Working in retail has a big impact on my urges

It's been a little over a year since I've been working in retail. And it's much different than doing landscaping, being in a library, or working at a nursery. It's just dealing with customers all the time, and that includes women especially my age. The only thing that's keeping me from going to a different job is my own department and the access to my benefits.

I work at a super Walmart in the lawn and garden center. Although it's not as busy as the front end or the electronics department for example, people still come and go. On the bright side, I get to enjoy my time with the plants while learning other areas of horticulture. This has been the best part of being in a place like Walmart.

However, my interaction with customers can be a little shaky. First off, I'm a total introvert. I don't like small talk and I'd rather be by myself checking on inventory or sweeping the patio outside. Although I have a better time interacting with older folks, I have more difficulty dealing with younger women my age. This includes female coworkers.

I'm wondering how can I improve in a situation like this? If anyone who is working in retail, and has any advice, let me know. The worst part is the urges that I get. It's not easy trying to look away from that beautiful female customer or that cute coworker behind the register. Plus, I get nervous when things like this happen especially when I have to interact with them. Working in retail has its ups and downs, and apparently, this is one of them. Can anybody give me some feedback?

 

So I guess you have interacted with women in retail as well. It's just that whenever I see a pretty customer or a coworker, I would have this little anxiety attack. It feels similar to when you're doing public speaking. Have you ever had that before? That's what I'm trying to get over.

 

I use to work out at a gym myself and I know exactly when you mean. I had a time where I was in a yoga class once, but I guess I don't have to go further than that. However, working in retail is tricky because sooner or later a pretty person will come up you to and may have a question or need assistance. At a gym, if you're really confident in yourself, you can speak to any woman you'd like. Like I told Sandsii, I get this little panic attack when there's a pretty customer or coworker around. That's the only thing that's driving me crazy, otherwise, I would talk to them as if they were any other dude.

 

Wow that's probably the best advice I've heard on this topic for quite some time. When you asked me those questions, I remembered thinking deeply about them. It's not so much that I subconsciously see these people as goddesses or the fact that I'm not worthy of talking to them, it's mostly because I'm just afraid of rejection. Very similar to public speaking as I've mentioned, it's the fear of failure. And having done public speaking myself (even though I'm a total introvert) I remember the shaking, sweating, and nauseated feeling in the stomach every time I presented myself in front of those people.

With women, it's the same thing. I'm afraid I might mess up, do something or say something stupid, and so on. The feeling never goes away, but one thing I do know is that it does lessen when I actually approach them and when I try to engage to have a simple conversation or just by saying hi. That's the only time when my nervousness suddenly decreases. Also, what you've mentioned about being nervous on the inside versus on the outside are two different cases. I believe it's quite true in fact.

But when talking about public speaking once again, I felt better when I was forced to do something that I knew was positive for me in the long run. However, when talking to women, forcing myself is much harder. You can easily chicken out on talking to them, whereas public speaking you have no choice. Anyway, I'm getting off topic, but that's the way I look at it. It's similar to what I'm experiencing with women, but maybe I can apply these examples to help myself get better when it comes to socializing with women.

 

Again, that's some good advice. I guess it's time for me to make it or break it. Besides, at least I've had some experience to begin with. Wish me luck!