What's the point in having a girlfriend?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by DaveyCrockett, Dec 27, 2018.

  1. Depressed&Out

    Depressed&Out Fapstronaut

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    On the other hand, you can't always trust 'self-reported' opinions, for one reason or another.
     
  2. Coolyorky

    Coolyorky Fapstronaut

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    Work hard and go on the offensive financially until your at least 30/35 years old.

    Then settle down with a good honest women and have a family. Some to grow old with. Retire and enjoy grandkids
     
  3. Clarke

    Clarke Fapstronaut

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    There's no hard data but it makes sense that someone who's religious and has homosexual urges would try to become a part of the church structure to become closer to God and maybe overcome their desires. There's reports coming out all the time of gay orgies in the Vatican and it's always the alter boys who are molested. So imo there's a significant percentage of repressed homosexuals there.
     
  4. Depressed&Out

    Depressed&Out Fapstronaut

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    Too late for me now. Even if i recover from PIED, 5 years of playing the field will not be enough! Probably 10-15 years and by then I'd be 45-50! Yikes!!
     
  5. Depressed&Out

    Depressed&Out Fapstronaut

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    Other people's brain's can be extremely biased.
     
  6. I'mJustAChoice

    I'mJustAChoice Fapstronaut

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    No offense but these are the usual thoughts of someone who hasn't experienced love, once you fall in love and you are loved back, you will consider that feeling to be the best in the world. We are social beings, and the level of connection, authenticity and deepness that you attain with a lover is not attained with anyone else. It feels just too good. It's simply put the best social relationship. I only wish I could love a woman the way I loved as a teen, when sexual thoughts weren't even involved, and I'm always hoping for that to happen again. Something that can only happen if you go around meeting women, until you find the one that you can't but love.
    All the theory in the world doesn't matter, the thing is that love is worth it.
     
    Last edited: Jan 19, 2019
  7. Mr Sitter

    Mr Sitter Fapstronaut

    As someone who had never been in a relationship until about a month ago, I echoed similar sentiments back then. But now I understand the value of a loving partner. Especially one who understands my issues with PMO. If it wasn't for her, I probably wouldn't have made the leap to recover from this mess. And she is a huge motivation for me to recover.

    Monks train all their lives to suppress a basic human desire. I've interacted with many monks on my travels and they're all a bit...weird. They pretend to be frugal and everything, but spend their waking hours either meditating or walking around streets and shops getting "donations". I've been to Sri Lanka where they're exempted from having to pay for anything in any of the shops. You can see the look of anguish on the faces of shop owners when a monk enters their shop. Absolute leeches.
     
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  8. UnHoodedRat

    UnHoodedRat New Fapstronaut

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    The reason for me having a girlfriend is because it’s someone you can talk to about anything, have sex with, and grow together with.
     
    ReclaimedLife likes this.
  9. ReclaimedLife

    ReclaimedLife Fapstronaut

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    Thank you so much. This is encouraging for anyone here to NOT give up on woman and why it is so important to prepare yourself the best you can to be in a relaionship. Even if you don't have one right now and don't even see one coming.

    Believe in your own abillity to make Life beautiful for you and your future Partner.
    Every single person on this planet can learn how to read and then read the information necessary to fill the gaps.

    We are all able and responsible to bring the best out in the people around us, and especially, outselves.
     
    Mr Sitter likes this.
  10. Anubis Rises

    Anubis Rises Fapstronaut

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    your not messing out on anything, long as if you have close friends or something you can talk about your feelings too, or whatever,scienitists claim you still alter your dna as you grow, your still transforming it, i dont know how long it gets transformed or whatever, so if you can get smart as you can, get as much disipline as you can, before reproducing,ive been single since 2010 an i dont feel lonely i dont get attached to people like i use to, i just live my life to the fullest,
     
  11. ReclaimedLife

    ReclaimedLife Fapstronaut

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    Hmmm... either you have casual sex in the meantime, dont like sex, or don't find it worth persuing.

    Are you going MGTOW?
     
