better.
     
  11. Hopingforfreedom

    Hopingforfreedom Fapstronaut

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    You are way better off removing one negative than you are keeping 100 positives, why? Because the one negative is all it takes to cancel out 100 positives if you are not strong enough, or if you don't grow your self-worth. How badly did you allow that 'negativity' to affect you? That's the direct sign that tells you to get it out of your life or not... fear of loneliness should not be your master or it will master you. You wanna know what loneliness is, read the Psalms. Your hardest but strongest exercise in life will be becoming a secure individual that can stand alone.
     
    bikinhappy likes this.
  12. Kiz Whalifa

    Kiz Whalifa Fapstronaut

    There are many helpful videos on YouTube that would help you with that question, or you can observe your ideal self. Here's a very good video on that topic.
     
  13. Awesome, so start by little things? Its great tips. Thank you


    Wow, great videos. Thank you I am inspired a lot by this video :)
     

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