When I haven't seen gf in a while i relapse

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Carrick Archibald, Mar 18, 2017.

  1. Carrick Archibald

    Carrick Archibald Fapstronaut

    So whenever i haven't seen my gf for like a 5-6days I relapse. Whenever I am with her my motivation and drive for nofap goes through the roof but then when I haven't seen her for a while I loose grip over myself!
    Any advise for how to deal with this
    Bryaan likes this.
  2. Ocean Man

    Ocean Man Fapstronaut

    Well maybe try thinking about the goal you want to accomplish. I mean there's people that will say "do it for the girl, don't fap for your girlfriend" but she might leave, and if that happens you might get down and sad. SO try to set a more personal goal. You got a girlfriend? Dayum! You know how many people just dream of cuddling a girl? I say you got a girlfriend, try to focus on other things good things that have improved with you.

    Stay strong mate! Sorry for my bad English, it's my second language.
    Bryaan likes this.
  3. choosingbetter

    choosingbetter Fapstronaut

    I agree with the above sentiment to try taking the focus off of her presence or absence and work on motivations for yourself.

    I'm not adverse to using sex with women as borrowed motivation, but I've also experienced its limitations. For example, if I thought I might have sex in the foreseeable future, I'd be that much more motivated to stay PMO free so I'd have that much more sexual energy to expend. And it worked, because I liked the idea of being that much more confident when the time came (pun not intended).

    But I noticed that I was inclined to do a chaser PMO slip a day or two later--because after the "mission" was accomplished in terms of doing the deed with her, my motivation was weakened. So I started on working on why I didn't like the PMO aftermath for myself, regardless of a partner on the horizon or not. And it's helped me a lot since then.

    Glad you posted and good luck!
    Bryaan likes this.
  4. TetsuoAkira

    TetsuoAkira Fapstronaut

    I've experienced thus in the past and my only advice is to keep yourself busy and focused on something else.

    Workout, read, yoga, meditation etc.

    There are so many things we can implement into our lives to bring new fulfillment to them, and most of the time, if we need to resort to PMO, we are lacking something else in our lives, and should learn to explore more often.
    Bryaan likes this.

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