  12. Anubis Rises

    Anubis Rises Fapstronaut

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    unfortunately in the region of my country woman dont get into relationships with guys like me, im a cook as profession a major no no for woman around here ,i have to move if i want to be with womans, but im here keeping care of my grandma ,my grandparents raised me, theres a price to everything even the person you are has a price, im paying in full without hesistation, all my patience an time
     
  13. ReclaimedLife

    ReclaimedLife Fapstronaut

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    @LostCloud I want to read the articles that got you so many likes and apparentely resonated with so many people. I feel i might be able to learn from you quite a lot. Can you please give me a link to those threads?
     
  14. Anubis Rises

    Anubis Rises Fapstronaut

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    im sorry but im not sure what threads your referring to ,you mean all the other threads not relating to this thread,
     
  15. Agent Sweet

    Agent Sweet Fapstronaut

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    It is possible to live the life you want to live if you leave the house. If you are around family they will force you to get married because they consider it as a responsibility to get you married. As elders in my family believe you need a company in life to be happy. But when you are away they will not force you that much.

    "I don't intend to release my vital energy ever again (not kidding about), I even get very upset at myself when I wake up to findthat I had a wet dream."
    I have found that not sleeping in the day time had a significant effect on it.
    And going to bed only after 30-60 min after having food or milk.
     
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  16. These opinions right here are IMO one of the reasons why incels exist... on the one extreme we have guys being told that women are all horrible people and you should stay away from them and on the other hand you have guys being told that they're losers because they don't have a wife/gfand that they're worthless without one and both sides are wrong. Instead of demonizing women or demonizing guys who don't have a gf why don't we find a middle ground where we acknowledge the benefits and negatives of having a wife/gf along with being single. Don't discourage guys from getting gfs by generalizing all women as horrible nutty man hating feminists who they should stay away from and also don't do like what many in this thread have done and put women on pedestals and have guys base their entire self worth on whether or not they're in a relationship. Simply tell guys that it's OK if they want to be in a relationship and that it's OK to be single but don't pressure them to choose either way or chastise them if they choose a particular way over the other.
     
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  17. ReclaimedLife

    ReclaimedLife Fapstronaut

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    Please show me where i demonized woman or guys who don't want ot have a GF.

    I don't advocate not wanting a GF. But i am asking questions on WHY people don't want a gf. Often times, there is are issues that people didnt resolve yet. I haven't seen anyone of my friends who is really happy with who they are as a person and have 0 interest in either girls or guys(whatever they are interested in).
    Most people just walk around without solving their own issues.
    Because of how difficult that can actually be.
     
  18. I apologize... maybe you didn't demonize them but you keep implying that there's something wrong with being single or wanting to be single.
     
  19. I don't think you should get a girlfriend when you're rebooting. You will learn things from having a girlfriend, some of them will be positive and some will be negative. I learn a number of things from my ex like the importance of healthy eating and chewing food well. I also learnt how damaged a woman can be if her father dies when she was a young child. Having a girlfriend could make you grow if you allow it to. I would say though you should only have a girlfriend if you want to, it would be a bad idea to get one because your Mum wants you to have one. One reason relationships come to an end is because people get into relationships because family and friends pressurised them to get into a relationship. Maybe next time your parents put pressure on you maybe you could show this article where the writer researched marriages that have been successful and unsuccessful and one reason he lists for people getting a divorce is pressure from family and friends to getting in a relationship.
     
  20. ReclaimedLife

    ReclaimedLife Fapstronaut

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    Ok. You are right about that. I personally have a hard time believing that a healthy man who is able to attract girls wouldn't want to do that. That includes regular girlfriends as well as short term affairs, if both are aware of that and are happy with it. I also don't know anyone who is like that personally, who can attract pretty girls and actively chooses not to want them in his life. Everybody who is able to attract them, either has a girlfriend or has girls in his "proximity" he can sleep with if he chooses to do so.
    But i am very happy to get to know a guy like that. Who is able to attract beautiful girls, enjoys sex and intimacy and purposefully decides he doesn't want it.
    I would actually be very interested in someone like that, just to understand it.

    Any form of "forced relationship" is more likely to be way more difficult(and i am being nice here) then the ones where two partners find together because they find each other attractive, share similar inierests and are intelectually on a similar level as well.
     

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