Why are you doing nofap

When I quit smoking 4 years ago, I realized so much of my life was just some version of inhaling cigarette smoke to stave off withdrawals, in some form or another. I became interested in what was real and what was inauthentic. I also saw that most pleasure had a price, and that in pursuing pleasure as a god you run the risk of being a puppet to someone or something, if not both.

 

- I don't want to surrender to my own desires
- I don't want to view women as a sexual object, I want to get rid of sexual/horny feeling towards girls despite their beauty, I want to control my emotions better and not be manipulated while being around with girls... I want to respect them.
- I don't want to live in a shameful life
- I don't want to let my sexuality/lust take control of my life

- I want to be a better man
- I want to be a scientist, a writer, a polyglot... I want to become anyone I want to be, therefore I need to get rid of all unhealthy dopaminergic activities
- I want to be happy, and more sociable
- I want to live to the fullest daily
- ...

There are many reasons I want to do NoFap...

 

Its the missing piece in my journey towards self-discovery and the root of all my problems in life.

It must end.

 

'Cause porn is bad, mmkay?

The church told me it was bad for a laundry list of reasons, many of which make sense outside religion, some that don't. Regardless, I used erotic fantasy and M, often accompanied by a softcore image, to cope with life and to go to sleep since age 12. That M aid of a softcore image grew to increasingly harder still images, erotic flashgames, erotic lit, and eventually streamed video P into adulthood. It followed me into marriage and kids, and I could never stop of my own volition longer than 2 weeks. Other life circumstances caused me to grow disenchanted with the church, but I was mostly angry that they never gave me good tools to beat P. They talked endlessly about how bad it was and how it disconnected me from God and my wife etc., and they quoted scripture, they told me to pray it out, they told me to get accountability, they told me to "lay it at the feet of Jesus," they offered testimonials, but nothing worked.
I had given up and was despondently trying to come to terms with my addiction since I couldn't beat it. I thought, maybe the church was wrong about homosexuality so maybe they are wrong about all kinds of sexuality, and all this Ming is natural and good and the depression I feel is coming from decades of rejecting my true self. Maybe I'm just a horny boy and nothing will change it. Maybe I was not biologically built to be pair bonded with a single woman, but if I want to stay with my wife I need to curtail that tendency, and P is a good way to do that rather than sheer sexual repression like the church taught. I didn't really buy into any of these thoughts, I was just trying to find a way to make life have some sense and get as comfortable as I could in the place I was at, because I obviously couldn't change.

Then I read an article in TIME about Alex Rhodes and NoFap. It was sheer chance too, I am almost never in a position to read TIME, but I did and everything resonated. Here was a secular source echoing everything that had made sense to me about the evil of P, a pro S but anti P guy, but most of all, someone who could offer a clear, straightforward, and effective way to quit P forever.
After spending time here, reading exactly what P does to a person not just physically, but emotionally and relationally, and seeing exactly what it does in a marriage, I'd say it was worse than what church said. Oh sure, they were like "It will damage your marriage!" but only in the sense that your wife wouldn't like it, they didn't tell me what it would do to me even if she didn't know. They were like, "It makes God sad!" and you know what, that's too abstract. A lot of things make God sad. I needed something more concrete. NoFap made everything more real, and gave me the tools to quit. But I also got depression and my therapist said I should quit NoFap so I did, addressed some of the other side factors while keeping the addiction moderately deescalated and now I'm back. Hopefully I complete a good reboot this time.

 

I want to be free and in control, I want to achieve full mastery of self. Channeling my sexual energy into building the life I desire.

 

Got desperate one day. Needed help.

 

To completely remove sexuality from my life. I don't want children so there's no need for me to be sexual.

 

I want to become the best version of myself.

 

Because i feel way better. I dont like to jerk off everyday no more. Its disgusting and self manipulating. I want to have the Controll about every aspect of my Life. I dont want to be the slave of some pixel Girls i dont even know. I dont like Porn anymore. Most of it is just Acting, nothing else.
This Urge just for Genitals of a Girl is stupid, it feels simply not right. Never felt.

I dont knew wich Impact on my life Fapping had. No one told me so i never tried to keep my Testosterone on other Levels. They always told us "Fapping is noct a Problem". Now i know much better.
Thats why. Wish i had known of this 20 years earlier.

 

Because if I cannot control my impulses and lust I'm no better than a horny monkey.
Also because is slowly killing me and destroying my physical and mental health.

 

I'm doing nofap because it was ruining my life. Sapping my energy and motivation to do anything. I was masturbating all the time that I wanted to be doing other things instead. I want to build up myself by doing nofap. Once I've built myself up enough I'll either stay celibate or get a kanojo.