Why is "White Knuckling it" bad?

For some reason I’m not sure I understand your meaning. But if it’s death grip syndrome then it’s somewhat a bad and good thing to me. The penis is a sensitive organ. When you white knuckle it or grip it to intense when you wank or just want to fast your killing your sensitivity.

 

There were some helpful articles when I searched google just now on "white knuckle recovery" that describe it. Its basically a very strained, will-power based way of staying off the given addiction. It's like straining to avoid a given behavior without actually getting the required support... I think its also just trying to be very regimented and "achieve" a lot but still missing the necesary emotional support.

The alternative is to get enough support. So I do that by going on nofap forums a lot. It puts me in a place where its kind of easier to not pick up.

I do think that irritability is no fault of the individual. There is a lot of shit to be irritated by. Second hand smoke, industrial noise, wi-fi... A A often belittes people who experience anger in recovery as "dry drunks" but that is a total misunderstanding. It actually really pissed me off just to read that. Anger is a good thing and means that there are some changes that need to happen. It isn't always about accepting bull shit. So anger doesn't mean the persons recovery is insufficient... Thats more based on crappy religions that the 12 step programs sprung up from. The 12 step programs now are a lot less religious but they still have those yucky religious roots.

 

Damn I think I was a bit off....

 

I think it's breeds the mentality that "I can do this without anyone's help, if I just try hard enough". I'm not saying that's impossible, but it's like climbing a mountain barefoot for no reason. Most people need shoes and most people need a little support.

 

Indeed, the only true and sure way to break any habit is sheer force of will. Exercise that free will, don't let your own body and bad habits control you. We are so much more than that, let's live up to it for a change.

 

I can give an example of breaking addiction by sheer force of will, or "white-knuckling" and why it's not the first choice. When I stopped smoking cigarettes, I did so because I had to. I had work reasons for having to quit smoking, so there really wasn't an option to continue smoking if I wanted to keep my job. Basically, the medical department refused to submit an asthma waiver for me to continue in the service I was in while I was a smoker, so they made a deal with me. If I quit tobacco entirely, they would submit the waiver after I had been off for 3 months. My wife smoked, my friends all smoked, half of my co-workers smoked. I had no support in this, but it had to be done. The patch was offered, but I turned out to have an allergy to the adhesive. They offered the Chanitx pill, but I read about the side effects, and declined those. My wife at the time didn't have any interest in quitting smoking so I couldn't get away from the smell, but since I liked having a job, I white knuckled it and successfully quit, with 1 or 2 relapses in that 3 month period, but after that 3 months, I didn't ever smoke another cigarette, even to today, and this was about 11 years ago. It really sucked going through that, and I wish there had been another way to go about it, because I didn't ever feel happy during that 3 months. Every day was like another mountain to climb. It got really old, and frustrating. In the end, the waiver that was submitted got turned down and I lost that job anyway, but I decided not to pick smoking back up, and it took me almost half a year to get back to feeling happy most days although losing my job might have been a part of that. I would much rather have the support of friends and family while I'm going through such a trial. Even if the end result and the process at its core is the same, meaning it's still all about you the 1 person, stopping a single behavior, it's much less stressful to do that when you have people in your corner cheering you on and willing to listen to your words when times get tough.

 

Right, it's you against your cravings, but for the cigarette example, imagine the difference between quitting smoking while the people you spend all your time with are smoking, and no one is really holding you accountable day to day versus having your support network of friends all encouraging you to quit, reminding you that you want to quit, and helping give you alternative options for activities to take your mind off of what it is you're craving.