Wishing for better tommorow

I dont know why i feel so weird right now .But i want to write my heart here i was actually quite weird during my pre primary school days i had skipped a class (nursery ) so i had difficulties coping up with my mates and i was actually quite dumb back then and quite bad at studies but in class 6th everything changed i started studying maths properly and i became quite good in it so i became overconfident and struggled a lot .

in class 8th i met some people in my class who used to beat me abuse me sexu ally and a lot of things . And introduced me to p initially i just watched it for fun then i m for the first time and then it became an habit i didnt know that it was a problem it felt really good and it relieved my stress but in class 9th everything changed i met good people and everything changed i used to abuse simce class 4th i left that and my whole life changed my grades in maths shot up in my mid term i was near to failing but in the final exam i got second rank in the whole class especially my class consisted of mainly toppers .

Finally life started to improve in 10th also and it kept improving but still in whole this i did m frequently and after some time i discovered NoFap and read abt all this and figured out the problem as my health (basic porn addict problems ) became very bad in class 10 but life continued . I had never got good grades but finally acheived the feat in class 10th bcz i worked a bit hard in class 10th now im in class 11th and facing quite challenge bcz of new friends. I had not made much acheivements till now in anything but i think i can do anything now .

im going under an intense training (NoFap ) and there are three things in religious texts which are considered to be enemy of a person. Lust greed and anger so im fighting against them

Roses are red
Violets are blue
If i can people can do it
Then i can do it too

P.S this is my first post also i had craving for the other gender since childhood