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Why I HATE you porn.

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by traveller22, Apr 20, 2016.

  1. Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

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    Porn is "free" because people are stealing and redistributing porn from legitimate porn studios. Most uploads on the sites that I shall not name are from professionally recorded porn movies.

    This is very similar to what the recording industry suffered before the recording companies brought lawsuits against Napster, Kaza and others who redistributed copyrighted recordings.

    The difference is, the porn studios will not garner the sympathy that the recording industry received. The porn companies are also not as united as the recording companies were.

    Further, anybody can place a tripod and make a porn movie. It is not quite as easy to make a musical recording that will garner hits.

    Unfortunately, porn will continue to be free and accessible to all. Paid for porn with age verification is going to be a thing of the past.
     
  2. francisable

    francisable Fapstronaut

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    I will think of this often, it has captured my feelings to a t. Thank you for posting this.

     
    traveller22 likes this.
  3. Bucklord

    Bucklord Fapstronaut

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    It invades and conquers my imagination.

    This is the last step for me, if I cannot remove it from my mind I will always be tempted to relapse..
    Anyone have any idea as to remove reoccurring pornographic scenes or thoughts from the mind?
     
  4. Hanging by a thread

    Hanging by a thread Fapstronaut

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    I hope with enough time if not watching or fantasizing that it will fade away. Perhaps try other things and hobbies of positivity to replace that?...
     
    lfromcr likes this.
  5. Namekian23

    Namekian23 Fapstronaut

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    It's good that you've identified why you hate porn and all its negativity. But I see no difference or purpose in hating something that much. You can hate an ugly picture, but guess what? It's still gonna be an ugly picture. Much like if you hate porn, porn will still be the same and will never change. However, you can change yourself and how you view it. What is hate by the way? That word is so strong that I try to stay away from it. Instead, try to make another, more positive list. One that is more productive such as a series of actions on what you will do with your porn addiction, so you can live a better life.

    Making a list of why you hate porn is good to acknowledge, but in reality, you're not doing anything helpful to yourself. You say you hate it, but what else can you do? That's where the next step plays a role. Your list is pretty damn good, don't get me wrong, but all this negativity will only bring more frustration and disappointment. Like I said, make a more positive list. Much like a person who hates being obese, it's better to think positively on how to change one's appearance, and take action rather than complain about it.
     
  6. traveller22

    traveller22 Fapstronaut

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    Hi Namekian23.

    The main reason I posted that list was to make clear in my mind, some of the many things that porn does to me. I'm certainly not spending my days thinking about how much I hate porn - if anything, my actions show how attracted I am to porn.

    I agree that we don't want to be locked into negative emotions & as you rightly point out, porn is not a person - it's a thing. While it won't be affected by my "hatred", it's important for me to keep in mind all those nasty & negative impacts it has on my life.

    Ultimately I want to kick PMO for good, precisely because of the intensely negative effects it has on all the positive things in my life. On that basis, I see this list as positive in intent.

    I would recommend that every PMO addict make such a list, to keep it fresh in their minds.

    Forward we go!

    T22.
     
  7. lfromcr

    lfromcr Fapstronaut

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    i AGREE with both of these:

    I like @traveller22 's list because it shows us women something their own guys may have been trying to express. My husband told me a couple of these things early on, but I didn't realize it was true until I heard other guys say basically the same thing. Women usually think, "Yea, right! You don't hate it!" but when other men say the same thing, we think, "Hmmm… that's exactly what my own guy was saying. Maybe he really does hate it!"

    I also like what @Namekian23 said: Build a list of things you like to focus positive energy on.

    AND THERE'S A THIRD THING TO KEEP IN MIND, which really seems to release the guys we've talked to: Get real with that part of you that LOVES porn. Why? My husband said it helps people understand WHY they turn to it. What the payoff is.

    Then they're one step closer to identifying triggers and risky situations AND they're one step closer to finding the 'real itch' that is wanting to be scratched through PMO.
     
  8. Namekian23

    Namekian23 Fapstronaut

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    I agree with most of what you said. Some people just prefer other methods for dealing with porn addiction. Before I joined Nofap, I was miserable with my life. I couldn't talk to girls, I was depressed, and a whole bunch of other crap. I'm a man of action, and the only way I saw myself getting out of my PMO habit was to try to keep myself as busy as possible. I did things that I didn't do before, such as going back to my temple and volunteering, finishing school, and slowly working on the social skills that I lacked with women.

    I would say I've improved over the last several years to due to my commitment towards my goals and accomplishments. Porn isn't the issue; it's the things in your life that are contributing to it. I had the same mindset at one point; it was good to vent out my frustration on my PMO addiction, but it didn't help me to become the person I wanted to be. That's why it's so important to not only acknowledge how you feel about porn, in your case, but to somehow take action on it.

    Nofap has supported me for years. They helped me identity the actual reasons for my porn addiction. I was stressed out, unhappy living with my parents and caring for them, and never having the chance to experience any freedom. Now I'm trying change who I am by doing the things that will get me there, and that can only be achieved through hard work. Once you identify what's causing your porn addiction, that's where the progress will begin.

    Like I said, being aware of how porn affects us is great to keep in mind. That's actually one of the first steps: acknowledgement. Now that we know how it makes us feel, we need to tell ourselves what can we do about it. For me, PMO is the hardest thing I've ever faced, but I find it helpful to focus on changing the things that are causing my porn addiction. I'm not trying to pinpoint any downfalls to your list or suggesting how much hatred you really have on porn; in fact, it's great to keep in mind. However, I'm just trying to help you go a little further than this. I use to have a lot of negativity about porn, but I'm trying hard to find a different path to overcome it. One that is more positive and meaningful. But either way, we'll eventually achieve our goal.
     
  9. Buzz Lightyear

    Buzz Lightyear Fapstronaut

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    Actually, it's simply not true that you hate it. :)

    Though part of you hates it, part of you loves it. Got to focus on transforming the part that loves it.
     
    overcomefap likes this.
  10. traveller22

    traveller22 Fapstronaut

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    @Namekian23 , it sounds like we're saying the same thing. The list of things I hate about porn gives reasons for the powerful mantra, "Porn is NOT an option", which is something I'm finding very helpful. I'm in no way locked in hatred toward porn. It's just a fantastic reminder of all reasons why I intend to never look at it again. I've reached 7 months & relapsed before, so it's vital that I remain clear about what a return to PMO would mean. Apart from that, I'm continuing to establish & strengthen all the positive things in my life.

    @Buzz Lightyear , yeah that's it - focusing on the positive, "outer circle" things in our lives & avoiding the "middle circle"/risky things is what it's all about. If we get that right, returning to PMO will become less and less of a possibility.

    Strength to us all!

    T22.
     
    Last edited: May 10, 2016
    Namekian23 likes this.
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