When I don't masturbate, I seem to have issues.

First a note that I feel for you. Girls these days dress way better than in my day. My sisters a hs teacher and SHE feels bad for all the high school dudes with all of these hormones rushing around them and have these perfect girls flaunting themselves.

plus you have all the P in the world at your fingertips.

you’re in a very tough spot and the deck is stacked against you.

You should start a reboot log (check the forums) and follow the advice of people here to get off or at least limit P. Start with a short goal of a few days. Update your log every day and read others’ posts every day. Figure out your WHY. Start practicing a few minutes of mindfulness every day. Eat right and go to the gym.

Good luck, and trust me, you will be much better off limiting/removing P early. Enjoy the real thing when your ready!

 

I think you should be able to admire - these girls are really pretty. I think you just need to have a little control (ie don’t leer, temporally limit your fantasies).

That’s great that you and the girl are doing something positive together (is also think that’s a positive sign that she could be interested.

You will be better served to have a clean mind and ready d*** (just in case)! Both will make it easier to be around her. Sounds like a very healthy situation.

And who cares about being a sub that’s just a preference.

 

Yeah, that’s the challenge you face.

At some point you have to stop the fantasy- give yourself a short time if you have to then move on. Look at her, acknowledge in your mind that she’s attractive, and let it go. Don’t obsess. Be aware of what your brain is doing. If you sit there and stare at / fantasize about the hot girl all class, you are going to work yourself into a frenzy and won’t be able to think.

Also, consider practicing mindfulness, it will help you control your mind and more easily let go of the thoughts

 

Also I re read your first post. The first few days of a reboot can be intense (I’m in day 7 and losing my mind), but after a week or so you should start to level off. Definitely look into mindfulness

 

No, I think it makes you human! Very normal to fantasize. But again, you have to turn it off, cause if you fantasize too long then like you said you get crazy horny and can’t concentrate on anything.

Also I think it’s worth noting the difference between porn and fantasizing about girls irl. The main problem w porn is the endless variety and dopamine kick. Additionally, in general, you’re better off having real intimacy than on a computer.
Fantasizing doesn’t give you the same variety and dopamine kick, but it does work you up and also objectifies women, which isn’t ideal either (though in my experience it’s hard not to).

 

Basically meditation where you pay attention to your breath. When your mind starts thinking thoughts (and it will) you notice it and shift your focus back to your breath. The act of catching your self thinking and going back to your breath is like a rep in weightlifting. The more you do it, the more you can control your brain

 

I have the same situation. Some guys seem to transfer the extra energy into being productive but never worked for me. I just try & keep it to no porn that's where problems seem to actually come from.

 

You need to find ways to cope with the real things
Masturbation is a perfect way to numb our emotions and needs.
Find a way to get your sleep right.
Find a way to get your thoughts right in class.
Find a way to ....

Our very first source of help should be our own parents.

 

Its the flatline.

 

The fact that you found this resource early, identified a problem early and recognize there's a problem today puts you light-years ahead of us over 40 guys

Basically you're feeling anxious and having a little bit of withdrawal symptoms but also around days 5-8 your T is spiking and you're experiencing unfamiliar hormonal swings because like you said you've been MO since puberty. Cut it off now...you'll appreciate life and relationships 1000 times more without sexual desires concluding every situation and starting/ finishing every day.

Keep finding materials , books, webs, audios, that support the ideas that you've discovered....no fao = good. Stick with it, and understand that it'll be challenging.

Best,
BC