When the urge comes knocking

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Fishn1, Sep 7, 2020.

  1. Fishn1

    Fishn1 Fapstronaut

    320
    227
    43
    I'm at the stage I always get to after about 5 days. This time around I have done my best to shut down images and lustful thoughts, stop and no seem to work or focusing on something else or remembering the pain from the last episode. However, I also reach a physical craving that doesn't seem totally connected with thinking. Sensations, horniness, a feeling down there - this is the toughest thing for me. Any advice?
     
  2. Love2LongBoard

    Love2LongBoard Fapstronaut

    151
    290
    63
    You are making an assumption that we all make: That the craving you are feeling will be met by acting out or looking at pornography. Viewing pornography or acting out is like drinking caffeine when you are dehydrated. There is an initial feeling of being hydrated but it actually dehydrates you faster, requiring you to drink more.

    The feelings that you feel will not be solved by acting out, it will only lead to more cravings. You may not be thinking about lusting after others, but there is wrong thinking still that leads to acting out. It's that thinking that needs to be rewired.

    Here is another one. "I am abstaining". While that is a true statement it is not a helpful statement. Try this instead, "I am giving myself freedom." They mean the same thing, but one is about denying yourself something that you think you want while the other is about giving yourself something you need.

    Give yourself the gift of peace of mind, a healthy life, healthy thinking, freedom to relate to others.

    Not sure if this is what you are looking for but hopefully it can help some.
     
  3. Fishn1

    Fishn1 Fapstronaut

    320
    227
    43
    Yes it did thanks. Changing thinking habits is really key and when I come up with everything I've done before like above, it's habit and just as important an excuse to act out which will lead back to the cycle. Appreciate your logic.
     
  4. If you can do 5, you can do 6. No cheating, no searching, no looking at anything sexy or porn related. Think about the guy you'd like to become and do it a day at a time. Also, when you get to a week - stop counting the days! Forget the past and only focus on today & tomorrow.
     
  5. @Valley_Warrior this is good
     
    Fishn1 likes this.
  6. Fishn1

    Fishn1 Fapstronaut

    320
    227
    43
    One day at a time for sure, thanks.
     
  7. ElizabethManning

    ElizabethManning Fapstronaut

    7
    5
    3
    You need a girlfriend...
     
    +TenPercent likes this.
  8. Fishn1

    Fishn1 Fapstronaut

    320
    227
    43
    I'm married so that's not my problem, just have the same problem many others do whether single or married.
     
  9. Love2LongBoard

    Love2LongBoard Fapstronaut

    151
    290
    63
    For those who read the reply above: finding a girlfriend doesn't solve anything. It actually just makes it way more painful for you and for the girl you subject to this. Get healthy, then find a girlfriend.
     
  10. Fishn1

    Fishn1 Fapstronaut

    320
    227
    43
    I'm finding by doing this all the self limiting beliefs I have about myself and the way I've punished myself for so long. Not just for this, but in general. I've started talking back to myself rationally. We can't let the bullies inside us dominate. Fortunately it's not all the time but it's there. This is not just about porn. This is a definite challenge in more than one way.
     
    Seascape likes this.
  11. Habbapop

    Habbapop Fapstronaut

    204
    240
    43
    Ride the wave man. The feelings thoughts and outher stuff. You can't shut it down, you have go with it, see it as a wave coming into land. It get bigger and bigger but it will go away and go back out in the oacen. That is life, there will allways come wave @ you. Sometime bigger sometimes smaller. This is probobly big waves cous all the shit you have been suppressing with porn. feelings, guilt, blame and all. BUT you can do it, just like many here. Ride the wave. Grab your surfingboard and ride the wave till it dissapears.

    Goodluck my man !
     
    Seascape and Fishn1 like this.
  12. Fishn1

    Fishn1 Fapstronaut

    320
    227
    43
    Thank you buddy, great reply appreciate it.
     

Share This Page