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Where to next?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Aotearoa, Oct 5, 2019.

  1. Aotearoa

    Aotearoa Fapstronaut

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    I do all this shit only to get rejected and dumped. I follow a strict daily routine where I must at least do 150 pushups, 150 dumb bell curls, study for at least half an hour, take cold showers etc etc but it appears I am still not good enough for people. What must I do and what the fuck else can I possibly do to elevate myself?
     
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2019
    Deleted Account likes this.
  2. JohnnyGamer003

    JohnnyGamer003 New Fapstronaut

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    Hey Bro,

    New to the forum and currently on day 4 (lol). First just wanted to congratulate you on 87 days which is crazy. But talking about what you were discussing this is a very interesting problem I have always been facing. I have learned that not thinking of what others think is the best. Don't let others be your expectations. You decide your own expectations and only work on becoming a better version of yourself. Also, I have learned that discipline is also very important. These are the moments where your self will is tested in almost every way and could just potentially lead to a relapse. NoFap helps a lot by making you feel gratitude towards yourself and other things. Whenever I stumble towards one of these thought moments where you think it's not working, I just realize there are people that are going through much worse, and just making excuses to try and relapse. Hey, I mean just think about. The fact that you have a internet connection, a device which accesses the internet full of so many potential, almost 65% of the world doesn't. If you have clothes, food and a roof over your head you shouldn't be worrying about much except how you can become better and help elevate others. Just try to have a tough discipline and you've gone almost 87 days on Nofap, so don't let others judgement intimidate you in any way, know why you're doing and focus on your roots, and just grind...
    anyways that was pretty long but, I'm still working on figuring this out also so hope this helped
     
    A41:14A, Coffee Candy and Aotearoa like this.
  3. Aotearoa

    Aotearoa Fapstronaut

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    I appreciate your eloquent and measured response. Sometimes I feel like just giving up but I have to keep going for the greater good. This shit hurts, man.
     
  4. JohnnyGamer003

    JohnnyGamer003 New Fapstronaut

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    I know I feel you all the way man, but this is what shapes us and makes you stronger. There was a Youtube video earlier of someone injecting testosterone to boost their gym performance (dumbest shit ever). Just think of how far you've gotten, which 87 days is crazy, and the fact that you're superior to like everyone around you because not everyone can have the will to go 87 days on NoFap. Just keep on grinding and I'm hoping so bad to get to 90 days, I basically deleted instagram and all the other girl-hubs lol
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 18, 2019
  5. JohnnyGamer003

    JohnnyGamer003 New Fapstronaut

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    just wanted to add that you're literally a warrior bro. To go 87 days, and some mf's out here injecting themselves with testosterone is sad.
     
    Coffee Candy and Aotearoa like this.
  6. May the issue isn't you, it's them. Sounds like you are focused and growing into the best version of your self possible. Most of us are on that lifelong journey! Don't let (humble 2 cents) ever make you feel less than or not good enough.
     
    Coffee Candy and JohnnyGamer003 like this.
  7. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    Bro I would say you are putting off real issues you know you have and justifying whatever you are doing now as important so you can further procrastinate addressing the real issues. I do the same shit, I read and tell myself I am improving myself when really I am just putting off doing a hard assignment or something. Don't just mimic some random shit you see on this forum, really sit down and ask yourself what kind of results you want and what you need to do to get there. Ask yourself where you want to be in a year (or whatever time frame) then set short, medium and long term goals that will get you there. Short term goals should be the most specific, long term the least specific.

    Here is an example. Lets say you want to be bigger and stronger (longer term goal, very general 'picture' of what you want to acheive). To do this you know you need to learn about diet and training, as well as actually go to the gym and eat properly (medium term goal, involves action but not very specific). If you are starting from square one your short term goals might be to spend 20 minutes tonight and tomorrow finding a beginner program and diet and find a gym nearby to sign up to. Once you have completed those the next goal is to actually go to the gym and do one workout. Then you might realise you don't know enough recipes to feed yourself so the next goal is to cook one new meal a week. Then you start to set goals for weights to hit, eg. in two months I want to gain 2kg of bodyweight and add 5kg to my deadlift.

    Stop doing this bullshit daily habit self-improvement stuff and use the method I have outlined to analyse each facet of your life and set goals for yourself. Stop looking for one new daily habit that is going to change everything, there isn't one. You probably just sit down and stare at your open book for half an hour and say 'Thats half an hour up! Done my study for today.', rather than actively engaging with the content.

    Its going to take time to. That's okay. Slowly you will get better at setting goals for yourself, you will understand how you work best and set goals according to that. You will accumalate value with each goal you complete. You may not notice the progress but it adds up and over time you will become a completely new person.
     
    JohnnyGamer003 likes this.
  8. PancanBoy

    PancanBoy Fapstronaut

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    Rejection is okay. Failure is okay. Keep practicing and keep trying. You will be successful at some point.

    Practice socialization skills. Put yourself around people more. Read two books by Dale Carnegie, "How to Win Friends and Influence People" is good but a little aged, and "The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking." Try "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill. Now all these books are filled with information. What you will not experience while reading them is knowledge and wisdom. To earn those, you must practice. Keep practicing.
     

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