Woman Raped

I’ll tell you one way it can happen since I was heading in that direction.

1. I was going to Church a lot. I participated and helped in several areas. I’d be in the chapel at least five days a week setting up, preparing, and doing work in the office.

2. I was watching porn everyday and one of my favorite genre was rape porn.

3. I had developed a bitterness and hatred for many of the attractive women at church because I felt they were rejecting me. (And who can blame them. I had an immature view and attitude towards women that anyone could easily pick up).

4. My porn driven mind started including women at church as part of my rape fantasies.

5. It never happened with me but when we think and fantasize about something long enough we are very apt to eventually act out on those fantasies. I was headed right into that criminal lifestyle.

In fact, one huge reason I decided to go to professional counseling is because I was starting to plan out how I could stalk and rape an attractive woman at the gym. That was my bottom and I realized I needed to get professional help, I was (am) one F’d up hombre.

That’s one reason crap like that happens. There’s other reasons it can happen too.

I’m no longer a church goer. I’m finding that the things my church told me to stay away from have actually been successful in my battle against porn addiction, mainly a professional counselor and secular motivation books and videos. The Bible bashing was no help at all.
 
Ugh, that's awful, no matter where it happened. :/ Christians are far from perfect, unfortunately.
 
HopeForBrightFuture said:
I’ll tell you one way it can happen since I was heading in that direction.

1. I was going to Church a lot. I participated and helped in several areas. I’d be in the chapel at least five days a week setting up, preparing, and doing work in the office.

2. I was watching porn everyday and one of my favorite genre was rape porn.

3. I had developed a bitterness and hatred for many of the attractive women at church because I felt they were rejecting me. (And who can blame them. I had an immature view and attitude towards women that anyone could easily pick up).

4. My porn driven mind started including women at church as part of my rape fantasies.

5. It never happened with me but when we think and fantasize about something long enough we are very apt to eventually act out on those fantasies. I was headed right into that criminal lifestyle.

In fact, one huge reason I decided to go to professional counseling is because I was starting to plan out how I could stalk and rape an attractive woman at the gym. That was my bottom and I realized I needed to get professional help, I was (am) one F’d up hombre.

That’s one reason crap like that happens. There’s other reasons it can happen too.

I’m no longer a church goer. I’m finding that the things my church told me to stay away from have actually been successful in my battle against porn addiction, mainly a professional counselor and secular motivation books and videos. The Bible bashing was no help at all.
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So sorry to hear this tragic experience. I hope you can one day make peace with God again despite this heavy disappointment.

There are different experiences with church. Brotherhood can also play a vital role in healing.
I remember years ago a brother confessed his terrible attraction to kids to me. That was shocking but most of all I felt for him, as that temptation has not been his choice.
His choice was to never ever act out on this. Which he succecfully managed (incl. help from professional counselors). he is now happily married.
One ingredient for his healing were close, trusting relationships.
I guess my biggest lesson from Jesus is that all of us are messed up in one way or the other. No need to look down and evaluate who is worse or better.
 
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