Where do i find girls besides internet?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by JJTorres, Jul 13, 2018.

  1. JJTorres

    JJTorres Fapstronaut

    I tried Art workshops but they're costly or far, in church theres only one girl but is in a relationship, facebook female friends of my friend are engaged or are older or younger...
    What should i do to meet a girl in real life? Besides online dating sites where there are girls nearby none is interested in me...
  2. Church events and local community events. I'm honestly struggling with this too. The dudes I'm interested in are either in a relationship, about to get married, are married, or are not interested in me. I've just been practicing being patient and focusing on improving myself and not so much on dating but some days are harder than others.
  3. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

  4. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    Volunteer for a cause you support. I’m female and it’s almost always more women than men that volunteer times two.
  5. JJTorres

    JJTorres Fapstronaut

    Thanks guys for your advice ill try it out.
  6. tweeby

    tweeby Banned

    Everything and anything, join as many dating sites as possible, 'don't hold out on this one though'

    Social clubs, salsa dance classes, expand your friend circle (this is the best if you can do it)
  7. Roady

    Roady Fapstronaut

    I think: the best solution is: stop watching out for girls.

    Begin doing what you like to do. That will show up the real version of yourself and makes you attractive to girls.
    Girls feel it when they are the fulfilling of your life in stead of a valuable addition to your already fulfilled life.
    Joe dalton, Faramir and Mike Bonanno like this.
  8. JJTorres

    JJTorres Fapstronaut

    Well right now the things i like are that im doing are:

    Enjoy outdoor countryside nature.
    Watching t.v., Netflix, tv series, movies, tv game shows.
    Internet research-Self discovery
    Giving things to ppl.(Gifts)
    Soaking prayer
    The spiritual world
  9. vitatertot

    vitatertot Fapstronaut

    If you like to exercise, join a gym. Sounds like most of the stuff you've been doing is self centered and something you can do on your own. Find something that lots of people love to do, and stick with it. When you go somewhere on the regular, people start to know you. Join a martial arts gym, a rock climbing center, volunteer, whatever. Find something that people go to and stick to it. Are you in college? What age are you? Much different scenario if you're in your 40's than if you're 15. or 20. If you're in your teens or college, literally just meet people at college. If you're in your employment age, you may have to frequent coffee shops. The key is don't go out TO MEET A GIRL. THAT'S DUMB. And honestly creepy. The key is you need to have a SOCIAL. LIFE. live your life outside, in public places. Don't read a book at home: Go to the library. Don't sit inside and watch netflix, go to the movie theatre. Say hello to the person selling you tickets and food. Go to church. In everything you do, do it in public, with people. Say hello to the grocery clerk. You have to develop social skills first. Then it comes naturally, and you can start to be interesting. here's the secret:: LITERALLY HALF OF THE PEOPLE ON EARTH ARE GIRLS. So don't go looking for one, just go where people are. Literally isn't that hard.
    Good luck man, If you need any advice, just reply to the comment.
    FOCUS ON YOURSELF, don't be selfish, but focus on self improvement. Live each day like a challenge. Say hello to one more person.

    Start by saying hello.
    Then ask how are you.
    Then ask them how their day is going.
    Gradually make it your routine to start conversations with people.

    This is honestly the dumbest thing to have to learn, but for a generation that literally has been stuck indoors and doesn't know how to socialize, you gotta start with the basics.

    Good luck man.
    goodnice, JJTorres and RealMe like this.
  10. MiawPowPow

    MiawPowPow Fapstronaut

    One good way is to volunteer to events. It's a nice way to meet new people and feel good to be part of the community. Once you start volunteering to event (I mainly do sports event) you'll get call a few times per year. I've worked with alot of cool people and met tons of nice friends and potentiel girlfriend. It's a great way to go outside your daily community and find some genuine people that love what you love.

    I personnaly like dating site, I think they are simple and good to meet girls you would of never met. You just have to be open and you'll find someone genuine and live happely after.

    Finally, ask you friends girlfriend if they have any friends that are single, often they do and they can set you up on a blind date, which is really exciting and makes you live an adventure from the start.

    Good luck with all that!
    JJTorres likes this.
  11. AlphaReborn

    AlphaReborn Fapstronaut

    I think cold approaching is the best way to start a conversation with girls. It's like this: 1) IOIs like looking at you and smiling
    2) Approaching from the front
    3) Saying something to pickup the conversation. But not any lame pickup lines.
    4) Conversing
    5) Walk away with her
    6) Ask for her no.
    It's that simple, not so complicated.
    Ephrem likes this.
  12. JJTorres

    JJTorres Fapstronaut

    I havevtrouble with #1
  13. superninjared

    superninjared Fapstronaut

    No offence to anyone but meeting girls is supposed to be natural. We have forgotten how to be human... Look at what society, social media, technology and the governments have done to us. Turned us into robots who don't even know how to communicate in real life. Forever hiding behind a screen... People and girls are EVERYWHERE. You are over thinking this whole Where do i find girls besides internet? thing. Just have an abundance mindset you can meet anyone, anywhere. Just leave the house and you will find people its that simple. Bus stop, train station, super market, cinema, park etc...

