Recov
Fapstronaut
Please understand that some terms that can be seen as triggers will be used.
I give partial credit for some of the material presented to Reddit user u/MagnivusPrime, who made a post in [url="https://www.reddit.com/r/TGandSissyRecovery/comments/tk1lsf/the_lie_you_lie_to_yourself/"] "r/TGandSissyRecovery" [/url].
A question I've always asked myself and ended up hating myself for. The shame that accompanied the answer that I was just "less of a man" than others, the shame that pairs with the pleasure to make a love-hate relationship.
I am a victim of this ideology.
In this post, I will:
There is a large portion of my life where I have felt alienated and un-connected, typically derived from some moments where I have felt "awkward" and/or couldn't handle my emotions when spoken to or interacting with peers. I also feel alienated because I've failed numerous times to take knowledge/advice from elders and have it resonate within me - I've lived a lot of my life doing things without understanding the true meaning of doing so. This feeling of being un-connected lingers within me in my day-to-day life. Many things I'd done in this life have been under the assumption that I am incapable. This constant fear-based attitude leads to low confidence in my decisions and in my being, rendering me to become slow or passive. Both traits that I despise in a Man. Yet, I've had this attitude for the majority of my life.
These attitudes brought about the use of mechanisms whereby I cope with the 'fact' that I'm slow/passive/incapable. Some of these mechanisms are seeking approval from others, comparing myself to others in order to 'class' myself, and making it known to myself over and over that, I am doing something wrong in order to affirm the 'truth' that "I am incapable" if I do fail.
Sissy/ Humiliation Porn - Why we enjoy it
Now, back to sissy porn and why it should NOT be the main focus.
Put aside the fact that you like this genre of porn for a moment - accept that you are or have been attracted to it:
When 'sissies' are in their 'sissy/submissive' mode, many (from r/TGandSissyRecovery) have confessed that, being the 'girl'. Identifying with the girl, is what turns them on, and since they are turned on by it, it must be true right? To identify as a girl?
Let's think about that for a second.
No. It is not true. Say for example, when you are at home alone, masturbating with a dildo, why are you enjoying it? Do you enjoy it because you like a stick being inserted in and out of your asshole? Are you enjoying it for that reason? Or are you telling yourself whilst you do it, that you are "I'm such a slut for taking this dick, such a sissy, blah blah blah"? Right? That is what makes it enjoyable. Who are you without the voice that tells you who you are? There is no such thing as a sissy, it's a cultural made-up ideology. There's only you, and you, are you. You are not a woman, not a man, not Christian, not Muslim, not nothing. There's simply you, who exists in a world where so many factors are trying to push you to feel a certain way. The choice here lies in your hands - Do you want to keep telling yourself who you are?
You might think, "Well, so what? I like it, I don't care that it tells me who I am"
I thought so too.
I once saw a therapy session where a depressed and stubborn man in his thirties who felt insignificant because he was a virgin and was sick of porn was telling his therapist how bad he was as a person. The man had some events as a child where he felt bullied/lonely/insignificant. The therapist showed him that he only feels that way because the depressed man was drilling that he was incapable in his own mind over and over through the many mechanisms and mannerisms he unconsciously created. It took a few tries to get this through, but when this was pointed out to the depressed man, he laughed beautifully for the first time in years, as if something so obvious was told to him but he never ever grasped the idea of it. Traumas and events in the past make you believe things that you would be against if they were brought up to you in the present. So, just because you had a bad situation in the past, why should your ideology be based on something you don't want to believe in?
Sissy porn, works on 'telling yourself who you are', look, for example; at all the captions and sissy hypnosis porn. its unshameful [url="https://www.google.com/search?q=Interpellation&rlz=1C1ONGR_en-GBGB929GB929&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8"] "Interpellation" [/url]
In my opinion, every person who's into this porn has a trauma or events that lead them to believe that they are incapable and worthless human beings. That they exist to please others. You might read this and think, "no I'm not...", put your ego aside, because avoiding your past means you will never see peace.
You enjoy it so much because it relates to your invented ideology.
You don't have to force yourself to want to quit, do what makes you feel at peace. However, I'm starting to see my past for what it is as well as the sissy porn I use to affirm with.
Practice meditation. It's really important to be in a state of mind where you feel unaffected. Give up/Moderate your animal desires. Understand when you use your coping mechanisms and just observe when you do them. Notice the times when you seek approval from others. Know why you do them.
The first step to recovery is not abstaining from sissy porn. It's understanding why you needed it.
Let me know your thoughts and if I have missed anything you think is worthy.
