why am I so lonely? Why nobody wants me or pursue me?

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by zeke27, Nov 19, 2021.

  1. In response to this, it doesn't have anything to do with you.

    It's just the way adulthood is.
  2. zeke27

    zeke27 Fapstronaut

    IDK. Maybe people see me as a source of something instead of a friendship.
  3. It's not targeted at you. They are just out to pay the rent, they don't care how.
    zeke27 likes this.
  4. Adon1s

    Adon1s Fapstronaut

    Don't take it personal. We all have to go through a lot of people like that. Today I had drinks with a few girls before they went to another party. Worst case scenario is that they only wanted to be with me for the free drinks, and that worst case scenario gave me social experience that makes me better equipped to find girls who want me for me. So even the worst case scenario is good for me. We can't expect to find our soulmate on the first try, but we fail forwards. Every "failure" is a step forward on the path of success.
    I'm not vaccinated either. Most people around me are vaccinated, but when I'm honest they open up and tell me that it wasn't totally "free will". It's all about how you formulate it. To be honest I'm not vaccinated because I think it's stupid, but I say I'm not vaccinated because I don't have the balls to do it and most people accept that phrasing.
    zeke27 likes this.
  5. I'm with you on the vaccination issue. I just don't think these people are sick because of "corona virus". A few could be, but there is no time-tested studies. Also, there's no proof that this "vaccine" has any efficacy, and could be dangerous.
    zeke27 likes this.
  6. zeke27

    zeke27 Fapstronaut

    It's not about having balls to be vaccinated, it's the side effects, I am not afraid of those effects though, but personally, I think getting or not vaccinated is a personal decision, no one can make you make that decision but you, maybe I am healthy enough and I don't get the side effects but this shit doesn't protect you from the virus nonetheless so why getting it? What's the point in getting it? When someone forces you to do something against your will prohibiting you and threaten you with your food, your work and even your household, you lose your dignity and that is what makes us human.
  7. Mr.Tony

    Mr.Tony Fapstronaut

    I'm 28 years old soon 30 haven't talked or touched any Girl's hand in Years...

    It's okay to be lonely, Just use it to Improve yourself and become the ultimate version of yourself.

    Somehow despite that, It motivates me!
  8. Because getting a woman is more a burden than a bonus.

    Most men find that out too late.
    Mr.Tony likes this.
  9. zeke27

    zeke27 Fapstronaut

    You might be right bro. It’s because I haven’t experience it but maybe, at the end, it will not represent anything for me… who knows. The thing is, the pressure from society and watching other couples being happy, makes you want that too
  10. liveFreeOrDie

    liveFreeOrDie Fapstronaut

    Based on the data I've looked at I've come to a very similar conclusion, and personally I've opted out. Regardless of how or why, you should be proud of yourself for having the guts to stand against the crowd. I feel the stress of my decision here in the states, and it's not nearly as bad here as elsewhere. Hang in there and keep doing what you believe is right.

    I feel you with the loneliness, makes this whole challenge harder for me, too. I've had a couple short-lived relationships, but nothing serious in the end. Something I often tell myself, though, is that cannot I control the people around, but I can control myself. You say that you're not an interesting person? Well, the good news is you can control that. What do you think would make you an interesting person? It doesn't have to be much, find something you like and start pursuing it in your free time. Preferably, it challenges you by being just on the limits of what you think you're capable of. I was blown away when I learned that exposing yourself to new situations turns on inactive parts of your DNA to code for new proteins to handle the new situations. When you stretch yourself out of your comfort zone, you literally unlock more of your potential.

    I used to think the exact same thing of myself, and began working to remedy it. I'm lucky enough to have a job that pays well and I have relatively low expenses, so I picked up SCUBA diving. Hasn't scored me any girls yet, but I discovered something: I FREAKIN' LOVE DIVING. Now I've started to get to know people in the local diving community. Obviously, diving isn't for everybody, but the point is that I set out to improve myself and discovered a whole new passion I never would've known I had.

    Don't beat yourself up about it, that's not useful. Think of it as your brain sending a signal that you have more potential you could unlock. Find the something that interests you, and start working at it. See where it goes. If you find you don't like, no real loss, look for something else. When you find something you do like, invest more in it, and see where that goes.

    Hope this is helpful. I feel I have the same struggle, so I guess it's kinda therapeutic for me to write out my thoughts.

    Also, I just want to say, I've never met you, but I know that:
    1) You have the courage to stand against a society when everyone tells you, "you're wrong".
    2) You're introspective
    3) You're trying to improve your life, starting with yourself.

    That's not how I would describe an "uninteresting" person.
    zeke27 likes this.
  11. zeke27

    zeke27 Fapstronaut

    I really like your answer. I will read it every day. You have insight on this
  12. Definitely that can make you feel left out.

    The part you aren't seeing in that moment is watching that guy work like a dog
    and take on debt to support her.

    And for? What? An O? This is a ten minute thing.

    How much will you pay for ten minutes?

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