    I think the real problem here is the social anxiety. Doing approaches. I have it too so i can relate thats why i use online dating and apps a lot. So if you want to meet girls in real life you are going to have to work on your anxiety and doing approaches. Only then will your eyes truly open to the opeurtnunites that are around you. At the moment it is like you have a blanket over your eyes hiding you from the truth. The real world. No offence i feel it too. Life long journey...
  14. AlphaReborn

    AlphaReborn Fapstronaut

    Here is an Idea to use next time. When you are going to game, Just smile at all the girls you find hot. If she doesn't smile either she got a boyfriend or she isn't sexually available at the time. The girls who smile back are available. You just need to game them. The smile method and the gaze methods are the best IOIs I've ever seen.
    Game is not unnatural, it's called courtship. All animals use the same basic principles of courtship. It's just that we humans got into porn and fucked this generation up. And, if you have a frame with confidence and self-belief, you can pass any shit tests girls give you. If she shit tests you, it's not a bad thing. It's a good thing, it means she is interested in you and she wants to test your will and know more about you. The main type of shit test I receive is " I only date guys who are six feet" Most guys would get butthurt and complain like cocksuckers if they hear this. You just have to amplify the frame. For example,
    maybe a girl makes fun of you for driving a Prius.

    “Oh, you must pull all the girls with that Prius,” she says. What would 99% of guys do? They’d get defensive.

    “B-BUT The Prius is a very good economic choice due to its good fuel economy!” or something more subtle like “I bought it for financial reasons, not to pick up girls!” Instead of getting defensive, The first way to pass a shit test is to agree with the girl, and take it to another level.
    “Yeah, I pull all the girls with my Prius.” or “Yeah, girls tell me my Prius is hot.”
    Do you see how this is amplifying the frame? The frame that the girl sets at first is “You must pull girls with your Prius.” Obviously she’s saying it sarcastically, but it doesn’t matter—if you amplify the frame, you’ll pass the shit test.
    Just take her frame (You pull girls with your Prius) and multiply it by 10. That’s what those two comments do—they convey the fact that yes, you do in fact pull girls with your Prius.
    Obviously she’s going to know you’re joking, but you still passed the test—these comments show her that you’re not insecure about your car. You just go with the joke.
    This is how it works bro.
    _Xavier_ likes this.
  15. JJTorres

    JJTorres Fapstronaut

    Great counsel thanks yet about the smiling, its like lifting a 200 pound weight for me. And if i do smile, i look ackward, or my smile for that matter.
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2018
    AlphaReborn likes this.
  16. Faramir

    Faramir Fapstronaut

    I think two of the best places to meet women/girls are school and work. Just being with the same people every day helps to build camaraderie which can lead to friendships or more. As you develop a friendship with a classmate/coworker, she may feel more comfortable spending time with you one-on-one. I think this makes it easier to be successful in these environments, as opposed to trying to talk to random girls on the street or girls who you're meeting for the first time, who may feel scared by you initiating a conversation.
    JJTorres likes this.
  17. House parties bud
  18. Girls are literally everywhere.

    There's about 18+ different girls that live like 2 blocks away.
    There's dozens that clamor in bars that are like 5 blocks away.
    There's some that like to hang with their girlfriends during the day to have fun. Those, btw, are some of the best times to look for the really high quality girls because the chances of finding a 9 or 10 in the city is pretty high depending on where you go and the time of day. By the by, when you DO see one (and you KNOW when you see one), you'll notice that they are SMART, EDUCATED, and have a POSITIVE outlook on their lives, which are really attractive traits to have not only as a girlfriend, not only as a boyfriend either, but for everyone. That's the kind of outlook we could all have, by the way.

    Short version: Daytime is more romantic. Nighttime is alot more sensual.

    No one is telling you that you HAVE to approach them, of course. But then again, we all gotta start somewhere, even if it's pretty darn small like that old fat lunch server lady that works at the local Chick Fil' A. Change is initially uncomfortable, my guy. But that's the thing. Change is SUPPOSED to feel uncomfortable initially because you are implementing a new neural pathway for a skill or habit that you would like to obtain, and this un-comfortableness tends to peak in the earliest stages of a new execution, much like someone who is first trying to shoot a basketball into a basket for the first time.

    That's when visualizing, or imagining yourself performing a sequenced set of actions, comes in handy.

    Anyways, I would also listen to AlphaReborn's post, though I assume you've gleaned some nuggets of wisdom already. ^^


    Go join a hobby circle or something. Preferably a circle that has the same favorite hobby as you. Or a cause. That works too.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 28, 2018
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  19. AlphaReborn

    AlphaReborn Fapstronaut

    I know the awkward smile dude, It's easy to do the hot smile. Squeak eyes a little and don't smile with your mouth. Smile with the eyes. It's easy to learn these 'Basic Human Communications'.

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