Why can't you discuss everything in society?

Arbitrary taboos are arbitrary. They're also necessary for any society since they shape and are shaped by the norms of the people... And what else is society, except for the norms of everyone that you know?

But also, I really think that masturbation wasn't such a big deal before the Internet and glossy porno mags. Societies change slowly. If it is recognised as a real problem one day, it will be discussed. But that day is probably far in the future, maybe after I'm dead. In the meantime there is always NoFap, RTribe, and other places like that. You can discuss stuff like that here!

 

It's not always a good thing to discuss personal issues freely among people. This site is different, since we all generally have the same problem and the same goal. Out in the real world among various people, I find that 10% of the people you tell a problem to actually care about your problem and empathize. The other 90% are secretly happy you have the problem.

 

Hi Lone_Wolf! I remember you from the fight club group. Are you still active there? Great to see that you have made it a week. I believe most people have their hands full worrying about their own problems. They simply dont have any leftover resources to deal with others problems as well. The 10% you are talking about are probably the minority who have overcome their bad habits. I believe the number is significantly lower than that tough.

 

You must be thinking of someone else, since I was never in any group of that nature. Thanks for noticing I'm almost at a week, though. Appreciate it. I see you're doing well too.

 

Well, ok My mistake. Your screen names are the same tough.

 

I did that with sex addict Anonymous (S.A.A) in Village Inn once. Had other crazy conversations at truck stops. We have free speech in this country. You can't get arrested for talking about sex. One guy had raped a woman and was talking about that. I couldn't do that but that's what this group did. Shared anything and everything that got them into S.A.A. At the same time it's your groups conversation. No one else's. Who is anyone else to judge?

In hide sight I would error on the side of caution. Although we do have free speech in this country. All the people around us that can hear and see what we say and do are employees and employers. So getting a job in your area after someone hears a conversation about you could be tough. If you have no worries about future employment then I can't see any chains to your tongue except your own conscious.

 

P.S. about the Sex Addict Anonymous groups. You can check your local paper or try calling a Alcoholics Anonymous meeting and see if they have info about that in your area. The do also call some groups Love Addicts Anonymous. Even if you haven't had sex one can go but at the same time be prepare for all types of problems with sex. Up to and including pedophiles.

I couldn't deal with seeing everyone in public. Even though it's anonymous. I just had a problem with pmo. Not with relationships, or anything else. So from that point of view it's tough to relate but one can go to an "open" meeting to check it out if it's available in your area. Usually held at a church.

 

One of my friends told me I shouldn't even mention my addiction and PMO habit to my new girlfriend, when I get one.
Not until we're months in the relationship.

Because girls feel disgusted by this.

By what? A man trying to better himself, facing his demons and stop throwing his seed away?
Why would she be disgusted by this?

 

For the first few dates I would avoid the conversation if possible. Dating is about getting to know each other and not selfish addictions. That's why a lot of people on this site look for other interests in the process of stopping pmo. They can be helpful conversations. It's not disgusting, I guess some girls may judge one maturity level with the conversation.

I would think about it and play that song in your head over and over. See if it feels okay to you if/when you talk about pmo with a girl. Personally I think it's just not going to sound the way you want it to sound. Just like not everyone likes the same song or there are songs girls like and men hate. Pmo is one of those conversations that men can have and a few women but most women aren't into it or we have to test the waters.

Kind of like this song metaphor. Does it work or not?

 

I discuss my porn problem with people. Some are cool with it and some not. You need to read the people.

 

I agree with this idea from Wolfie; its ok to have boundaries. when friends earn trust, reward with trust. the same goes for us all, when we earn trust, receive trust.

 

Society takes a long time to change