I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now in a long-distance relationship, which I know is one of the key factors to his porn addiction. For the last 3 years, I have expressed to him that watching or looking at porn is kind of a deal-breaker for me since I wouldn't do it to him. Around this time he told me that he has a pretty extreme foot fetish he found out he had when he was with me. After snooping and spying (I know it's bad) I would find out he was doing it again, which I knew the whole time but chose to ignore the lingering pit in my stomach, every so often around every six months I would find something and we would get into some pretty bad fights but he would always promise to never do it again. Not only did the porn bother me but he would lie so much about other little things like when he would go to sleep or if he took a shower or not which caused a lot more anxiety for me and magnified the porn issue. We have had a lot of problems but this year was really the year we began to heal our relationship but the big issue was his porn addiction. Last month he came to visit (after a year and a half because of covid) and the first thing I find is porn. But it wasn't just porn. It was hentai and it was tens of thousands of pictures and of course, it was an explosive fight and he swore up and down not to do it again and begged me to forgive him. So I did. To find out a week after he left he never did. Again another round of begging and promising. Again a week later. This time we made a plan to make a schedule of days he can masturbate. Again a few days later. This time it was obvious that wasn't working so we ditched that idea and I did everything I can to satisfy him. I found out again today and it hurt. He was finally honest with me and just said he can't stop and he doesn't want to stop either since it is his fantasy that I cannot give him. I love him so much and I want to be okay with it but at the same time, I just want him to stop. Why can't he? He said if he could he would but he says when he tries he cannot think of anything else but those pictures and it starts to drive him insane. But it's constantly eating at me as well while everything else in our relationship is so good since we worked out the other problems just not this one. If I can let him do it I want it done healthily since he has been doing it since he was 11 and it's a severe addiction that he will wake up sometimes 7 times a night to do and go to work afterward. I will admit that some of this not wanting him to do it is my own insecurities but at the same time, it just is past a healthy amount of consumption. I just want some tips on how to kind of suppress this obsession of his with my help. Anyone who has had a similar problem or situation that helped it. How?