I give partial credit for some of the material presented to Reddit user u/MagnivusPrime, who made a post in [url="https://www.reddit.com/r/TGandSissyRecovery/comments/tk1lsf/the_lie_you_lie_to_yourself/"] "r/TGandSissyRecovery" [/url].
A question I've always asked myself and ended up hating myself for. The shame that accompanied the answer that I was just "less of a man" than others, the shame that pairs with the pleasure to make a love-hate relationship.
I am a victim of this ideology.
In this post, I will:
- Share a short summary of how I have coped with life since childhood (this may relate to you, so I ask that you read it)
- My understanding and acceptance of how this porn genre affects me and why I will no longer entertain it.
- Share why the first step to recovery is NOT abstaining from porn.
There is a large portion of my life where I have felt alienated and un-connected, typically derived from some moments where I have felt "awkward" and/or couldn't handle my emotions when spoken to or interacting with peers. I also feel alienated because I've failed numerous times to take knowledge/advice from elders and have it resonate within me - I've lived a lot of my life doing things without understanding the true meaning of doing so. This feeling of being un-connected lingers within me in my day-to-day life. Many things I'd done in this life have been under the assumption that I am incapable. This constant fear-based attitude leads to low confidence in my decisions and in my being, rendering me to become slow or passive. Both traits that I despise in a Man. Yet, I've had this attitude for the majority of my life.
These attitudes brought about the use of mechanisms whereby I cope with the 'fact' that I'm slow/passive/incapable. Some of these mechanisms are seeking approval from others, comparing myself to others in order to 'class' myself, and making it known to myself over and over that, I am doing something wrong in order to affirm the 'truth' that "I am incapable" if I do fail.
Sissy/ Humiliation Porn - Why we enjoy it
Now, back to sissy porn and why it should NOT be the main focus.
Put aside the fact that you like this genre of porn for a moment - accept that you are or have been attracted to it:
When 'sissies' are in their 'sissy/submissive' mode, many (from r/TGandSissyRecovery) have confessed that, being the 'girl'. Identifying with the girl, is what turns them on, and since they are turned on by it, it must be true right? To identify as a girl?
Let's think about that for a second.
No. It is not true. Say for example, when you are at home alone, masturbating with a dildo, why are you enjoying it? Do you enjoy it because you like a stick being inserted in and out of your asshole? Are you enjoying it for that reason? Or are you telling yourself whilst you do it, that you are "I'm such a slut for taking this dick, such a sissy, blah blah blah"? Right? That is what makes it enjoyable. Who are you without the voice that tells you who you are? There is no such thing as a sissy, it's a cultural made-up ideology. There's only you, and you, are you. You are not a woman, not a man, not Christian, not Muslim, not nothing. There's simply you, who exists in a world where so many factors are trying to push you to feel a certain way. The choice here lies in your hands - Do you want to keep telling yourself who you are?
You might think, "Well, so what? I like it, I don't care that it tells me who I am"
I thought so too.
I once saw a therapy session where a depressed and stubborn man in his thirties who felt insignificant because he was a virgin and was sick of porn was telling his therapist how bad he was as a person. The man had some events as a child where he felt bullied/lonely/insignificant. The therapist showed him that he only feels that way because the depressed man was drilling that he was incapable in his own mind over and over through the many mechanisms and mannerisms he unconsciously created. It took a few tries to get this through, but when this was pointed out to the depressed man, he laughed beautifully for the first time in years, as if something so obvious was told to him but he never ever grasped the idea of it. Traumas and events in the past make you believe things that you would be against if they were brought up to you in the present. So, just because you had a bad situation in the past, why should your ideology be based on something you don't want to believe in?
Sissy porn, works on 'telling yourself who you are', look, for example; at all the captions and sissy hypnosis porn. its unshameful [url="https://www.google.com/search?q=Interpellation&rlz=1C1ONGR_en-GBGB929GB929&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8"] "Interpellation" [/url]
In my opinion, every person who's into this porn has a trauma or events that lead them to believe that they are incapable and worthless human beings. That they exist to please others. You might read this and think, "no I'm not...", put your ego aside, because avoiding your past means you will never see peace.
You enjoy it so much because it relates to your invented ideology.
You don't have to force yourself to want to quit, do what makes you feel at peace. However, I'm starting to see my past for what it is as well as the sissy porn I use to affirm with.
Practice meditation. It's really important to be in a state of mind where you feel unaffected. Give up/Moderate your animal desires. Understand when you use your coping mechanisms and just observe when you do them. Notice the times when you seek approval from others. Know why you do them.
The first step to recovery is not abstaining from sissy porn. It's understanding why you needed it.
Let me know your thoughts and if I have missed anything you think is worthy.