What you consume, consumes you

What your mind consumes, determines what consumes your mind. What consumes your mind, controls your life.

Practice mindful consumption. What you do, watch, listen to, read, eat, drink, and who you spend your time with will have a vast effect on how connected or disconnected you feel from day to day.

In the past I have consumed a lot of negative things (porn, news, negative movies, negative music, negative books, drama, negative people that are in victim mode and constant complaining about their life). It needs time now to fully rewire from those and have a more healthy positive outlook.

What I will do:

• I will surround myself with positive people with whom I can laugh, that put a smile on my face.

Watching:

• I don’t watch porn, because it is all negativity. The way they treat the women, is not how I want to treat women. I want an intimate loving relationship, laughing with a woman, connecting with women. I want to look lovingly at women. I want to look them in the eye. Porn doesn't show that and that is impossible to get if I watched porn.
• To rewire my brain from the porn images, I will watch videos/movies on Netflix that show intimacy (romantic movies). I will watch love visualization. I need my brain filled with those healthy positive images, so my brain visualizes love and intimacy that I really want in my life.
• I will avoid certain things on Netflix: negative documentaries like the one about Jeffrey Epstein, movies based on drugs, fear, war, murders, etc.
• I will only watch comedy and romantic movies that have a positive effect on me.
• I avoid social media. It feels overwhelming. There is a lot of negativity, complaining and talking shit in social media. Social media is also soft-core porn.

Listen to:

• I will listen to music, that has a positive influence in my life (bollywood, arab music, reggae, dancehall).
• I avoid hiphop music that contain drugs, misogyny (bitches, whores) etc.
• I avoid negative and pessimistic people. I am an optimist person. I had a pessimistic friend and it affected my life through his negative outlook. Fortunately, I am rid of him and I will no longer allow pessimistic people in my life. They have a problem for every solution.
• I will avoid people that are complaining about their life and don’t do anything about it. I won’t discuss with them, argue with them or convince them to change. I will just leave it up to them. I will let them in their victim mode. I will excuse myself and go away quickly.

Read:

• I don’t read the news. It is only negativity. Reading the news feeds anxiety, anger, frustration. It has a negative influence in my life. The way I look to people become more negative. Now, due to coronavirus, I read it once in the two weeks. A lot of the messages in news about the coronavirus are contradictory.
• I will only read books that have positive influence in my life. No books about drama, drugs world, war, terrorism, addictions. Only books that lift me higher or makes me smile/laugh.

Eating/drinking:

• I only drink water and coconut water
• I only eat whole foods (Gluten-free, diary-free, lot of greens, salads, vegetables, chicken, meat, turkey, nuts, seeds).

 

You are right man. The romantic movies show the beta male. Do you have good recommendations for better movie?

I have read the book No More Mr. Nice Guy and that changed my whole life. I set myself on the first place. I am direct and honest to people. I revealed all of my toxic shame to safe people. I am able to handle conflicts. I set boundaries.
Nice Guy was my biggest problem and that was one of the reasons of the compulsive use of porn, acting out with prostitutes, swingerclubs, sexparties etc. I don't have problems with porn anymore, less urges, I think mainly because I am not that Nice Guy anymore.

The only thing that I still need to work on: I want to be more comfortable with my sexuality and express my sexuality more. I don't want to hide my sexual feelings for a girl. Sometimes when I talk with a women, I keep it safe. I want to show that I am sexually interested in her. Even when girls came up to me to talk and I saw that they were interested, I kept it safe.

The book 3% man of Corey Wayne have I read also. But I found also some beta things in that. I found that more complicated than that from Robert Glover. The new book from Robert Glover: Dating Essentials For Men is a good one. More direct and more easy to implement I think. I need to take my next step to implement Dating Essentials For Men completely in my life. That will change my whole life again, like the No More Mr. Nice Guy book did. Did you read Dating Essentials For Men?