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When do hobbies become addictive ?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by BadAtChoosingNames, Dec 18, 2019.

  1. I started my quitting journey to quit porn around 11 months now and it is going forward, slowly and rough but forward.

    Right now i'm on my way to quit videogames aswell and i started to look for new hobbies to pursure. I found one which intersted me a lot in the past years and i'm still doing it to this day, "Trading Cardgames" especially Magic the Gather with real cards.
    I'm incredibly passionate about TCG's my whole life and after my friends gave me my first deck as a birthday present i started to take a deep dive into magic the gathering.

    A new passion sounds good right ? Yes and no.
    On the one hand i'm really happy having something that i can be passionate about and spend a lot of quality time with friends, strangers in card stores, just myself while building decks, showing this hobby to new people or interacting with the community.

    But a problem started to occur slowly. I start to spend more and more time with this hobby and to some degree i just think about it for hours in like university or while meeting up with friends. I started to spend more money than i would like on this hobby too, this month i spend my paycheck from my temporary job and my birthday money completly on it. I'm not in any debt or something and i'm fine with the money left, but it was a lot more than i would like to spend on it.

    It goes do some light degree in the direction of my gaming addiction (which were extremly bad) and i'm very afraid that my favourite hobby of all time becomes an addiction !

    Am i just susceptible for addictive behaviour ? Has somebody experienced something similar ?
     
  2. Di.Do.555

    Di.Do.555 Fapstronaut

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    It depends on so many factors.
    Number one factor is : am i escaping my anxious feelings and running towards this hobby?
    In other words are you self medicating using this hobby to run away from your true self?
    Obsession could be a good thing sometimes.
    Almost 99% of pioneers in all fields were obsessed with their "hobby".
    There is no success without obsession.
     
    ItsOkay likes this.
  3. Yes and no. Usually i spend time on it because i like this hobby a lot, building decks, looking at cards, playing with friends etc. It is for me a fun way to spend free time.
    But on the other hand there were a few occasions where i bought decks out of pure frustration of myself and nofap.

    Edit: I don't think i'm being obsessive about, i don't spend all day every day on magic the gathering. I passionate about going to the gym and how the body works like how losing weight works, what healthy eating is, what the body need to function good and healthy etc.
    And when i meet with friends magic is not my only topic.

    Getting rid of frustration is not it purpose but i happend on some rare occasions.
     
  4. I think thats the right attitude towards a hobby.
    Luckily i can say that that is not he case in my situation. Sure i like to spend on in, but there is a lot of other stuff i do too.
    For example i'm really passionate about going to the gym and about how healthy eating works, how much calories, how calorie intake works, what the body needs etc. So i'm on no means only interested in magic.

    But i think spending some less time on magic could be healthy for me, so i'll give it a try.
     
    engelman likes this.
  5. You cope with life by getting completely absorbed by one thing, typical behavior for people with little social life.
    What activity you do can change but core behavior does not.
    You can watch porn all day, or you can play video games all day, or you may build stuff in the garage all day, or you may collect cards all day, or watch youtube all day, or fill in the bank.
    This is not addiction it is just how you learned to deal with life. Changing that has nothing to do with behaviors themselves, it more about understanding why you do them.
    Typically it shows isolation, isolation leads to discomfort or boredom and boredom is manged by fill in the blank.
    You need to figure out what you are missing, that means doing things you do not normally do, going to places you do not normally go and spending time with other people.
     
  6. I get the point you're making and this is the same thing i told myself at the beginning of this year. I did exactly that and i developed so much because of that. It was a crazy good time.

    It would be easy to assume because of the description i gave that i'm having a little social life and bored all day, but it could not be further away from the truth. I'm a people person through and through, i got a solid amount of friends, i really enjoy spending time with friends.
    I just don't have much time to spend a lot of time with friends because of university that really takes a lot of time !

    I got one theory why this whole magic thing blew up since start of university. Maybe i try with magic the gathering to cope my situation that i can not spend so much time with friends anymore and that becomes some sort of replacement behavior.
     
  7. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    Nothing wrong with being addicted to something if it is good. I would say good things are something that require you to think or do instead of passively consuming. Or if you can make money off it.
     
  8. Everyone has friends and everyone enjoys spending time with friends. We all have social life. I do not have illusions about who you are, I do not really know you. I am mostly guessing.

    Quality of social iterations is incredibly important, they greatly affect mood and self esteem. You can be social and be miserable because of it, this happens allot. I am suggesting your relationships may not be as rewarding as they should.

    Spending too much time doing one thing indicates lack of desire to try new things. Once behavior is explored and deemed safe, you continue to stay in the "safe zone" and attempt to make it as safe as possible.
    The more you focus on one thing, the more you ignore the rest.
     

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