What's your worst experience with porn?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by vulture175, Sep 23, 2019.

  1. Jonny1992

    Jonny1992 Fapstronaut

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    This is really horrible. Never fall that deep again!
     
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  2. Jonny1992

    Jonny1992 Fapstronaut

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    did you tell your wife?
     
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  3. VK2019

    VK2019 Fapstronaut

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    @Jonny1992 Yes I did eventually.

    I don't remember when, but I did:

    - I confessed about cheating on her with escorts
    - I confessed about my trauma
    - I confessed about all the money I lost because of the escorts *addiction
    - I confessed about cheating on her with other people (non-escorts) a.k.a acquaintances (still paid them,lol)
    - I confessed about my bisexual experiences from the past (porn induced)

    I know that 99.99% of the female population would have gone crazy about it.

    She was upset about the cheating and money and all, obviously.

    But at the same time, she was very non-judgemental and extremely empathetic.

    I'm one lucky fucking dude to have her.
    She actually saved my life from a chronic disease (I recovered, reversed it using alternative medicine) a few years ago, spent 3 months locked inside the apartment with me and she never left me alone for 1 minute.

    I'm one fucking lucky dude to have her. Her love is pure.
     
  4. Jonny1992

    Jonny1992 Fapstronaut

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    Wow, that is good that you were honest! And honestly! Proud of you!
    But you really are lucky to have auch a wife, it is up to you now. The way you and me are now actually don’t deserve such a woman.

    so let’s keep working on ourself.
     
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  5. VK2019

    VK2019 Fapstronaut

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    @Jonny1992 I agree and politely disagree at the same time, but I 100% respect your opinion.

    I agree to the degree that we need to get our shit togheter, as soon as possible.
    And I belive we can, and we are.

    I disagree to the degree that we don't deserve such a women.

    The reason I'm saying that is because I had plenty of experiences with "verbal play" and I now understand the meaning behind the words.

    Words are more powerful than we expected them to be.
    Trust a guy who used to like to get verbally humiliated. That killed my manhood. I know this is different, but they are still words.

    If we say we don't deserve something, then we don't.
    If we say we deserve something, then we do.

    Our brain doesn't differentiate thoughts from reality.
    thoughts lead to emotions and emotions lead to action.

    I would much rather do a positive action than a negative one.

    Stay strong my friend, we can do this!
     
  6. Jonny1992

    Jonny1992 Fapstronaut

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    Well i my case, I cannot start an relationship, because I feel very Dirty and unfaithful with my PMO Addiction, that I think I don’t deserve a woman. I am glad that you have one and that you respected my opinion.
     
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  7. Jonny1992

    Jonny1992 Fapstronaut

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    So do you mean changing an attitude to your ownself helps to become what you want to be?
     
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  8. This is really horrible. I hope you're far from that experience and it will never happen again to you.
     
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  9. Horrible man, that is outraging.
     
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  10. VK2019

    VK2019 Fapstronaut

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    Exactly. I have affirmations for self-love and acceptance that I read daily to change my mind. This works!
    I agree, that was a very dark place. I wished it never happen again to anyone, but that's naive.
     
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  11. Jonny1992

    Jonny1992 Fapstronaut

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    Thx buddy
     
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  12. Ishan@123

    [email protected] Fapstronaut

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    When I didn't knew bout nofap last year my third year of PMO addiction I watched 150 GB porn and relapsed 4 times and it took me whole night to wake up in my 4 year of addiction I did the same thing atleast 15-17 times and now I know bout nofap and I have started a world war against porn I will make my dream come true in last 85 days when I knew about nofap I relapsed just 8 times and now it is time to go for 90 + IT'S my day 8 going strong and my longest streak is 27 days I am getting some female attractions and I am going good I will make a 400+ streak this time
     
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  13. That was a couple of months ago, when I was deep in shemale porn. I dreamed about receiving a dick from a black shemale and I also absolutely wanted to deepthroat it. I started watching out on dating sites, but it was all rubbish, I did not find anything that matched to my perverted idea.
    So I was so annoyed that I tried to put my own dick in my mouth.
    I had ED for months, and I spent hours trying to bent my back. I was stretching and pulling on my soft dick. I was pulling so hard that I could almost feel like tearing it out.
    There was no pleasure at all. After hours, I managed to touch the tip with my tongue, but I had terrible back pain and had to stop.
    I was mad at myself and started to beat up my own soft dick. Then I got a garden hose and did an enema with warm water. I think it was too much water. I ran to the toilets and it was a huge mess with feces all over the place. I though it was over, cleaned everything up, dressed and then suddenly shit in my pants.
    As I was sharing the laundry with a friend, I was cleaning everything by hand. The whole apartment smelled like sh*t. I had it under my nails.
    The next day, my dick felt totally numb, there were bruises on my ass, I still had diarrhea and worst of all: I had a terrible pain in my back, I was afraid that I got a serious injury in my spine, I could hardly move. But I did not go to see the doc.
    It was so humiliating. I felt like a sick pervert.
    Until then I had the belief that "all people watch porn and masturbate" But this time I knew for sure that there must be like no people at all who are as perverted as myself.
     
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  14. I appreciate you sharing this my friend. I have done enemas to cleanse the bowels when I’m doing juice cleanses but I can completely laugh that those even when done for innocuous reasons make us uncomfortable and the place Can very much smell like shit. Lol.

    I actually laughed a little reading the garden hose. How did you get a garden hose into your apt ? Wow. Glad you are able to share and walk on top of this painful memory.
     
  15. It was a short garden hose that I cut off especially for that purpose. I put it inside and held the other end with my hand tightly to the water faucet. Yeah, it is funny when you think about it. But at this time I felt humiliated, beaten up and really concerned because of my back.
    The good thing is, it showed my that I had a problem. But it was for my wife, that I decided to go Hard Mode NoFap.
     
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  16. StonePlacidity

    StonePlacidity Fapstronaut

    I had suicidal thoughts when i relapsed in may after no PMO for 2 months
     
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  17. depeche69

    depeche69 Fapstronaut

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    My first time with a prostitute.
    See was absolutely beautiful, but i didn't get an errection. I was completely confused about this situation.

    Some month later i find the first hints about NoFap in the Internet. Then i tried 1 week without porn and NoFap and went back tried again prostitute. I had a hard errection and came during blowing...also i recognized during this week a completely change of my confidence, better mood, people attraction etc.

    That the first point i recognize about the Truth of NoFap
     
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  18. bms1985

    bms1985 Fapstronaut

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    Im a partner of a PA, for 16 years now. im very hurt by the lies and secrets mostly, but I 100% agree with what you say here. Feeling worthless, undeserving etc due to his past was what got him in this shit in the first place. He has told me a number of times since he doesn't deserve me. My reply is always the same - ofcourse he deserves me. I simply didn't deserve to be treated like I was. There is a huge difference.
     
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  19. Lot Yanisin

    Lot Yanisin Fapstronaut

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    eggplant thing?

    parm?
     
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  20. scarecrow1

    scarecrow1 Fapstronaut

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    That is one hell of a kick in the teeth. I guess you feel jealous of your friend?

    Never mind I think you are young and will have success with women provided you stay off the porn.
     
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